Hi all

I'm so excited I found this site today. Funny how things work out...I actually found this site because I subscribe to HARO and this site was today's sponsor! I feel like I was led here and am looking forward to looking at more of the posts and seeing what other boomer women are doing.

I'm almost 51, have one son, 21, I gave birth to and 2 others (22, 28) I "acquired" when I became a newlywed just over a year ago. Meeting my new husband on match.com was an adventure in and of itself.

For over 25 years, I've been involved in technical communications and last year, for my 50th birthday present, my hubby said "why don't you go live your passions?". So I am...I've recently opened a motivational speaking and coaching company and am scrambling to learn all the web-related stuff (although a techie on some topics, I feel like a web virgin...guess I *get* to be some kind of virgin..grin).

I've decided this site is going to be my primary morning stopover while I drink coffee and figure out what I'm going avoid (oops, mean "do") regarding my business.

Blessings to all...I know each and every one of you is an Amazing...and I look forward to getting to know you and learning what I can do to support this community and be of service.

A warm welcome, MamaRed! This really is a special place full of amazing warm, witty, wise women. Home away from home. I'm glad you found us.

I'm 53, retired and living life at my own pace. I never had children of my own, but to use your phraseology, "acquired" hubby's two grown children when we met. Now I'm making up for lost time and opportunity spoiling my two grandchildren (7 years and 21 months) and loving every minute of being a grandma.

Again, welcome. I'm looking forward to hearing your voice here.

Welcome, mama red... I checked out your passion/purpose/spirit...you sound like a fun person. Hope you stick around.

Hi Jerilynne!

What a vibrant and fun addition to our community!

Please check your PM box; I just wrote to you with an idea.

Welcome!

Lani

MamaRed, I read through your site. You radiate inspiring joy and passion.

Welcome!

Mama red!
Dancer9

Welcome, Mama Red.

I met the love of my life on match.com, also. Yes, I know what you mean when you say it is an adventure. I had so much fun.

I am 55 (gosh, I think I turn 56 tomorrow), live with my life partner, no children, and as happy as I try to be.

Enjoy your morning posts, here.

Welcome, Mama Red. I'm 61 and still here, doing more.

Yuhooo honeyyyyy! <Queen hiking up royal robe and running to the front of the forums, trips...drops her bag of Oreo's...says a dirty word, then scrambles up, and is off running again>

Yuhooooo! Hey Mama Red! <puff, huff, puff> Whew! We have something in common already! My sisters call me Red...or big Red, mostly.

Welcome to a great boomer hang out. I hope you enjoy yourself and get knee-deep to a giraffe's butt in post. Have fun, don't worry bout spelling or dangling part-a-cips. Just have fun!

Hello Mama Red, my father named his boat "JeriLynn" nearly the same spelling as your name! I liked your site. Some of the books you feature I haven't heard of before, so I am eager to delve into what you recommend. I am 54. Married since 1988. Author of Beyond the Tears: A True Survivor's Story http://www.beyondthetears.com
And today I put my Colorado Real Estate license inactive.
How do you like your coaching biz? PL

Hello Eagle Heart

LOVE your name (I have an eagle on my wedding band!).

Thanks for the welcome and I spent waaaaaaaay too much time having fun looking at posts and articles on this site yesterday. Or not...grin. It was all perfect, eh?

I don't have grandchildren and, although I think it would be ever so much fun to spoil them like you are, I told my boys they could wait. None of them are in a particularly favorable financial situation and I believe now isn't necessarily the best time to add the gift and challenge of kids(of course this is the world according to MamaRed!). So I will wait and do my "oohing" and "aahing" over the kids I see at church or while shopping!

I look forward to learning more about you and would love to know the origin of "Eagle Heart", especially since we've been discussing eagles and their meanings in the mentoring group I'm a member of.

Hi gims

Thank you! I sooooo appreciate your kind words and welcoming spirit. I'm truly blessed.

I look forward to learning more about you and the other amazing women on this forum. Sounds like I've found a home away from home!

Hi Eagle Heart

I'm grateful for you taking the time to review the site...it was a HUGE leap for me to put it out there and I'm in the process of building a new site too. I'm glad the site radiates those aspects because that is what I'm about and what I want to share with the people I meet and share time with.

Hello Dancer 9

Thank you! I so appreciate the welcome and the feeling of being so welcomed. I look forward to learning more about the members of this forum. Sounds like I've come home!

Hi Anno

You did? Really? I swear it would be kewl to put together a booklet of boomer women who found their mates online. I met my husband (Gil) about 2.5 years ago after some kewl dates, bizarre dates and a *whole* lot of looking at what was really important to me. Some friends of mine were convinced I was doing my transformational work by dating 'cuz I rode the roller coaster all over the place. Up, down and everywhere in between. One of my big surprises was when boomer women said "Gee, if you found at mate at 48, then there is hope for me too!" It never occurred to me that my dating story would be a ray of hope for someone. How life does throw us interesting things, eh?

I think that is one of the big reasons I want to work with boomer women in my coaching practice(never thought of myself with that name either, which may be why I didn't find this site from my other searches!). We have sooooooo much to offer, eh?

Happy Birthday to you and enjoy your special day knowing the world got a great gift when it got "Anno Energy"!

Hi Saundra

What an inspiration you are! You go girl!

Hi Queen JJ

OMG, I'm rolling on the floor with laughter. I LOVE your sense of humor and look forward to seeing more of it! I shared your "knee-deep to a girafe's butt" with my hubbie because it sounds like something he would use in a conversation. He cracked up all over the place!

I'll *try* not to worry about spelling stuff...seems to come with the territory of being a tech writer for 25 years! Now, as to dangling part-a-cips...that may be easy to do since I can never remember what the heck they are!

Hi Princess Lenora

So great to meet you!It is interesting that you father named his boat that...it isn't a name I've heard often over the years.

I'm glad you liked the site! Once I either a) get more web savvy or b) get a webmistress I would like to increase that list. I've read a lot of great books (or at least parts of them) that I think others might enjoy.

So, what does it mean that you put your license in an inactive status. Is has the energetic of a very big step for you. Is it? Are you moving onto something different? Something more to your core nature or liking?

As for the coaching, I LOVE it and hadn't realized I've been a natural coach most of my life, so it feels like falling home. In fact, ask my hubby or son and they'll tell they sometimes wish I wasn't such a natural (grin).

Here is to a passionately powerful day full of unlimited possibilities!

Hi Lani

Thanks...and how in the world do I check my PM box? EEK, I'm not seeing where it is! Ah, ain't technology wunnerful (when you can figure it out!)

Not only do I know how to check my PM box - I have no idea what it is once I find it!
Hi Mama Red, I'm 'greene' (real name Kathy) and new to site also. I hope you enjoy it as much as I have.

Oops - should have said 'do I not know how'

Mama Red

I am also a (non-practicing) life coach. I had to drop it this past year because of my cutie pies illness, but I, too, was a natural and loved the work.

Yes, we did meet on Match.com! Honestly. A friend and I joined together for giggles, and I came out with the man I adore. Yes, I dated lots of mutts, mismatches and shallow Als. I even had one guy send me a photo of himself standing in front of one of his precious corvettes, stark nude. JackA**.

Jerilynn,

Well, I see you found your PM area as I've just gotten your response!

Thanks for your kind comments, too - forgot to mention it in my reply!

Talk soon,
Lani

Hi Kathy

Grin...I kinda figured you meant "I have no idea" ... I did manage to find it this morning although, for the life of me, I'm not sure how I got there nor, necessarily how to get back. It kinda reminds of the time I set out to do research for my kindness stories website and spent hours wandering around websites and had not a clue in Hades of how I ended up where I ended up!

Although the internet is grand for connecting (like we are right now), for someone who has research in her blood, in can be a downright dangerous place to get lost in!

Have an amazing passion-filled day...and I looke forward to hearing from you again soon.

Way kewl (not the illness of course!) I had a guy share his webccam with me (in the days when I didn't know how to spell webcam) and let me say, I was more than a bit surprised at the view shared! Oh my! I didn't realize how much of a prude I could still be until that moment!

I hope your cutie pie is doing better! I'm sending healing energy that way (for da bode of ya as they say here in Chicago!).

Hey Mama Red, give me a clue as to where to start to find the elusive PM box.

Hi Greene!

Just go to the hot pink bar at the top of this section; where you see "my stuff", there is a drop down menu that includes "messages".

When you have a new message in your box, there is even a little flashing envelope! It's all very cute and just too too!

Lani

Green...did you find it? If you have messages (thank you Lani, you're a doll!), you will see a list of them once you have follow the instructions that Lani gave you. If there are none, it will be blank.

Also, no matter what page you are on, if you have a message, you will see a blinking envelope at the top of the page. You can't miss it..it's very annoying! ha!

I'm going to send you a PM for a test. To respond to it, just click on the folder.

Hi greene, glad to hear you are enjoying the site. We have a new updated version and I am still finding new things here. Meredith you are so funny.

Hi greene and Mamared....welcome to both of you! You've found a great place....stick around and you'll see!

Welcome new friends..from Scotland
Mountain ash

Hi Green and MamaRed - You both sound like you'll fit right in with this wonderfully, mixed bag of lovely women. It's addictive and you'll be charmed by everyone here. So glad you both found the site.

Red I'm from northwestern Illinois. Where is Waucunda? Never heard of it. Went to your site and thoroughly enjoyed it. Kudos, girl!

Hope to see much more of both of you. Welcome my friends.

Hi Mountain Ash

Thanks so much for the welcome...I appreciate it!

Hi Sandpiper

Great to meet you...I've sooooooo enjoyed myself during the last couple of days and do find it addictive. I just joined NAWWB, so I'm diving into the deep end!

Wauconda is a northwest suburb and I'm not surprised you haven't heard of it, since it is pretty small. It is out near Crystal Lake, Woodstock, that area. Thanks for the kind words about the site...I'm honored you chose to take a look!

Hi Lady Jane

Thank you and I'm glad to be here. Wow, ya'll have helped me feel sooooooooo welcome!

Hi Meredith

Thanks so much and thanks for including some info about you. Hum, shoulda left him, eh? Some days I sure feel that way! I took a look at your jewelry and it is beautiful! What a gift you have. I haven't read any of your materials...I was too busy enjoying the beauty the jewels created by such a jewel!

Hi Mama Red---
Just joined here myself.
It's nice to welcome you here also.

Thanks MorningGlory...this is an amazing group of women, isn't it?

Mama Red, whoops, almost missed welcoming you. Been down for a few days, computer transfer of data. Glad to see a new member of the boomer clan...You are gonna love it here...

Hi Chatty Lady

Thank you! I'm truly blessed! I defintely understand the "computer down" gig. As someone who has made her living on computers writing about computers for over 25 years, I have had the situation happen many a time...and, in my book, its a whole lot of no fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope all is properly transferred and you're back up and running smooth as silk...

Mama, I absolutely love the quote you have on your home page. The second sentence is powerful. "What story are you writing today." Makes me want to be certain I'm doing something with meaning. Just love it.

Thank you Mama,
So you are one of those wonderful computer gurus huh? I am so inept with mine except to write and hop in here for some fun.

Hi Dotsie

Hi Dottie

Thanks so much...I appreciate the feedback! That is actually one of my own quotes and it is the basis of my speaking and coaching practice. I'm so glad to hear you're applying it to making sure you're doing something with meaning...because we all have so much to give.

One of my "thangs" is to help people hear the stories they are telling themselves and then finding ways to reinterpret the stories to be empowering and full of undiscovered gifts. I personally believe word choice is so important that I have a list of words I listen for and teach others to listen for and measure whether those words are empowering or disempowering.

One of my topics is tentatively titled "From Victim to Victor: Rewrite Your Story, Rewrite Your Life". However, my advisor has recommended I remove the front phrase since many people don't want to associate themselves with a "victim" label. To me, its empowering and I'm working to see what I say (there is that "story" thing again!) from the perspective of others!

Again, I'm so grateful for this forum and all your hard work and effort to put it in place. I joined NABBW yesterday and am looking forward to learning more about it too!

Hi Chatty Lady

I am in some ways, totally inept in others, especially the internet marketing and website stuff! In fact, I was so frustrated with trying to get some web stuff done that I gave up on my usual approach, the one I've had since I was two ("I can do it myself mommy!) and hired some help. I can't believe the feeling of relief knowing this supertechie is going to make sure all the behind-the-scenes stuff is done correctly.

I've created 6500 page documentation sets faster than I can get a bulleted list on my web page. ARGHGHGHGH!!!!!!! Grin.

Hi Dotsie

Oh geez, I just saw I boo booed by putting your name twice on the same post and misspelling it once. My apologies!

Welcome, Mama Red, and I am glad you are enjoying being a part of this great group!

MamaRed, I like the 'Victim to Victor' phrase. It shows the positive progression that can be accomplished. I was a 'victim' to bipolar and alcohol and have 'progressed' to live as a 'victor'. To me the phrase speaks of the hope of being able to work thru the change of status.

Sharing our stories is one of the resaons this site was launched because I beleive we all learn from one another's stories. Mama, we have that in common.

Hi Greene

Thank you for the feedback...that is how I perceive it too! I find it empowering to think I can turn tragedies into triumphs if that is the choice I make. What my advisor said is that it is likely to turn many meeting planners "off". And I definitely want to be in business and am finding that line between what resonates with the business world and me as a person serving as a motivational speaker. Interesting challenge this has been, interesting challenge.

Hi Dotsie

Definitely glad to hear that! I used to believe I needed to be stoic, and have a happy face all the time for people to be OK being around me. And I still strive to find a peaceful happy place to be. However, I have learned that it is often the "tragedy to triumph" story that most inspires others to take a look at what is going in their world, their "story", and see what they want to do with their life. 'Cuz after all, I'm out to help everyone I can live an "igKnighted" passionate life!

Welcome! Pull up a chocolate bar and stay a while. Glad to have you!

Or at least some chocolate covered almonds. They're good for you! They are, aren't they?

Hi AmyDoodle

Thanks...a chocolate bar sounds nummy...especially the new fav in my cupboard (Chili Chocolate from Lindt). A young lady who lives in Germany, whom I call my adopted daughter by choice, sent me a Chili Chocolate bar as a Christmas present and I was hooked!

Dotsie...I sure hope the chocolate almonds are good for us 'cuz they are a staple in our home (my husband is a full out chocoholic and I can tell my hormones are whacked when I'm craving chocolate!).

Thanks Cindy...I appreciate the welcome! Hope all is well over there in the land of gorgeousness! I've never been to Hawaii, although one of my brothers lived there for a long time. He wouldn't be stateside now if he hadn't gone through a divorce and wanted to me close enough to see his daughter on a regular basis. He misses it tremendously!

Good morning,

I too am new to this site. Years ago my daughter joined a group for step moms and found it very helpful, supportive and fun. I decided today, to try the same thing. A little about me... I am a 61 (first wave of boomers) year old teacher planning to retire after this upcoming school year. I live in upstate NY where the winters are cold, snowy and sunless. But the sunshines daily through the eyes of my two grandchildren ages 4 and 1. My life took a dramatic turn (not alone in this I know) when my husband of 37 (now 39 since no divorce has taken place) decided to leave his career, move to Florida and try his hand at teaching. The teaching failed but he did find a new teacher. After using me and holding off his decision to return for a full year and watching me deal woth the death of my mother, he returned home, stayed 6 months and left again this time to return to the new teacher for good.

I am not whining any more, I am a new person and a very greatful one. I have a bright future, supportive friends and great children and grandchildren. I will be approaching the divorce soon although my husband doesn't see the need for one.

I am proud to be a boomer and would love to hear from people. While I am not dating, I am still available and my chilren have threatened to enroll me in match.com Any comments on that? Thank you for taking the time to read my intro and I hope to hear from others. Donna

WELCOME newest Boomer sister Donna,
Honey, most of us have been there done that. Good for you as JJ said above me, for picking yourself up, dusting yourself off and getting on with the rest of your life. The only thing I would advise is "file for divorce" before he does. Because these fools are like bad pennies and keep popping up. If the teacher gets smart and dumps him he may figure he can slither home to you...Dump the bum!

Welcome Seagull, glad you chose oto jump in and share your life with all us boomer gals here. You'll find we have more similarities than differences.

I'm proud of you for not sounding angry. You must be very strong. Sorry to hear about the death of your mom. I ost mine seven years ago and I know it hurts.

Glad you are able to stay focused on the postive, and if you can't you can share that too. Our moods change here at BWS, as you can well imagine. One day we can tackle the world, and other days we have a hard time with our own little nest.

Hello Seagull and welcome ... I haven't been long and have loved it...so I hope you do too!

Although I know this isn't the easiest time to be going through, it most certainly sounds like you're chosing to focus on the gifts you do have. My deepest congratulations to you!

I do echo the thoughts of a couple of other women (having been in a similar situation with a former husband). He was off living with another women and wasn't "sure" about filing for the divorce. I honked him off big time when I went ahead and filed AND it got the ball moving and I felt better for moving ahead with my life.

As a veteran (tee hee...if you can call it that) of the Match.com style of dating, it depends on what *you* want right now. It can be a blast if you go into with an attitude of wanting to have some fun and see what is happening in the world of dating. It can also batter the ego and self esteem if it isn't something you're ready for. Like everywhere else, there are awesome people who are ready to enjoy their time with you and there are others who lie, cheat, and completely misrepresent themselves to get what they want.

I remember my mom asking me why I was on there if I didn't want to "find a man"...my reply was that I was out to reintroduce myself to the dating world after a 2 year, self-imposed hiatus from even recognizing the males of the world. After my ex husband's behavior, I wasn't sure that men should be allowed to live, let alone date one of them! I learned a lot, about me and about men, and had some real ups and downs with the process, especially since my self esteem was in the dumper regarding my looks and "attractiveness quotient"!

So it really comes down to what you want, right now.

Again, welcome aboard!

Hello Seagull from Scotland.We are much of an age..and I too worked with children then bigger children then adults.
Winter is acoming so the site will let you see what others from other areas do. and how we connect.Short days here in winter too.
Mountain ash

OMG, I can't believe it has been a year and I forgot about all of you. I never learned how to work my way through this type of conversation and just now rediscovered it. Please forgive me. As for me, I am still married but moving in the right direction. I have finally managed to get my hands on all the financials and will be retiring soon. That is when I plan to move on with everything. I am hiring an attorney this Fall. On a funny note, thoughts on this one. August 16th was my 40th wedding anniversary. I was away by myself, got all dressed up, went to a very expensive restaurant, sat outside with two glasses of wine and ordered my dinner while watching the sun set over the water. When the bill came I just smiled and paid the $136!!! noting that I am worth it. Of course when the credit card bill arrives I may have second thoughts. I am enjoying myself but a little nervous about retirement and finding the right things for me to do. Again sorry not to have been in the loop but I will try from now on to a better member and friend.
Seagull

I am sorry I never responded to you. I forgot about the site and just now remembered. I hope this is a sign of being busy and not something else. I have never been to Scotland, have you been to the US?

Seagull..doesn't matter how long...you are replying and thats good.
I have not been to US but embrace the fact we can connect here.
How is life for you and what are you interested in.

keep posting...
do you live near the shore ?? hence Seagull

You will be surprised how soon you also feel like a boomer sister. The love in this forum wraps around us all, you too, as if it were fur and we the minks. WELCOME!!! Brave to you for planning so far ahread.

Welcome (back), Seagull. For some reason, I am always taken by surprise by the warmth, graciousness, and acceptance of our boomer sisters. You'll love it here.

Hi, Seagull and welcome (back)! I love your attitude (paying for the expensive dinner)!

I got a divorce after 31 years of abuse, and have written my memoir and a book of poetry. I look forward to getting to know you!

Hugs, Alice (I live in Michigan/exile, but was born in Heaven--Maine!)

I hope chocolate covered Almonds are good 4 U. I eat enough of 'em!

Welcome Seagull! Fly around and have fun!

But don't leave any droppings.

Hi,
I remembered to come back. That's a good step. I am still trying to figure this out. If I click on my messages, why aren't any there? I need to go back to my original note to all of you to get these responses. Help. I have been invited out on my first date. Imagine 62 and scared to death. I never dated much and my "soon to be though he doesn't know it ex" is the only person I dated much less kissed!! ouch there I said it so now you all know how naive I am. Any suggestions? My date is sending a limo for me so we can go to a fund raiser at the Saratoga Race track (NY's answer to the Kentucky Derby) where there will be over 100 wines for tasting and foods to sample with a chinese auction. I don't know what to wear, much less what I will even look good in. Any advice, suggestions etc. Oh by the way he is even trying to plan in advance. He has indicated San Francisco would be nice for New Year's Eve. That is too far away for me. I should also tell all of you that he is 7 years younger and with a lot of baggage and I on't mean weight. No one is looking for anything serious just laughs and some fun. Thoughts PLEASE. dl

Hellooooooooooooooo Seagull!!!

I found Larry on match.com...we'll be married 4 years in March.

Have fun, be very cautious. Have you met this guy before? You say it's your first date? I can't speak for you but if this were me I'd 'meet' him and not go in anything he provides. I mean, do you really know him well enough to trust him like this? I guess I'm asking you how do you know the guy is legit and that the limo picking you up isn't a way to get you by yourself? I'm playing devil's advocate here. When I met match.com men for the first time I always arranged the first meeting in a very public place and I never got into anyone's car. I usually knew after the first meeting whether there was enough there for me to be interested in a 2nd date. It sounds romantic and all but I'd err on the side of caution than the side of romance/limo, etc. And since you're new at this and as you say, niave, and there are so many nuts out there (not saying he's one of them)...but, I'd be very careful until you've met him a few times on YOUR terms...then if you feel he's harmless and you wish to pursue him, then go for it. Just a thought.

Seagull, I agree with Dee. Meet him there if it's somewhere you really want to go; or somewhere else where it's very public. Always leave yourself a way to get out and get home. If he's sending a limo, and you don't like him or the party, how will you get home safely? It sounds romantic, I agree, but my first thought, if it were me, would be my safety.

Seagull,
Dee and Yonuh always give sage advice. Be careful but have fun.
Heck, 7 years isn't that much and I like younger guys. WB is
3 years younger than I am. A conservative pant suit always looks
nice, especially at a race track environment. Dee got a real nice
guy on the net. He's a hunk! Good luck!

Oh I forgot to say, you won't get any messages unless you send
a private message [PM] to someone. When the list drops down,
click posts! Then you can see your most recent postings and
answer them! Ciao.

ok thanks to all of you for the advice. I have known him for 2 years, we have spoken on the phone and have had lunch at a local restaurant. I drove there and drove home. By first date I guess I mean a dressed up occasion with a driver and a fancy place. My daughter and friends know where I am going and my son in law will actually be in the same area. Many people that I have known over the years will also be in attendance. This is a little nerve racking since my comfort zone is just a little off. But I have learned a lot about myself in recent years and I do know that I don't need a man in my life to enjoy life. Does that sound strange? I finally feel comfortable about me and don't need to prove anything to anyone. I am just interested in talking with and sharing fun times with people regardless of gender. Right now it is off to find an outfit. I did go on line to see what people wore at last year's event. As always thanks for listening er reading and sharing. dl

It doesn't sound strange. It sounds just right.

Oh my gosh. I love the Saratoga race track. We have friends who live in Saratoga and have been to the track several times in August with them. It's so much fun. What a neat, little romantic date. I can't wait to hear about it.

Sounds like you've got everything figure out...on that note...HAVE A GREAT TIME!!! And if you're out for fun then forget about the age difference...it's the attitude, not the age, that matters...if you're both on the same page then that's all that counts. Send us photos!!! Can't wait to hear about the outfit you pick out.
HUGS HUGS HUGS

Good luck Seagull. This sounds like so much fun. And I understand the desire for companionship. Everyone needs that,
now and again. Hope you have a wonderful time. Can't wait to
hear how it goes!

Seagull,
How did the date go?

Wonder if Seagull is still flying or did somebody clip her wings?

I'm wondering the same...

Seagull, that's an amzing first date. How can this man possibly follow that up? We're all waiting to hear about it.

Has seagull flown away??????

She must be still riding around in that limo!

I'll be interested in your Kick Butt kindness. Clever title.
You may enjoy reading a recent post on my blog about rudeness vs. kindness.
http://www.boomerpie.com/