Donette is so right. You are no longer dealing or talking to the person you knew but you're talking to the substance. I think when I got really angry with my daughter because she had raked me over the coals one night about what a horrible person/mother I was, I just blew up. The next morning I was still angry and she didn't even remember what she'd said. She started recognizing just how bad it had become. I think she scared herself that night.

Keep the faith, Chatty. He might knock on your door someday and I will pray for that. It's so painful and as mothers, we tend to blame ourselves.

Yes Donette, I'm so thankful that I know where she is and is being watched. Her room mate is in really bad shape. They put her back in the medical facility. Has been taking speed for a long time and I guess it's bad when they come down from it. She has bonded with my daughter, which I guess is a good thing...that she is trusting someone but they closely watch relationships being formed there and it isn't allowed.