I found this discussion fascinating and eye-opening. I really don't have anything to add to the intense and heart felt discussion, but had to comment. I can say truthfully, there have been times when I talked myself into attending, and times I didn't attend just because I felt a few people were giving me a hard time. (I chair a committee) I believe I carry my faith and beliefs with me always, they may get lost in the hum drum of life, but I know I have always managed to call on them when needed. I try to attend regularly, but I do believe faith is what is in your heart. Great conversation! Dana

I'm taking this all in. Your feedback is helping me sort this out. Thanks. Keep posting...if you don't mind. You'll hear more from me when I get to the root of this.

I just thought of this analogy and was wondering if it makes any sense. Jesus took time out to worship alone. He went away for solitary prayer. Just wondering if that is what we need from time-to-time? Just a time to devote yourself to prayer and comtemplation without the hurry and bustle of the Sunday morning crowd? Jesus returned from his solitude with more conviction than ever before. Perhaps solitary pursuits need to come upon the human soul on an occasional basis? Would love your thoughts....


LM

In talking about the purpose, are you all referring to "A Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren? The sub title is "What on Earth am I here for?" LLL

mrsmuzz, I love your thoughts about Jesus getting away to pray. I believe wholeheartedly in getting quiet. It's essential.

Dana, I agree that faith is in the heart.

Evie and optimum, I believe it's not what we get out of church, but we we give God while we are there. There have also been times when I get more out of my prayer group or Bible study than Sunday worship.

What I'm realizing while reading these posts is it's not all about me. Imagine that? Worship is about what I give back to God. It's what I need to do to thank Him for the many blessings He bestows upon my loved ones and me every single day of my life. I need to go sing His praises.

Maggie, I believe all churches are made of sinners.

Julie, my husband and I did The Purpose Driven Life together. Are you doing the same, or is 40 Days of Purpose different?

smile, I also believe the church inside us is what's important.

After reading all your posts I've come to a conclusion. I haven't been going to church because I haven't been getting much out of it. How selfish is that?

My butt will be in a pew this Sunday morning. It may not be in my church home, but it will be a church. I can't make excuses for my weak disciplined self any longer. I'm only talking about me here. What everyone else does is personal. I've had my break, my time away to pause and reflect, and it's been good. Thanks to all of you for helping me work through this. I love you for your honesty. It's time for my to worship God in His house again.

please pardon the pity party for a moment - I need to whine.....

I'm beginning to realize I so desparately need that "break" you are talking about Dotsie. We have one of those Purpose Driven pastors who I swear feels its his purpose to drive us all into exhausation! He just keeps coming up with more ideas and things to do and there are precious few to do them. His heart's in the right place, but his workers have left the building. Add to that the heavy fundraising our church is doing right now for a new church, and some serious conflicts in the church and you have one stressful place.

So I guess my question is - how can I give back to God, and worship God without taking on too much? I believe in going to worship, I believe in serving God - so when I say, no I simply can not take on one more thing, am I being selfish?

I know - I need to be more serious in prayer and ask God where he wants me to serve. And then, I need to listen and do that.

How do we know what we are being asked to do is what God's wants of us, and not someone else's agenda???

Sorry, as you can probably tell I have too much on my plate right now and I just got asked to take on something else, and I kinda blew

and so you are heaping the guilt feelings on yourself because you need to say no? Evie, my dear friend, everybody has limits. Its okay to say I want to help, but I can't do this. I have other obligations. Someone else will have to do it. Its okay, and you should! You cannot do it all.

AND GOD KNOWS IT! Its okay....truly. If there ever was a good woman, it's you. I know from whence I speak. I found out from working in charities that there will ALWAYS be things that need to be done. It's like a bottomless well. I also found out I couldn't save every child, I couldn't heal every wound. So, I set limits for myself and when they call if I can, I do....if I can't, I don't.

Know you limits and let HIM (PASTOR) know them too. Better that than taking on too much and having resentment or burn out...Love ya!

JJ

Someone once told me, "it is not what you say, it is how you say it".

Several years ago, I was in the same position. I remember feeling overwhelmed, and I felt that I had to say yes or else I wasn't doing my Christian duty.

I remember one day, when I just couldn't take it anymore, that I poured everything out to this lady, and she gave me a simple answer. She said next time someone asks you to volunteer for anything in the church, answer with "I'll pray about it". At least that way, you will be given the time you need to pray about it, and to listen for God's answer.

I don't know if this helps. In my personal observations, I think too many pastors, and church member use what I call "scripture slamming" in order to put some guilt there.

Now understand, I am not saying this is done intentionally. I believe that the person asking is also very overwhelmed. When we get to that point, we kind of take our focus away from God.

This is just my opinion, base on my own observations.

God Bless,
Cathi

I was thinking this morning that "spritual guilt" is an interesting thing, isn't it?

I have absolutely no problem at work in telling people, "No sorry, I'm very busy right now and can't help you with that" or " I have A & B to do, if you give me C one of them has to go - which one?" but I seem to have trouble doing that in the church world....

Last night I dreamt I almost drowned, twice - once I fell in a lake, but was able to get myself out, and then I was "recovering" in a little cottage being looked after by a nice older lady and the cottage was being flooded all around it, we were struggling to keep the windows from popping out as the water rose higher and higher - and I kept thinking, I was saved from drowing only to drown again?????

I don't have to think very hard to get the message about this dream

Evie, here are my two cents:

First, always pray before you respond. God doesn't want you to burn out doing His work.

Also, REMEMBER THIS: When you say "NO", you give someone else an opportunity to say "YES". The person who said "YES" now has the opportunity to draw closer to their church community. Just think of all the people you've been robbin' of a closer walk with thee.

Now you can say "NO" without feeling guilty. Think about the opportunity you are giving to others.

I'm not being facetious.

All of us have God-given gifts. Before saying "YES" to church work we should be certain we have the specific gifts required to carry out the task. If we do, then we should feel joyful while doing our church duties.