I believe men who want a relationship with a woman do not expect or would be interested in a woman who has sex on the first, second, third, 4th, etc. date. The problem is, many men I've met do not want a relationship, or seem to.

When you get too physical in a young relationship, you stop getting to know each other and it becomes all about sex. Many people stay together, but the relationship is built on quick-sand rather than rock.

Besides that... a quality conversation is as good as, if not better than, sex and you can learn a whole lot more about a partner(-to-be). The more confabs you have, the more you learn about another person. Talk and Listen. They may try to bluff you at the start, but eventually, what's in the heart comes out of the mouth. Test what they say; watch to see if their actions measure up to what they've told you.

Seems to me that the older guys are still trying to prove something. I'd LOVE to meet one that didn't put sex so high up on the list.

And this may be a dumb question, but how do you go about doing a background check without having to pay?

Whirlwind

Remember the good ole days when most people were/seemed decent and honorable?

I dated a couple of men who were truly honorable in my 16 years of being single. One was too young and the other had some emotional stuff to deal with and I wasn't willing....maybe not able because I wasn't ready myself.

Do any of you regret letting a good one go?

I bought a really good book a few years ago titled "What Men Want" written by three professional men.(Doctor, Lawyer and Accountant) They were very honest and upfront in this book. They decided to write the book based on listening to dating woes from their sisters and female friends. The same old question came up over and over again "Why don't men call" They answer this in the book and there are some interesting reasons.
About the sleeping together part. They say they will try to sleep with a women who they are attracted to because they want sex. But, even though they want sex and will have it on the first date, they do say that they will feel differently about a woman who has sex with them on a first date. No matter how attractive they are, if they sleep with them on a first date, they won't call them again. They may sleep with them again if they run into them, but will never look at them as marriage or serious dating material. They admit that there is a double standard. Lot's of good info here although they are in their 30's and talk about dating from the perspective of finding someone they eventually want to marry. I'm past that stage but found some good info here as they take the gloves off and tell it like it is. They also have a website. Try googling "What Men Want" (hopefully it's still active)
Kate

katebcca - I just saw this older post of yours, about the book, "What Men Want", and you mentioned the website. I did just go to look and there's a ton of info there. So thanks for that!

I haven't really dated since my divorce (1989!) Just two single dates - both guys were nice gentlemen, but there was no "connection" between us. I know I've got to get back into the swim of things...but I was never one to sleep around back in the Seventies and sure am not going to start at this late stage of the game! I am trying to get up my nerve to write to someone from a "personals" newsletter that circulates around here. Surely there must be some decent men out there!

klmr13, what is the exact web site - I want to check it out, too!

Seems IMHO that men think women 'want it', or younger men surf date sites for older women who 'want it'! Well, what should matter is what we actually do want, and not what men perceive!

Mustang...here is the website: http://www.aspirenow.com/smooth_10_00_what_men_want.htm

Veddy interesting..!

klmr13,
very interesting...thanks for sharing...now to get in shape!

Yes, Jane...I don't know that I'm up to the challenge...sigh! After really not dating since my divorce, I'm very concerned about just not being attractive or in shape. And yet...my exercise bike/tapes/equipment just sit there...zero motivation!