I tend to disagree with you seek.

the hostilitie towards you is not all that intense one post, one person is not enough for that and i don't see her (mb) as being hostile to you in context of this thread. just as i see it.

perhapps and this is a suggestion, that we move this chatt to another place, as this is the welcome mat for newcommers, and perhapps the first thing they read when they get heer. Id turn and walk away if i found this.

why not start a new post someweer else about this
or
just joine in chatting as anyother member would after a disagreement between two mebers. Perhapps if you have doubts or consernes around your "saftie" pm to dostsie.

as for being too strong a personalitie for some of the other sensitive mebers, then monitor what response your getting and ask yourself if its to do with the subject matter: Should it NOT be discussed as for good reason, their is stuff best not talked about.
Also ask yourself is it your personalitie style thats hurting or offending people, since you admite you have a strong unusule style, then the more sensitive members won't be hurt either.

you get the best of both worlds and get to descuss your hard topics. get to meet good women, get to work through any personalitie style thats offending (when not subject matter)and hopefullie learn some and teach some.

good luck chosing.
no one will be gunning for you you misjudged this place.

and once again i writting this for the people just in through the door not to hush you up.

Seek, as I wrote before, I want you to stay.
And I want our dear friend Chatty to stay.

So everyone, come out of your corners and shake hands. As Chatty would say, … " let's all put our big girl panties on."

Everyone has their history and own life's book they carry with them. Each one speaks from her personal experiences, and therefore of course has her own individual perspective.

Of course, Dotsie, I can understand if you want to close the political forums, but as Eagle said…"we are continually growing and evolving here." Gee, too much of my own souls blood is in this place. We will all do our part to make it a "better" place… ( thank you Michael Jackson.)

Hey, I feel new here anyway. I got my hair cut big time, but really modern,…with slanted bangs, and pointy ends all over my head. ..Hubby asked me if the hairdresser's chair was an electric one. …
What does he know?!

Eweiss, you crack me up. An electric chair? Oh how I love his personality and wit. Too funny. I bet you look adorable. Seriously. You have that kind of smile that could wear any "do" you wanted to.

Ladies, while all of the responses past Dotsie's are certainly from the heart, well said, and I believe will help settle differences, let's not forget the message that Dotsie is sending to ALL.

IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM...............SEND DOTSIE AN EMAIL. If you can't get a response, (she runs a biz, you know?), then email ME. LET US HANDLE IT.

Please don't forget this forum is free for your use AND you are in Dotsie's house.

Now let's have some fun, shall we?

i think it is a good idea to move whatever else needs to be said on this issue to another thread.

celtic: of course you are entitled to your opinion, but instead of asking someone to change their personality style, to me it makes more sense to just "agree to disagree," with the goal to be tolerant of diversity, including diversity of personality styles. also, i can understand if you disagree as to my perceptions of hostility, but MY perceptions are still valid to me. if the issue has to do with loyalties, i can understand that. i am new here, i don't expect loyalty and at the same time i can understand that others would expect that and that others would want to give that, where they see a need.

i hope there can be room on this forum for all kinds of people with all kinds of personalty styles, opinions, beliefs, etc.

my personal take on this is that it mirrors the problem i was talking about - having to choose sides in a matter - casting one side as "good" and one side as "bad." my belief is that we all have plenty of each in personal and political matters. for me, the work is accepting what is unacceptable and bringing the unacceptable to consciousness where it can be worked with.

Since I have been singled out to be chastised by name, I, too, will not be posting.I've no idea what made this happen but it is wrong, I think. Many have posted to Seek, some much more inflamed than my few posts. I can't imagine why I should be chosen to be mentioned.

Dancer9

This is all very very strange. Something isn't quite right and I'm not exactly sure what it is. I've been trying to figure out how to make sense of it all. Here's what I've arrived at:

Even though there are many members of this forum who don't like politics, this "seek" incident is extremely political and needs to be recognized as such. Positions are being taken and members are being singled out and faulted, like chatty and dancer. But I think chatty and dancer are expressing their frustration resulting form particular attempts at communication that didn't quite succeed. I also sincerely think that chatty and dancer are two of the most sensitive and insightful women on BWS. I'm sure that the experiences they've had in the 3D world are informing the understandings that they bring to BWS.

There are many of us on here who see ourselves as "non-traditional" though we don't push the issue. seek, you see yourself as being singled out for being different and having different views. But as some have said on here, seek, it's not that your views are as different as you think and say they are, but how you go about presenting them. I'm still scratching my head about what is so different about your views, because I frankly don't see all that much. Maybe where you live, you're different. But not in my world.

Dotsie, this is your web site, and it's a very valuable one. It has done much good for a lot of people. And you do your best to keep it peaceful. Dotsie, what I think you never realized when you started this is that you have actually spawned a community -- your own real live "Sim City" with real people interacting in it, and creating traditions and norms and protocols and friendships, along with the verbal support.

I would submit that sometimes the women on here need to work things out and uncomfortable things need to be said, just like in families. I think in most families, there are those "difficult" conversations ("we think you drink too much", "whatever you do, we'll still love you, but..." kinds of converstions).

To make an analogy, if you tried to solve a problem between your own kids that cut short their reaching some kind of understanding, you would not be helping further their relationship. They have their own histories. You would only be delaying some important communicating that needs to be said in order to move forward. If you're from a family that sweeps things under the rug for the sake of peace, you don't really understand those families where everything gets aired for the sake of authentic relationships. Both types of families (and communities) can learn from each other. A community that's trying to be diverse will allow some room for this to happen.

Chatty and Dancer, I really hope you don't leave. That would be a terrible blow to this site. Dotsie, I respect that you can do what you think you must, but I also hope you don't shut down the political thread. This is an international group now and there's so much that can be learned on there. seek, I hope you don't feel like you need to cut and run, but that you can find a way to learn from and listen to others on this site as well.

I asked someone (you )to change their personalitie style....no i din't ....put that in contect and what do you get a -whole-diffrent-meaning...i did NOT ask you to change your pesonalitie style, per say it was when hurting sensitive women, perhapps the common donominater is the "one" Sometimes not but sometimes so.......said in context i said if many women are offende.

No infact heer IS THE QHOLE QUOTE. AS FOLLOWS:
Also ask yourself is it your personalitie style thats hurting or offending people, since you admite you have a strong unusule style, then the more sensitive members won't be hurt either.
SAYS QUITRE A DIFFRENT THING WHEN SEEN AS A WHOLE QUOTE.
THE REST OF THE PARAGRAPH:
you get the best of both worlds and get to descuss your hard topics. get to meet good women, get to work through any personalitie style thats offending (when not subject matter)and hopefullie learn some and teach some.

ples note the term THAT IS OFFENDING (self-judgement call). not i asking you to change it. allthough if you were picking on the women i would aske you to stop as i did so on the racisum thread! rember!
my observasion is something of what you just did above! you pick on single sentanse out of a whole post USE that to reprisent the whole other women. Arguee with her on that one point WHILE all the time beliving as if that women used that term to you...and trying to convinse the rest of us you did when they never used that term or infrinse in the first place. meanwhile ignoring whatever else was of value said to you or the descusion or to you as a person. resulting in hurt offended and misreprisented women.

In the spirite of self investment and grow as you clame to be, perhapps looking at yourself and your personalitie style in relashion to some of the more sensitive women would't be a bad thing. Considerring you will be interacting with them. Or is it just everyone else you think needs to change and not you? Is that what you are trying to teach us? I agree we all need to learn "stuff" and i will emphasise all you and I.

Hopefullie that clears up some of the confusion between you and I the distanse between what you think i said and what i actulie said

you will find out in time that some personalitie style and statments will not be tolerated...such "as i am gonna get a gun and shoot all blacks becouse they live in arizona and becouse they are black as i want arizona white"! for example that would't be tolirated Quite a few things won't be tolirated in this forum again read the rules, applie them to yourself first and formost. Then think twice about (amount of force) forcing others to change as you have declared previouslie and elsewere before posting to them.

I DO hope you get your justice, if that is what you want lol. I hope you take it as learning as justice goes two ways.

I made clear my views on descussing this her earlier. i DON'T WANT THIS DESCUSION HEER IN THIS FORUM, the welcome forum. You however do, keep me out of it as long as it is heer. that means no more commenting on anything iv said if you do not mind. Even if you do mind do not make comment of it or me in this forum again, I do have that right of choice do i not?

i hope you stay long enough for us all (including you) to work it out, come to some understanding and develop personaly I think you will be surprised with what you learn.

So much to say and so little time right now. I have to be out the door in 30 minutes and have mcuh to do before I go.

It seems to me that women are working things out here. I deleted a post because I thought calling someone a bad apple wasn't fair. I also singled out dancer in a post because my interpretation of her post was that she was setting the perimeters for the forums, and I'm the one who does that. While it's great that everyone takes ownership because we are all part of the community, I am the one who makes the final decisions. That's all there is to it. If women don't like my final decisions, I can't help that. There are too many women to try to please, and at the end of the day, I have to answer to myself... was I true to myself, and my answer remains yes.

before movibng onto the other new members wating to be welcomed again and given the attension someone in the door deserves.

i agaIN just want you dancer to not run from this, stay and see it out.
I do't want you to leave either, in fact none of the women saying they will, should go. (thats not just loyaltie either seek but it dose play a small part in things) you alreadie have a place heer on the boards and in peoples hart, this will fissle out in a fe weeks if it takes that long, stay ad watch the fizzling.

have strenth to stay and see what the "strange thing" DJ describes manifiest itself as.

the people reading and not posting due to fear plz steap forwared if you can and post, weer ever you want and again feel safe, plzs don't leave it to us noise few. lol.

I'm getting a cold so the noise you hear is sneezing...

Celtic and DJ have both rationally observed and eloquently stated what needed to be said.