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#104947 - 01/25/07 09:07 PM
How often in contact with your partner during day?
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Registered: 01/21/07
Posts: 3675
Loc: British Columbia, Canada
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Both my partner and I are intrigued how much contact some couples seem to have during the day when each person is at work or 1 person at home, on the go, etc.
Few wks. ago there was snowstorm , where I got a car ride ...from one of guys at work. It took 4 hrs. for us to cover 30 kms. During that time he and his girlfriend talked to each other briefly....4 times.
When I finally arrived home, I asked my partner if he would have appreciated a phone call. He said: Well, I knew the weather wasn't great. Or figure you'll go off somewhere by yourself for a coffee/go shopping.
Genuinely, we don't "check" on each other much during the day. We might email briefly or talk for 3 min. on phone....um..2-3 times per week while I'm at work and he is at home. Even when he worked, I rarely had the incentive to phone him. For both us, it broke our work focus.
Of course, we don't have children in the household.
We've been together 14 years. 3 years were spent apart where he was forced to relocate to a different city for work. During that time, we talked/wrote every day at the end of the day.
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#104953 - 01/26/07 02:07 AM
Re: How often in contact with your partner during day?
[Re: chatty lady]
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Member
Registered: 01/16/07
Posts: 3404
Loc: USA
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When I worked outside the home, DH'd call me at least 2 times a day. I hated it because, as Orchid stated, it breaks work focus. I worked in accounting and there were so many deadlines to be met, it was disruptive for me. He now works from home, so unless he's traveling, we talk pretty much all day. When he's out of town, he checks on me regularly - can be up to 4 times in any given day. I love when he's here, but I truly enjoy when he's out on a turnup or conversion. I'll admit, sometimes I wish he'd loose my number, but at the same time I want to know he's safe. I rarely initiate the call.
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#104954 - 01/26/07 05:36 AM
Re: How often in contact with your partner during
[Re: gims]
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The Divine Ms M
Registered: 07/07/03
Posts: 4894
Loc: Orange County, California
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Hubbo and I both work at home but don't speak much during the day. Mostly about food -- What are we having for breakfast? Are you coming down for lunch? What do you want for dinner?
When we're at the gym, we mostly talk about the upcoming dinner. It's hysterical -- "Do you want tuna?" "No, I'd rather have salad." "I don't want salad." "Then what about pasta?" -- on and off for 2 hours. That's if we're speaking at all that day.
It's even worse at the grocery store -- a running commentary on every item we may/may not want to buy.
If we talk about anything else, it usually leads to a fight, so food it is for now.
I go on vacations mostly to get away from him, so I communicate as little as possible. After being subjected to weeks-long lectures after I got back home (nag, nag, nag -- that's why I left in the first place) about how worried he was about me, now I send a terse email when I arrive at my destination -- "Plane didn't crash. I'm here."
Once upon a time we had conversations, but he always turned it into a nag-a-thon about crap that happened years ago, so I gave up talking to him. I have no desire to resume.
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#104956 - 01/26/07 11:12 PM
Re: How often in contact with your partner during
[Re: Vicki M. Taylor]
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Registered: 11/24/06
Posts: 2930
Loc: Belfast/Northern Ireland
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i am lucky think i got a partner with the same type of goals via communicasion, that it's gotta be connected in some way, even for ten minets.....if it dosent happen for a couple of days i get told i am missed ahhhh or i even say i miss u which gets a bit of connection going just cheecking in with each other problems get aired and resolved quicker than any other relashionship and i get to feel intimacy and love...
thats about all i wanted from a relashionship communicasion wise just 5 -10 minets of connection....
in the past i have relashionships that bug the hell outa me if i was working and they phoned when i was presurised then id just resent the interuption and probley be rude or sharp with them....I would hate the stalking calls when where why outa jelousy or insecurity......
i think for me it more to do with what the intension is behind the communicasion thats always more important....mostly than what the commmunicasion is about, if that makes sence...
celtic_flame
_________________________
"Our attitude either gets in the way or creates a way," Sam Glenn
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