This is really a problem for me. I have posted some time ago about the hair loss I have been experiencing for the past 3 years since my heart attack. The hair loss is due to the medication, according to my cardiologist but probably also due to menopause. I see the loss more than the average person looking at me but professionals have also seen it, especially the thinness. Anyway, I have been going to the same hairdresser for over 20 years. I like her very much. Others in my family use her as well. Her shop is local in my community and she always will find the time to squeeze me in no matter how busy. The problem is I hate my hair (not just the thinning). She is not "up" on the styles, and right now I need someone who can make my hair look the best it can be. Today, I was desperate for a haircut. My hair is layered but the layers were way too long, thus making the thinness look worse on top. My regular girl was on vacation and I commited a mortal sin! I went to the leading competitor in our town. Some friends go there and recommended a male hairdresser that was EXCELLENT! I am so happy with the results, and that is quite a statement coming from me! He layered the sides, cut the top shorter so that it actually looks THICKER! I can't believe the difference. Now, what do I do? How do I fire my hairdresser of 20 years? It will be very awkward for me and for the family members that still use her. Am I being ridiculous? Hubby thinks so. He claims that since I am paying for the service, I should love the results. I agree completely but don't want to hurt her feelings. What a silly rant, huh?

Pam,

The old song claims there are 50 ways to leave you lover...then why should it be so hard to leave your hairdresser? It just is. I agree with Anne that you can just change and make no mention of it but if your town is as small as mine--you'll eventually have to let her know about it.

I hate confrontation and avoid it at all costs. One thing to do would be to go back to your original hairdresser while your cut is still fresh and let her know that you were desperate when she was out of town and had to get it cut but that you really love it and want her to see how it's done so she can maintain it.

Then she'll know that you aren't quite satisfied and will have a chance to cut it the way you like it. If she doesn't then she won't be surprised when you don't come back.

Warning! Warning! There's two things a woman never does. Tell her best friend she saw her hubby cheating, and tell her hairdresser she found somebody else. It's a no-win situation.

I changed my hairdresser one time and told her I wouldn't be back. Why? Because a NEW and RECOMMENDED stylist that I tried (on the sly) did such a bang up job on my hair. The next time I went it was horrible! So here I am, sitting in the car wanting to drive home with my head just barely above the steering wheel (so no one would see the horrible cut and style) and thinking, "Way to go you Ninny. You've told your OLD hairdresser you won't be back, this one was a one-time wonder, and your new hair cut resembles a buzzard who's been stomped to death by someone wearing track shoes. You look like a humorist on drugs."

DO NOT TELL YOUR OLD HAIRDRESSER ANYTHING. Either try the other one again and see if it's as good as the first time or just suck it up and go back to the old one. If you decide to try them out again, and it's as good as the first time, then just start going to them.

You owe nobody NUTIN. Confess only to the priest. Trust me on this one.

JJ

Thanks so much girls! JJ, never thought that it could be a one time goodie haircut! I think I will give him another try in about 5 or 6 weeks and take it from there. I do however need a color in a couple of weeks so maybe I will try him for that too. I will have to sneak in and out, this town is not too big and I know too many people!!

For a small fee I won't say a word.

Hey, otherwise, I'm singing like a canary....

WHAT? JJ

I agree.......don't say a word!!!
I finally gave up on my stylist after many years because I got tired of paying her so much!
It was over $100 for a color, cut, style.
That's just to much!!!
Now I go to a GREAT stylist who only charges me $63, and she found the right color for me the first time.
About the hair loss.
I started to lose my hair, went to a dermatologist, they put me on Iron, my hair turned curly, was on the Iron for over a year, my hair is back, very thick, went off the Iron, still have tons of hair, but isn't that curly any more.
Wrote all that in one breath!
Maybe you should have your blood tested, just for the heck of it to see if there is something that can be done.
Lynne

Whoops!!!!
I forgot....I'm on Biotin and Vitamin E also.
Lynne

I think hair loss has a lot to do with hormones if it isn't caused by medication. Whenever I've had a hair loss it was due to stress and I learned recently that when you are stressed it affects your hormones. I lost some hair last year and it's growing back now that I'm on my bioidentical hormones.

I have a friend who has always had very thin hair and I wonder if she had her hormone levels tested, maybe it would get thicker.

Do you need to tell your loved ones what to say when they go for a cut and she asks them where've you been? Or do you let them answer with their own words.

I have gone to the same hair salon for a long time and move around the stylists and colorists. They told me al long time ago that they do not take it personally when someone leaves and tries someone else. It happens all the time and when they loose one person another comes along.
We all out grow lots of stuff - our favorite grocery stores, our favorite line of jeans, and our hairdressers.
No apologies or explanations are needed. I agree with JJ - just move on without explanation, that way you are always welcome back if you decide to return.
Congrats on the great haircut. A great haircut changes an attitude like nothin else in the world!