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#210107 - 01/05/11 11:23 PM
Re: Pets & People
[Re: chatty lady]
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Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 601
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I don't know what to say. I know a few people who don't like other people and a few who don't like pets, but most folks seem to like both and feel the loss of any loved one, human or pet, deeply. I think the pain comes not just from losing our pets, but knowing that we will outlive them. It's hard.
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#210112 - 01/06/11 03:42 AM
Re: Pets & People
[Re: yonuh]
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Registered: 11/04/08
Posts: 601
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Oh, no argument from me. But how often do people react to a human's death with, "Oh, it's for the best," or my personal nonfavorite: "he's in a better place now." I know that the people who say this are trying for something comforting, but it can really sound dismissive. I have even heard people say they 'got over' a parent's death in a few weeks and don't understand why someone else is mooning on about her mother's death.
I know it's not the same thing and the topic is the bereavement at the loss of a pet, but often we seem to miss each other's signals and needs. Sometimes we just need for someone to say, "I'm so sorry you lost ____," -- no waving it away as no big deal or deciding we should be happy or relieved.
And I think that was Chatty's point: losing a pet can be and is a big deal. I sure miss some of mine*, even if I knew it was their time to go. The silly cat sleeping on my legs really makes me laugh with her antics; I hope she's around for a long time.
*Well, I miss all of them, but some weren't around that long. I feel their loss but not as much as the ones we had for 15 years. Their loss is what might have been.
Edited by Ellemm (01/06/11 03:00 PM)
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#210125 - 01/06/11 03:53 PM
Re: Pets & People
[Re: yonuh]
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Member
Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 4876
Loc: Canada
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When I was growing up, our house wasn't pet-friendly, for some reason. We had a cat for all of about 2 days and then it disappeared, a canary that died after about 2 weeks. After that, we were never allowed to have pets again.
But I did meet two dogs in my lifetime who left wonderful memories in my heart. One belonged to my church deacon who was also my spiritual director for many years. That little dog had an uncanny ability to read my soul and knew just when I needed some TLC...she would greet me at the door, then come and nestle at my feet for the entire time I was there, sometimes resting her head gently on my knees. She always made me feel warm and loved. She died many, many years ago, but she will always have a special place in my heart, I could never forget that warm heart beating against my feet.
The other dog, Michaud, belonged to my husband's niece. We connected immediately, and he would do the same sort of thing, though he was a huge dog. He would crawl up on the couch and lay his head in my lap. One time when we were staying in their spare room in the basement, hubby and I were in the room getting ready, when Michaud came prancing into the room with bright and happy eyes, carrying a small pillow, clearly expecting to sleep in there with us. Michaud brought much joy and warmth to my life, and though he's been gone for many years, he also has a special place in my heart and will never forget him. I still miss him terribly whenever we visit that house.
_________________________
When you don't like a thing, change it. If you can't change it, change the way you think about it.
(Maya Angelou)
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