Sometimes life just rolls me up in a spitball and flings me around the universe until I splatter to earth a limp imitation of my previous self. Other times, life inflates me with wonderful warm air and I float above the clouds where everything is beautiful and I can see forever.

Of course while I‘m soaring, I have to be constantly vigilant for the missiles aimed at me from below and sometimes I crash, but the freedom of flight makes it all worthwhile.

I’ve enjoyed reading the posts on here for a while and tonight I’m soaring so I thought I would share.

I'm over half a century old which means unless I live to be more than a hundred, I'm either half dead or half alive (according to how you look at the glass I suppose). It’s not all bad though. In fact, most of the time it’s pretty terrific.

I've been married four times and divorced three. I've survived cancer and three major car accidents with more than 30 broken bones and multiple internal injuries (all have healed and I have almost no long term effects except post traumatic arthritis). I have four grandchildren with another on the way and my two daughters finished college and now are excellent mothers.

Each time I was divorced I dated a lot of men. I went out at least once a week and had an very active social life. I received several marriage proposals, but I didn’t accept. I didn't intend to remarry as I was pretty well adjusted to being single.

Recently, however, I met a different kind of man. And I met him online. It was a sort of local discussion site. We instant messaged for a couple of evenings. I needed advice on how to end a relationship and he had ended a similar relationship so he gave it.

We discovered that we both had tickets to an outdoor concert and were both going alone. We discussed meeting there and somehow we decided to meet for dinner first. It was not a date. Just two people going to the same place for the same concert.

I was not at all nervous, but I was looking forward to meeting him. When I drove into the parking lot of the restaurant he was standing outside on the lawn waiting for me. He knew me instantly and I knew him. He was just as handsome as I had expected and he said I was just as pretty as he had expected.

I got out of the car and walked toward him. He put out his hand to shake mine but I walked into his arms. He hugged me and it felt right. We talked through dinner then went to the concert.

The music at the concert was not great and it rained, but I had an umbrella so we snuggled under it. Somehow one of us wound up kissing the other (he says I kissed him and I tell him I know it was him kissing me because he's almost a foot taller than I am and I had an umbrella--not a ladder!! Either way, from the moment our lips touched, we were smitten.

We sat my car and talked until they closed the park and from that night on we were inseparable. I took him to my church and told him how after my third divorce I had promised myself and God not to be sexually intimate outside marriage. He not only agreed, he said he believed the same and respected my decision.

One evening he planned a wonderfully romantic dinner at a fabulous restaurant. He had a guitarist play for us and in the candlelight he told me he loved me. I was not at all surprised. In fact, I realized that I had fallen in love with him also. After the restaurant closed we stood on the curb and talked. He asked me to marry him and without a thought I accepted.

On the way home, I asked, "Did you ask me to marry you?" He said, "Yes I did. Did you accept?" and I said, "Yes I did."

He said he had known all along that he wanted to marry me, but didn't really intend to ask so soon. I said I knew he would ask and wasn't sure what I would say. Maybe both of us just got carried away with the evening. But a week later, after praying together and telling only one other couple, we drove to another state and were married.

It was all so easy and it all just came together. We were married in the garden of a hotel and they threw in the honeymoon suite at no extra charge. We were nervous about being intimate immediately and went to dinner after. When we toasted our marriage, the whole restaurant applauded. After dinner we went back to the hotel and came together in love and passion.

Since that time, we’ve been through a lot. All kinds of joy and pain and even a death. But the two of us together are more wonderful every day. And every day we discover something more amazing about each other. I pray that we both continue to find more wonderful aspects of our life together and that we continue to experience the magic of love forever.

Smilinize,
Welcome again. Thanks for sharing. All of us tend to give a little history when we jump in and start posting so thanks for your's. How long have you been married?

It's interesting that you met online. I'm a Mom of teenagers and I constantly tell them not to talk with people they don't know online. However, you aren't the first adult I've heard of that has met a spouse online. Our world's a changin'.

well...that is the best story I have read in a zillion years. If it isn't true, I'm going to kill her because she has restored my faith in men.

That was absolutely beautiful and makes me think there might even be hope for the Queen...sigh...

my sister-in-law met her soul mate online also --

she was in a "friendship" marriage -- and not very happy and "just happened" into a chat room and before she knew it -- she had flown across the country to start a wonderful life with this man and his children

this was many years ago and she's still very much in love with a really GOOD man

so there to anyone who doesn't think God's angels surf the internet

Beautiful story -- the story itself and your writing.

Thanks Girls

And Jaws, if there's hope for me, there's hope for the queen. I had lost my faith in men for sure. But even at half a century, God can still send a special person along to change your mind (and heart)

And Lionspaw, I'm pretty sure you're right about God's angels out there surfing the net. In fact, even at this moment there may be a few lurking around this site.

Blessings.

well...I hope your right Ms. Smilinize...cause I'm already past that 50 mark +2.

ö¿ö Ick!

Hey Queen,

At 50 + 2 life's not icky. It's just getting to the good part. When I was younger I expected my life to be pretty much over by now (didn't we all?). But shucks, it's just beginning. I've never smiled more or laughed as often or been loved so much. And all that's making me, if not younger, at least better.

Onward!

I'm lovin' all of this. I agree with Meredith, great story, great writing. I was rapt. And yes, HOW long HAVE you been married?

My story about meeting Raul is similar to the story above, except we didn't meet on the internet. He didn't restore my faith in men, but I did have faith in him....Now I don't even have any faith in HIM. Maybe it's just too raw for me right now... I couldn't even imagine being able to have lunch with someone new, let alone open my heart and my mind to them. I thought he was my soul mate, but now I know he has lied to me for possibly years and years... and he's so self-righteous about it.

Last night, while I was sleeping on the couch, I took the broom we used in our wedding ceremony, which I had decorated myself and hung on the wall, and very calmly tore it up. I left it in the garbage can, where he could see it this morning. I just couldn't stand looking at it anymore, and I couldn't bear sleeping under it, while kicked out his bed forever. He was incensed! Incensed at my symbolic act... but self-righteous about having already ripped apart the marriage.

Why would he want me to stick around, and hang onto the things that don't mean anything anymore? I also went into the bedroom, had him take down the handfasting cord from our ceremony from over the bed where it was hanging, and I cut it in two. Hey, if it's not my marriage bed anymore, then that thing shouldn't be hanging there. Then I grabbed my silk flower and feather bouquet, and tossed that in the garbage can, too.

Does he expect me to meekly cherish all that stuff, all those memories, while he moves on and lives a completely new life?

I took the little journal I had started for our marriage, where I had neatly pasted the ceremony and the vows that a friend had written for me, opened it to the first page, and said, "Did you forget the promises you made and the vows you took? They're all right here." I opened the book to the first page, placed it in front of him, and walked away. I don't know if he read any of it, but when I came back, the book was closed.

I told him to keep the video of our ceremony. I didj't want it, and I didn't want to ever see it again. Then I crumbled up and threw away a little love-letter/picture he had drawn for me, about a week before my life blew up. It was a lie, with cute little sayings like "love 4 ever." He was already out of love with me, and continuing to lie to me, to pump me up into believing everything was OK.

He still doesn't get how he's hurt me. Now he's all mad because I have no more sentimental value for the wedding doodads. He just doesn't get it.

God, if I could just win the lottery tonight, I could be out of here probably by the end of the week. Florida law would dictate that my winnings would be community property, but 1/2 of a few million dollars is still a pretty good piece of change. No more feeling dejected and dependent on him... no more waiting months and years for some freaking agency to throw me a few dollars so I can get a book on the market.

It would be sooooo sweet.

Welcome to Lillian's dark side. And it ain't even Halloween no more.

Weird Blessings,
Lil