DH and I will be giving his pg daughter and her dh and private baby shower. Why, you ask? Emotionally, I cannot attend a baby shower. I was not able to have my own and being around all the women who ONLY talk about labor, delivery, how beautiful the baby is etc is too hard for me. So, DSD likes the idea of a private shower so.........I'd love some ideas!

this is DH's first grandchild and my first step. Thsu far I have a onesie, a little statue and that's it. what else shall we get (not too expensive) both for her and baby? I'd love some neat ideas for his son-in-law-father-to-be as well. He's 39, and my DSD will be 33.

What are you thoughts from the "grandparent" perspective?

I'm not a grandma yet, but you can get a very nice stroller for a reasonable price. It's a useful item that is one of the first things a new mother asks for. Also, newborns go through a lot of diapers so you could go to your grocery store and buy a few packages of Huggies. These are a pretty good brand. Newborns need sleepers too. The ones with feet in them are nice. Maybe some of the other ladies have gift ideas for the father to be. I've never gone to a shower where the father also got a gift but it doesn't mean you can't give him something too. That's very thoughtful of you!

Ladies, any gift ideas for the new father-to-be?

This might sound like an odd Son-in-law gift, but how about a beautiful book that he can start reading to the baby...they're never too young to be read to. Hubby's son started reading to his daughter the first night she was born and four years later still reads to her every night. It makes for a very special father-child connection. Hubby's two nephews have always done the same thing with their children.

BTW, it just occurred to me that this was one of the things that MOST bugged me about never having children...I went to oodles of baby (and wedding) showers, bought hundreds of beautiful baby and shower gifts over the years, but never had one of my own, not even a wedding shower. I admit I always wanted a shower of some kind. Not anymore though, because I don't need anything. Maybe a Cuba shower, where everyone comes and brings a gift for us to take to the kids in Cuba. Now there's an idea.

Eagleheart, I never had a wedding shower either. I was 24 and my husband was 31 when we got married. Although it was a first marriage for both of us he was well-established and we felt there wasn't anything we needed. The book is a perfect gift idea. How about the Velveteen Rabbit or Love You Forever (a tear jerker of a book.) I read to both of my children from the time they were born up until their 12th or 13th year. Hubby read to them too. We took turns.

Ladybug, "Love You Forever" is such a beautiful book...always made me cry, but I haven't been able to read it since my Dad and Mom died...afraid I'll soak the book and ruin it!

I also love Velveteen Rabbit...my first one wore out beyond repair and finally had to be thrown away. The new one's hardly ever been opened, which for this particular book is a sad thing, isn't it! But when my granddaughter learns to read, all of these books will take on a whole new life again.

My son and his wife are expecting their first child in March. As part of his birthday present last month, I gave my son a book titled "Why I Need You: 100 Reasons" by Gregory Lang. It is a lovely book, very simply written with beautiful pictures. It has simple "advice" such as, "I need you to make sure my bath water isn't too hot," and "I need you to remember that I can't help having little accidents now and then." Each bit of advice is on its own page, with an accompanying picture. Before I purchased it, I sat in Barnes & Noble reading it and getting all teary-eyed from words and pictures. Truly a must-have book, IMHO. Amazon has it at:

http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/1581824408/103-5553112-1619040?v=glance&n=283155&s=books&v=glance

Oh,the books sound wonderful! I think I'll order a few. Yeah,the Dad usually gets the bills! LOL!!

they got used stroller already. He is making thie crib (he's quite a furniture maker!). I've never read the Velveteen Rabbit nor the other ones for that matter.

Keep those ideas coming!! I love 'em all!!

Ok, I just ordered all three of these books! I'm taking ya'll's word for it. I have no idea what to get, so I'm finished!

Now, what about idea for "favors". there will just be the four of us.

Get my thinking cap on!! any ideas?

For "favors" check out any Babies R Us store or Card Party outlets. When there just ask the clerks for ideas. You'll love the book, Love You Forever. My kids had it read to them in pre-school and when I heard about it I had to have it. We've still got it. Dr. Seuss books are my favorites too, all of them! Good luck, you're on your way. You will be really appreciated Grandma!

Any other book ideas anyone? I really don't like "magic" type reads, but more moral and traditional kind of stuff.

thanks for all ideas!

[ November 27, 2005, 01:37 PM: Message edited by: Di ]

Eagle, great idea! Why not throw it yourself? I'll send a gift for a little guy in Cuba! When is your trip?

People, by Peter Spier. One of my all time favorites. Two fo our children are adopted from Korea. This is an awesoem book because it speaks about how different everyone is, and what a boring world this would be if we were all the same. The illustrations are remarkable.

For a favoe, how about some kind of Christmas tree ornament that would remind all of you of the shower for years to come?

Eagle, count me in for a gift as well.
chick

Thanks Dotsie and Chick for your gift offers. Smile recently threw me/us an awesom cyber-shower at http://www.boomerwomenspeak.com/cgi-bin/ultimatebb.cgi?ubb=get_topic;f=33;t=000059;p=1
which was wonderfully thoughtful and really lifted my spirit.

As for gifts for Cuba, many thanks, but our cup...er, suitcases are already overflowing for our next trip (we leave Feb 16th for 4 weeks). We can't take any more stuff for this trip...we don't have enough room for everything we've already collected thus far...2 fishing rods, several dictionaries, 3 Spanish Bibles (a gift from my aunt), a portable CD player, snorkeling gear, lots of watches, and a huge assortment of clothes, toys, toiletries and jewellery.

We have a lot of fun hunting for deals all year round, but not so much fun trying to fit it all into our alloted weight restrictions! But we're flying with a different airline this year, and they have a more generous weight limit, so we might get most of it there. We finally realized that if we buy 4 large soft-sided hockey bags (with no wheels), we can fit a lot more stuff in and still stay within the weight limits. (And they're so cheap that we can probably leave one bag behind for someone there to use and buy a new one next year.) The big suitcases with wheels are already very close to being too heavy for the charter airlines, even before you fill them!

[ November 28, 2005, 03:27 PM: Message edited by: Eagle Heart ]

Maybe next year. Let us know.
chick

One of the best baby shower gifts I ever received was from an Aunt who had a woman there with a camera that took tons of pictures and they were presented to me when developed with a beautiful photo album to put them in. I still have it and love looking at it even today with my son (the baby expected) and his wife and his children.

Chatty, great idea.

Eagle, waht are we going to do without you for four weeks. Have you check to see if you have internet access?

Thanks Dotsie! There are public computers with Internet access at the resort we stay at, but it's expensive and very slow. Up until this year, I haven't had any reason to need Internet access while away. Now I don't know what I'm going to do without BWS for four weeks! I might have to get online once a week just to keep in touch.

Once we're in the hot sun and gazing at the ocean from those warm sandy beaches, we tend to crash headlong into long, lazy, hazy days. We lose all track of time (except when it's suppertime!) Everything else just slips into the back of our minds, not to reappear again until we're on the airplane putting our longjohns and heavy sweaters back on over our tank tops and shorts! That used to be a real problem when I was working full-time as the computer network administrator, because my brain would still be so lazy and sun-fried, it would take me a few days to reacclimatize and be able to think again!

My ex-boss hated it when I went to Cuba for vacation...partly because he couldn't phone me there or call me back from vacation (because you can't just up and leave Cuba anytime you want to) (which was a huge part of why we went there in the first place) and partly because it took me a few days to get myself back into the job.

Know that you will be missed but always in our thoughts, you are a Santa of sorts to so many who really need it and thats commendable and something to be proud of....Enjoy the sunshine and the happy faces of those you bring such joy to...

Eagle,

We'll miss you at least as much as you miss us. It's going to be awful without your wit, wisdom and wisecracking.

What'll we do?? I'm missing you already. Hurry home.

smile

Wait, I'm not leaving yet...not until mid-February! Sorry for the confusion. Maybe it's because our small bedroom is so overlowing with stuff for the trip that it's constantly on my mind...that and the cold snow!

So, thanks for the kind sentiments, but I'll still be around for another 2-1/2 months!

You mean I went through that whole withdrawal experience ahead of time?

Oh well, at least you aren't gone yet. Glad to have you back... err here.

smile

Well, consider it a practice session for the real thing.

Maybe we should have a practice "Bon Voyage" party. And a practice "Welcome Home" party while we're at it. Then we'll be all set for the real thing in February.

I'm just kidding...I'm still enjoying the ripple effects of the cybershower!

Well shut my mouth Eagle, thought you were going there for Christmas, sorry for the misinformation Smile...

The "shower" went really well. Come to find out that ours was the only official one they will have! Her work gave her a lunchtime one, but that is it. Too many people live too far from them.

I wrapped several books and gave them one at a time. Then a few other gifts, then the basketful of stuff like a pacifyer with a medicine dispenser attached, a nail clipper with a magnifying glass, some castille soap, baby wash (a cotton bag I made with lavender buds and oatmeal), a "first bath" stuffed frog/rattle, a couple more reading books for baby, some emu balm for diaper rash, some bumm balm, a onesie etc. Our doggies even gave them a gift: another onesie with doggies and dog bones all over it. Too cute!!

What fun!!!! I think they really appreciated it. We sure had a blast wathing them open everything!!

[ December 07, 2005, 11:07 AM: Message edited by: Di ]

Di, I'm really happy to hear that it went well! I'm sure they were/will continue to be delighted with everything. It's clear to us here that you put a lot of loving thought and care into putting the shower and goodies together. I'm sure that your loving thoughtfulness will speak right through to their hearts and continue to warm them throughout the coming weeks and months when they finally get to use all that wonderful stuff you gave them. And of course, the books will probably become a much-beloved part of the baby's life.

Thanks for letting us know how it went.

Di, I'm so happy to hear the shower went well. How could your step daughter not love you for it?

Wish we could all be so fortunate to have someone think of us with thoughtful deeds as you do for her.

Thanks, you guys. You make me feel good!

Every time she uses one of the articles from her wonderful baby shower she will think of you with love in her heart....

That's true Chatty and isn't the step daughter the lucky one?

Actually Ladybug I think this shower has created a win - win situation...and thats a wonderful thing.

It is Chatty, it is.

Di, your heart's in the right place! I know you're well on your way to becoming a treasured step-mom. I know I'd love you if you were mine.

[ December 10, 2005, 10:48 AM: Message edited by: ladybug ]

Interestingly, a couple of family members have sent gifts, in addition to a friend. I'd sent out email announcements of this "private shower" because I was so excited! Not really thinking they would attend, but at least I offered. I accept DSD as my own and I do those things I would if she were my own. I told her it was the only real chance I'd ever get. And funny enough, no one in her family is giving her a shower!

I'm so happy because they are acknowledging this as if she were my own daughter. Warms the hearts of both DH and I.

Di, I'm sure she feels the love you've put into all of this.

It would make me feel very special in this situation to know I was the one who gave her a shower as if she were truly my own daughter.

My blessings to you and the entire family. Encircle each other with love and caring, all else will fall into place. You really are someone special Di!

Since your kindness has opened the door for you and your husband, don't be afraid to step inside often with notes and phone calls and little things sent for the baby every now and then. This is such a great beginning for all of you.