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#15725 - 05/31/06 07:05 AM Special occasions
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Do you get misty eyed when special occasions are approaching and you think about your loved one who has died and won't be physically present to enjoy the festivities?

The kids are graduating this week (like you haven't heard enough about that) and I SO wish Mom and Nana were here. I know they are here in spirit. I turst that. But I can't help but think about what fun they would have by being with the kids and their friends.

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#15726 - 05/31/06 06:40 AM Re: Special occasions
chickadee Offline
Member

Registered: 09/26/04
Posts: 3910
Loc: Alabama
Yes Dotsie, that happened to me when Jennifer graduated from Chiro College. I wore Mom's wedding band that day so Mom would be close. She always encouraged Jennifer so much. As my beautiful daughter walked across the stage, I felt something from the band...it squeezed my finger(can't explain it) and I knew Mom was there. I presented Jen with the ring as a graduation gift afterwards.
Take your Mom and Nana with you in some way like I did. You will 'feel' their presence, I guarantee it. No, it is not the same as having them there, but you must have a Plan B.
I am including you in my prayers this week. I pray that all your emotions contribute precious memories that will be forever etched in your tender heart...the heart of a Mother.
Luv
chick

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#15727 - 05/31/06 02:49 PM Re: Special occasions
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
chick, thanks for this thoughtful post. I am so glad you reminded me to wear something that belonged to Mom. I often do this for the holidays, but hadn't thought to do it for the graduations.

How long ago did your daughter graduate, and how long had your mom been gone at that time?

Nana just died this past summer. She died suddenly. We honestly thought she'd be here for another 15-20 years because her dad lived until he was 93. We were shocked.

Mom has been gone for 5 years.

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#15728 - 06/01/06 03:40 AM Re: Special occasions
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
We never know when God will call us home. He has his master plan for each one of us. I think thats why I try to make the most of each and every day and let those I love know they are loved.

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#15729 - 06/01/06 08:48 AM Re: Special occasions
AvalonBlondi Offline
Member

Registered: 11/07/05
Posts: 1096
Loc: West Chester ,PA
I know how you are feeling Dotsie...my Mother said to me.."I want to live long enough to see all of your kids married and settled and to watch the look on your face the first time you hold your first Grandchild.."...she didn't live long enough for any of those things (I'm still not a grandmother and only one of my 4 kids is married)...so oftentimes I feel like I let my Mother down....and other times I feel so cheated going to so many happy family events without her...it weighs heavily...and I haven't found anything yet that helps ease the hurt....

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#15730 - 06/03/06 05:51 PM Re: Special occasions
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
Blondi, there's nothing wrong with feeling your loss. I think it's healthy to a point. As long as we don't dwell on it.

Chick, I wore one of Mom's pins and one of Nana's breacelets to my son's graduation. It felt so good. Thanks for the suggestion. Now all I have to do is remember to do it again for my daughter's graduation tomorrow.

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#15731 - 06/07/06 04:46 AM Re: Special occasions
lionspaaw Offline
Member

Registered: 11/28/02
Posts: 887
Loc: SW Florida
Dotsie - As smart women and Christians we tell ourselves that our loved ones are with us in spirit, but the child in us doesn't always "get that" and wants to physically touch them -- especially during special times -- so it's natural for that tear or two to drop

I'm glad you wore your special jewelry -- I'm sure they appreciated it too [Wink]

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