When grass was something you mowed?

When pot was something you grew things in?

When D-i-c-k was a mans name?

When crack was a break in a structure?


Okay, now you name something where the meaning seems to have been altered or changed...

Not my original work but, nonetheless, a collection of alternate meanings for common words which cracks me up!

1. Coffee , n. The person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted , adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.

3. Abdicate , v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade , v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly , adj. Impotent.

6. Negligent , adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.

7. Lymph , v. To walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle , n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence , n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash , n. A rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle , n. A humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude , n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon , n.. A Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster , n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddishisms.

And think about all the new words (within the last 20 years) in our vocabulary.

Like:

Viagra
Ipod
cellphone
digital camera

Anyone want to add to the list?

How about:

Blogging
Voicemail
Instant Messaging
download/upload
Websites
Email etc etc etc

There is a Tim McGraw song.....I believe it's called Back When & it's pretty amusing along these lines!

Boy ask and I shall receive. You ladies sure came up with some doozies.

I found the song, Karen! So neat! Thanks for the tip!

Love that song.

Ever since our oldest went to school in the south, he has us listening to country.

I'm a city girl listening to country music!!!

On Saturday we had a TV show showing the journey Dolly Paton has made during her life..It covered her early years a child where her talent was picked up.Then her musical songwriting career..
She is a wonderful writer and her voice is truly great.
Her self esteme has carried her well ..she is one of natures stars.