I shared my thoughts with NewLeaf about this topic last week via email and since she has not posted with the same type of responses, I belive she understands the point I was trying to make. I'll leave it open with hopes that we can all carry on.

Gimster,
Love the beautician story...

oh i am a bit surprised but thanks for re-opening this dotsie...i appriaciate it and heers hoping it remains calm and godlie/godessie...thanks for giving us all the chances dotsie...

GEEZE Meredithbead, when you come back, you come back with a bang I'm sincerely sorry my words and my assurance offended you. (Hope your head feels better soon.) I can't and won't bend this way and that to make anyone feel better about themselves. I put it out there and if the shoe fits, wear it. If not then just let it go. As you can see, I'm not offended by your words. I appreciate it when people are frank and honest about their feelings. Chatty is a prime example of that. She puts it out there just the way she sees it. So does Celtic and even though we don't always agree, like two generals on the battlefield on different sides, at least I respect her for being a worthy opponent.

I've been duly and lovingly chastized but thank you for your kind reminder. I'll do my best to add my voice without offending anyone but sometimes the truth hurts. I can't help it. I didn't invent it. I just present it.

Gimster, I loved the beautician story! It was great. That's the way Christ taught also, in analogies and by asking questions. Did you ever think about that? The Pharasees and spiritual leaders were always trying to trip him up or appeal to his ego, but he didn't have an ego because he was sinless, so he just replied with questions to their wordy traps.

Thinking seems to be a lost art these days. People are more into feeling than thinking it seems, me included.

I know my feelings have been running high these days. Oh well, at least that way I know I'm alive

I've never seen a topic stir so many emotions. Honestly, I never have not even politics. Its good to know from my safe and sound location within my belief system what others believe. It makes it much easier with that knowledge to know where to meet them and help them understand the truth so they can have a better life. That's all. No proselytizing or bludgeoning.

I look at myself as that person who takes the keys away from the drunk driver before they get behind the wheel and endanger their lives or the lives of others. The person getting in the veh to drive home may object and fight vehemently with you and insist they aren't drunk afterall, just feeling good or a bit tipsy. Christ himself while on the cross said, "Father forgive them for they know not what they do." Speaking of those who had set the snare for him and finally he "allowed" them to capture him so that he could pay the ultimate price for our salvation and eternal life with the Father.

I would rather sit under the tutelige of a pastor who gets alone with God and sincerely from his/her heart hears from God what his/her congregation needs to hear for their healing, happiness, peace and well being. I've never had a lot of respect for the three topic and sermonettes retrieved from a book of sermons. I could go to the public library and check one of them out myself.

Anyway, I'm glad this thread is still open. It's interesting although volitile

I'll tell Daddy how much the story was enjoyed and tell him thanks. That will lift his spirits, knowing he's shared something of value.
NL, at posting, I didn't relate it to Jesus' parables, but thanks for pointing that out. It's true.

Here's a little saying from Aunt Oma, "Never find fault with what's been said or done, unless you're the one who said or done it."
We need to apply this to our lives, right?
Blessings to all who have participated in this discussion.

Mustang, I am so sorry you had such an experience in your divorce recovery group. A friend of mine used to lead such a group and confidentiality is a must!

I have been away from the church due to bad experiences with church people. I know in my head that there is sin in the church and that I should be as cautous there as anywhere else. But my heart hurt for a long time. The church attracts the walking wounded and sinners, not only people who are perfect.

I had been looking for a small group for a couple of years and just recently found one. I ran into an old friend at church and I joined his cell group. That group split because it was getting too large and now we only have 4, which is perfect for now.

I hope you won't give up on finding a group. I didn't, and even though it took a long time, it has filled a gap in my life.

I'm glad the thread is open again, although I understand that it raises a great many emotions. One of the ways that I find useful is to believe, even though the author might not say it, that what they are saying is from their perspective and belief. I can take what I like and leave the rest, which I think is what NL means when she says, "I put it out there and if the shoe fits, wear it. If not then just let it go."

Since her belief system and mine are very different, I love her and let it go. It works. :-))

Thank you Casey. I appreciate that. I'm going to be looking for a divorce recovery group at my church real soon. Even though I know splitting up is the best thing to do, its still like recovering from major surgery for me.

When I married my husband, it was before God, and with my whole heart. I took my vows seriously. I became one with my husband and now that one unit is being torn apart by him and, I guess, by me also as I have no choice.

The deep nearly mortal wounds will take time and intensive care to heal. As many of you may remember some of my post regarding our sex life have been very favorable. I'll miss that also. I feel like a failure in that department now too.

thanks for keeping this descusion and this forum safe for us all dotsie regardless of religon denominasion, no religion, alternative religion, lifestyle etc etc etc...i sincerlie appriate your efforts.

TO GIVE AN EXAMPLE IF I MAY
i belive with all my hart certine things, my mind belives it and i have witnessed it so for me its totalie true ....but i accept that it wont be this way for all others or even most others.

So i can hold in balances, MY total belife being totalie true for ME...while for another THEIR belife is totalie true for THEM.

There is no fault with or from either of us but the fault occures when i excalme that my belife has to "BE SO"... for everyone elses. For example, "If you don't belive as i do then your wrong for doing so". More than just i think your wrong but you are ultimitlie wrong .

its a sutile wee diffrences but an important one on the forum but also in life generallie.

As most things are its just a balancing act lanague wise, and respect wise.....and one can also respect anothers belifes for what they are (trulie respect them) without them dilouting first persons belifes, (NL belifes need not change or lessen in strenth). Its a freedom thing, a non-judmental thing and an act of genuine respect...

NL may belive with her whole hart that her way is the ultimate truth, and for that their is nuthing verie wrong, but onlie when they are imposed or forced on another dose it become a wrong thing to do, due to, lack of respect and not that the belife is wrong...

NL with her deep held belife has an oppetunitie to learn this (as people with deep belifes often need to do)and it may take a bit of practices but it is achivable....as it is only a change in attitude not in her belifes....thanks for giving NEWLEAF the chances to do this.

As in life most things take practices...As one practices then correction is necassary, at times, to ensure the right path and the right way for the future. Thats the process , do, correction, readjustment,do again, evaluasion and so on.

You know this is such an important life skill your doing NL a great favour and NL you setting an example for manie woman to follow who has similare habits. Those that may have grasped it, again get to evaluate their own behaviour so we all evolve and advances as one....

cheers dotsie and "respect" to the two of you for engaging in this....

(hope that aint to fluffie or overbearing as i still grogie from the opp)

you know what ladies , its all good heer thanks again. love and hugs to you all...