I've been thinking about this whole argument topic for days now. My husband and I have rarely flat out argued. We certainly have our disagreements that we discuss and we know the other is disgusted, but we don't yell and scream or carry on for long. We say why we are hurt, or why we think the kids should or shouldn't do such and such and come to a compromise most times. Interesting point is that when we do this our kids have told us to STOP ARGUING. We perceive it as working things out and they perceive it as arguing because this is how we act when we disagree. I have told them that they have never really seen arguments like some other couples have(loud yelling and screaming, etc.)and I wonder if that is good. They might marry the wild, crazy arguing type and not be able to handle it. I have seen that break up one marriage that I am aware of.

What I have decided is that if this works for us, GREAT. However.I"ve told my kids that just because you are married to someone does not mean that you think the same and agree on everything. There are compromises one must make in a marriage and the same person shouldn't always be the one to compromise. There is no place for selfishness in a marriage.