I came by that thinking naturally. My parents would have rathered I stayed in an abusive marriage than get a divorce. I'm sure it was an embarrassment to them that I was getting, yet, another divorce. But, there is nothing like the fear of being killed to make you leave and even my shrink told me he was afraid I'd end up with a broken neck because my husband would pick me up by the throat/neck and throw me into walls. But you know what? When you are living in that fear and soon after the abuse, a victim tends to minimize the horror of it. She forgets how scared she was and the pain she felt. The fear of the unknown outweighs the fear of another incident of abuse.

Dotsie, I have found that women my age seem to be afraid of what others think than the younger women. Maybe it's a generational thing that we've yet to overcome. But, after therapy and at the age of 47, I stopped caring about it. I've heard that hitting the age of 50 will do it so I guess I was an early bloomer.