Today is Alicia's birthday. She is the middle child who often felt unnoticed and left out I'm sure. If she could only know how much I love her and how precious she is to me.

I wish there was a way to infuse your children with so much love that there would never be a doubt in their minds about how much you adore them and how wonderful you think they are.

One way I've found to let my girls know how special their birthdates are to me is each birthday I call them or if I'm with them, tell them their birth story. "On this day 28 years ago, I was in the labor room at such and such hospital...they had hooked me up to the drip and I was just starting to feel deep labor...three hours later you were born,,,etc,etc."

They always say, "Oh, Mom..." but I know they love it. I hope they know there's nothing I wouldn't do for them and with my youngest, I think I've proved it.

What special ways do you have to let your children know how much you love them?

~*~*~*~*Happy Birthday, Alicia!!~*~*~*~*~

"What special ways do you have to let your children know how much you love them?" That's a nice question NL.

My sons know I'm crazy about them. (ruffling my mother hen feathers…cluck cluck)
I show my love by letting go.
I show my love by loving their wives, and accepting their decisions in life. Our sons know they can always come to us if they need advice or help...and they do that too. The older my sons get, the better our relationships. It wasn't always like that. We've experienced stress, not in their teenage years, but from 20 to about 27. Boy, they were both late bloomers…their teenage attitudes came then! But now they are 29 and 31 years old. And it seems as if the age difference between our sons and us has become smaller. Figure?

I know many of you will appreciate this poem.
New Leaf....middle children do need extra (as you know)
Mountain ash



If I Had My Child to Raise Over Again
If I had my child to raise all over again,
I'd finger-paint more, and point the fingers less.
I would do less correcting and more connecting.
I'd take my eyes off my watch, and watch with my eyes.
.
I would care to know less and know to care more.
I'd take more hikes and fly more kites.
I'd stop playing serious, and seriously play.
I would run through more fields and gaze at more stars.
.
I'd do more hugging and less tugging.
I'd build self-esteem first, and the house later.
I would be firm less often, and affirm much more.
I'd teach less about the love of power, And more about the power of love.
.
By Diane Loomans

Interesting thread. Like Hannelore, I raised my girls to be independent and self-sufficient and yet they know that I'm always here for them.

For years I felt sad on their birthdays because I felt I had in some way let them down by not being able to provide them with the traditional family that I dreamed of before they were born. It was they who taught me that it was my dream, not theirs. They were happy and content with their lives and with how I had raised them. Now, I simply savor the day and like you NL...I recount exactly what I was doing at that moment all those years ago!

My mom is super...she always put us first...and at 80 she continues to always be there for her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. I know that I can never repay her for all the things she has done for me...so every time I've made a sacrifice for my girls...I always see it as giving back to my mother as well!

Gee-ish...you got me all sloppy and sentimental! Happy Birthday Alicia!

You gals got me all sniffley.

Happy Birthday, Alicia.

chick

Happy Birthday Alicia!
Sweet girl, if you want to know how very dear you are look no further than in your Mother's eyes when she's looking at you and thinks you're not watching. There you will find Real Love Glowing.
I applaud the Mother's making sure the middle child feels their special place in the family too. I only have 2 sons, so it's almost too easy. #1 is that every special "First Born" & #2 is Naturally "The Baby". Even boys enjoy the Birth story, the edited version. LOL

Thank you all. Mountain Ash, I loved the poem. I'm trying that with the grandchildren who live with me. Often the sink is full of dishes and the laundry is piling up but we untangle the fishing lines and buy a box of worms and head for the river. They love it! Aaliyah has a pink princess rod and reel and Dublin has a grown up one.

I pointed Alicia in the direction of this forum. She is the one whose husband just came in one evening, cooked burgers on the grill and then announced he had never loved her, that the sight of her made him sick and left her that very night with two little boys to raise. No warning at all. I told them at work I wouldn't be in, hopped on the next plane and came to hold her and comfort her. Her older sister flew down too and brought her three children. We gathered round her and just loved her and stayed up with her when she couldn't sleep, cleaned and cooked and got her out.

I want my kids to be independent too and self sufficient. I hope they know they can come to me with anything. I know I haven't always been the best mom for them. Hopefully they can see how much I love them by how much I love their children.

Newleaf, here is a poem for you that just came to me from your post. That happens to me sometimes. Could use some editing but what the hey! Enjoy!

The sink is full of dishes, the laundry's piling high
But fishing worms are wiggling and the sun is in the sky
Tangled lines and fishin poles are what we are a wishing
So we are gonna leave it all and just go off a fishing

We'll leave our dirty dishes and let the laundry pile
It is going nowhere, and we'll be back in awhile
Later, we'll make a game of chores, with bubbles in the sink
And sorting out the colors in the laundry too, we think

Tomorrow is another day, and if by chance it's raining
We'll splash in muddy puddles, round here there's no complaining
And if the sun decides to shine, and worms decide to wiggle
We'll wave good by to household chores, just turn and walk and giggle

We do the best to raise our kids, they know our love is strong
We teach them independence, We teach them right from wrong
Lets show them yet another love, a love that's also grown
The love we have for their little ones, the ones they call their own

chick