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#151116 - 06/19/08 08:37 PM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: gims]
Edelweiss Offline
Member

Registered: 06/05/06
Posts: 4136
Loc: American living in Europe
Gims, my first thought was negative. It’s the word “but” that bothers me. If the word “and” were used…then it would be positive. Also the rhetorical question, “aren’t we”…seems sort of sarcastic. Of course the way it is said does play an important part.

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#151117 - 06/19/08 10:13 PM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: Edelweiss]
Mountain Ash Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/05
Posts: 3027


Negative

Unique
We are all uniquue even to our twin.


But
like others say the word "but" concerns me

Aren't we
No one else should make an assumsion on what I would believe


I see the statement as a "value statement "
because

How could I know what someone else views as unique

How could I accept that the proviso "but"
due to this being dependant on the first line..

How could I answer to anything as complex with a simple
yes or no. So I would ask for a clearer statement..then dependant on that..review my thoughts.


Why do you ask
Mountain ash

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#151118 - 06/20/08 02:12 AM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: gims]
Eagle Heart Offline
Member

Registered: 03/22/05
Posts: 4876
Loc: Canada
Quote:

I think I came away from her writings accepting we are here to learn lessons*.




Gims, what uncanny timing for this comment. I had an amazing session with my therapist today. We talked about regrets - as some of you know, I am tortured by regrets, stemming all the way back to childhood. Regret has been an overwhelming debilitator in my life.

But today, she told me how she sees regrets in a positive light - how they teach us important lessons. So as 'homework', she asked me to write down some of my regrets, determine the lessons I've learned from those regrets and the ways I've been able to apply those lessions in other chapters of my life.

So I started doing that tonight, and was AWED by what I began to see. Every regret had its lesson, a lesson that I was clearly able to apply later in another similar situation...not only that, but every regret (so far) eventually evolved into a GIFT. For example, I was not there for my Mom when she went through her breast cancer - I was working thousands of miles away, and had no clue what cancer was at that time - didn't understand what she was going through. It wasn't until years later that I realized how awful it was for her to have to go through that without much support. After she died (from mestasized cancer) I was overwhelmed with regret for not having been there for her for that earlier bout of cancer. Until tonight, I hadn't made the conscious connection between that regret and my passion to be there for Gary. So the lesson learned was that we can't ever get back whatever time we lose by not being there for someone - and how nothing is more important (for me) than being there for my family. My application of the lesson learned came when Gary got sick, and without hesitation I dropped everything to be there for him. The GIFT that I was able to give to Gary was pure presence. He always knew that there was nowhere else I'd rather be than right there beside him.

So I took this exercise a little further and came up with a formula for the evolution of regret...I think this may be a threshold for me...

Regret ~ Lesson Learned ~ Application ~ Gift = Glass Half Full!

The "Glass Half Full" attitude has been impossible for me to even glimpse much less actually feel ever since Gary died. I may have just made a 180 degree turn tonight.
_________________________
When you don't like a thing, change it.
If you can't change it, change the way you think about it.

(Maya Angelou)

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#151119 - 06/20/08 07:28 AM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: Eagle Heart]
Mountain Ash Offline
Member

Registered: 12/30/05
Posts: 3027
Eagle You said

I was working thousands of miles away, and had no clue what cancer was at that time - didn't understand what she was going through. It wasn't until years later that I realized how awful it was for her to have to go through that without much support.
....................

Read that again..Eagle

Your were earning your living..not in the next street neglecting to visit.
I think if we can accept we did "our best at that time" then life evens out.
Also
"when I was a child I spoke as a child" I paraphase.
We are children in some areas of our lives long after we attain adulthood.That is how we evolve.

seems to me your therapist is being helpful
Mountain ash

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#151120 - 06/20/08 07:40 AM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: Mountain Ash]
meredithbead Offline
The Divine Ms M

Registered: 07/07/03
Posts: 4894
Loc: Orange County, California
Quote:

Look at (insert individual/pair/group), so unique - but, we are proud of (him/her/them), aren't we?




Gims, it's condescending. First,
Quote:

look at



implies at arms length, pointing at someone like an object
Quote:

so unique



Oh, aren't we so proud of ourself for saying something nice about them? We could've said odd.

Quote:

but, we are proud of (him/her/them), aren't we?



BUUTTTT -- it hurts us to say this, especially since we never really liked them anyhow, but since they've succeeded despite our low opinions of them, maybe we should say something nice and pretend to look like we mean it.

Like I said,
Quote:

Condescending.


_________________________
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#151121 - 06/20/08 01:27 PM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: meredithbead]
jabber Offline
Member

Registered: 02/17/05
Posts: 10032
Loc: New York State
gims,
I didn't have time 2 read the entire thread. But I sincerely hope that when I die, I go 2 B with my Heavenly Father for all eternity. Going thru this life once, is about all I can do. I don't want to come back as anyone or anything. I want peace in the valley. God, let my Christian beliefs come to pass! I've always been taught that in Heaven there's no more pain, separation, grief or anquish. Please let it B so!!!

P.S. Oh, and gims, I didn't understand that [in and of question]; I tried inserting my loved ones; and that didn't clear up anything 4 me?????


Edited by jabber (06/20/08 01:28 PM)

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#151122 - 06/20/08 04:07 PM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: jabber]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Eagle, I think you should be a therapist. I love the procedure you created. Make sure you share it with your therapist. It's brilliant!
_________________________
Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
www.nabbw.com
www.boomerwomenspeak.com


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#151123 - 06/21/08 06:40 AM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts
gims Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 3404
Loc: USA
dots, EW, MA, and MB... you all read it the way I did...
Now, here are the actual words... see if it changes the way you feel about the statement in any way:
    This (a couple) is a unique pair - but we are proud of them, aren't we?

I'll explain more after I get your inputs.

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#151124 - 06/21/08 07:09 AM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: gims]
Edelweiss Offline
Member

Registered: 06/05/06
Posts: 4136
Loc: American living in Europe
Gims, that "but" still sends off a negative feeling.

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#151125 - 06/21/08 07:27 AM Re: The Importance of Our Thoughts [Re: Edelweiss]
gims Offline
Member

Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 3404
Loc: USA
[Quote]
Gims, the Nicene Councils and the Ecumenical Council of Constantinople never discussed reincarnation. Where it was mentioned in the latter, it was only raised in so far as to condemn it. 'Where the notion of reincarnation proposes that death does not bring finality but endless opportunities for souls to live over and over again, the Christian belief is that one's body is as unique to its own spirit.' The destiny is resurrection not reincarnation as held by the Profession of Faith (Nicene Creed). For Christendom to believe in the latter, one must find some biblical evidence to support it and contrary to Heb. 9:27 "it is appointed that men die once, and after this comes judgment"




This doesn't totally negate the ideas in the book, because of the word men (as in earthly human form). The argument was more about the soul as a lifeform - I know it's farfetched... and because I'm no theologian or Bible scholar, it made me wonder what the original writing actually stated, before translation(s). What I was reading had the controversal argument going - similar to the argument they claimed was thrown at the N. Council by early church fathers (unidentified) - that we have lessons to learn in each 'life' (used loosely). Gnostics was referenced... which is an argument in itself... but, the argument was that there are planes, and the soul finishes it's lesson on this 'earth' to go on to the next. The way it read, it sounded as if it were other 'earths' planes. Never was clear on that point. But, knowing there are three (biblical) heavens , I entertained the ideas ... (you would probably be shocked at the thoughts I entertain).


[Quote]
By Christians? Did the book cite an authority on this basis? Did it offer any discourse on Easter?


I hardly ever read references, but there were some. And, no, nothing referenced Easter.


Edited by gims (06/21/08 07:30 AM)

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