Lil
I'm sorry you are going through such pain. I've been in three bad marriages and I believe the bad ones are even more difficult to end. The pain did subside however and eventually I could look back at it as just one of the things that made me who I am.

Pain has been a large part of my life and for me at least, the only way past it has been through it. I believe in wallowing then moving on. It's hard to see now, but you will be able to do move on too. I'll pray that the pain stops and you are able to move forward.

Kate,

My marriage is not yet a year old and I know that the new wears off and infatuation fades. In my previous marriages even at this early stage, the love was fading. In this case the love is growing. I hope it continues.

Blessings

Smilinize: sent you a proveate message.

Didn't even know this feature was there, myself, till it was pointed out to me by another. You have to check your profile and that's accessed by scrolling right then up to reveal the link.

garrie.

Oh -- and the translation of that questionable post is: "private" message! Ha!

smilinize, I loved your story. I am so gald that you finally found someone after the pain of three bad relationships. Lil, I hope that writing about what your experiencing is easing your pain some. Hopefully, it will help you get to a place where you will be able to leave it behind you.

I was just looking back through the posts and found this. I decided to post an update.

What I wrote in November continues. I am more in love every day. Maybe marrying someone you hardly know is a good idea.
After taking a step in faith we've spend the past eleven months getting to know each other. The wonder of that instead of ending at the marriage has become a part of it.
So often I hear people say the magic ended when they married. For us it just began.
Every day I find something deeper and more wonderful about my husband and he says the same about me. We're growing in amazement and embarrassingly happy. Friends on both sides are amazed. We almost don't fit in amidst a discouraged, disappointed, and divorcing population.
This must surely be a gift of God because neither of us could have imagined it.
I'm praying, please Lord let it continue forever and for each of my boomer friends as well.
smile

Smilinize,
I loved your story. It was so romantic and you both sound like you were made for each other. How wonderful to have such a relationship. My relationship is good, not romantic - but I have a good husband, good father to our kids, and a decent man. He does not do anything romantic and he hardly speaks, but I know he loves me. We've been through a lot together in our 27 years of marriage.

Lillian,
I have not been in your shoes but I've known many people who have. I'm sorry that you have had your trust in men ruined and that you are hurting. We can't change others, but you can get out of a marriage that is so painful to you. If you truly don't love him, it is not healthy for you to stay there and hate each other. One of you may end up getting hurt physically. I will pray for you and hope that things can turn change to make you happy again.

I might never have seen this thread if you had't posted a follow-up. How wonderful it is that you are growing in love! Thanks for sharing a bit of your life. It sounds like you've been through a lot, and God's blessed you with happiness.

Donna