JJ...what you said... two thumbs up!!

Kitkat,
Your husband sounds like my 1st mate, same personality traits. Perhaps, if you "exit stage right", you'll find a better environment than you have now. Who knows? But you sound so unhappy. And I know about stepchildren! They can really destroy a stepmother's life! Think about your own happiness. Do whatever makes U happy!!!
Prayers and blessings....

Kitkat, first I want to welcome you here...and to applaud your courage in coming here and sharing your story...that's something us 'oldbies' here might take for granted, but I imagine it must have taken a lot of courage for you to open up here. I hope that you will not only read the words that everyone has written, but soak in the great care and warm concern that's behind the words. This is a warm, caring group of women, many of whom have "been there, done that" and are gracious enough to be here to share their hard-won wisdom and experience with each other. I hope that whatever your decision is (and it doesn't have to be made today...maybe the decision will be to wait to make the decision - and that's okay!!), you will come and just "be" here with us and find refuge, laughter, vision, hope and companionship-along-the-way.

Thanks again everyone for your feedback. I appreciate the compassion, strength and words of wisdom from you all. I'm pretty much determined to make to move, but every now and again I think maybe it isn't that bad, and then "boom" something else happens... So like jabber said, i should "exit stage right". Does anyone live in florida? I'm not sure what the divorce laws are here. I guess I start by socking away some money, open a checking account and maybe start looking for an apartment.. I'll keep in touch, thanks again my dear friends!! Love to all!!!

Thanks for your most kind words Cubby, it's nice talking to people who have experienced similar problems. I'll definately look up the book you mentioned.

Kitkat...please click on this link and view the STATE resources. You should be able to learn just about anything you need to know BEFORE you take any steps.

http://www.themodernwomansdivorceguide.com/

I understand how you feel - I was in a very similar situation and in November I moved out after 16 years of marriage. It's been hard, but I feel so much better about myself and my future since I moved into a place of my own - no more walking on eggshells to keep other people from blowing up, so much less tension. You might want to talk to Humlan - she was a wonderful help when I was where you are now.

JJ, I was going to post the very same thing. Great minds think alike...or something like that.

We had the founder of that site do a teleseminar for the NABBW and it was most informative.

Also, please check out www.freshstartafterdivorce.com. Joanie is our Divorce Expert at www.NABBW.com.

Hope this helps!

Thank you ladies, you've been a wealth of information. I will definately check out the sites you posted Dotsie and I will talk to Humlan, thanks SueC!

BWS or NABBW are like the Encyclopedias for relationships, finances, marriage/divorce or raising cildren, husbands or even pets. The intelligence here is endless to say the least... Doncha just love it???