That's just sad.

LSmith5434, there aren't many words to express the way I feel for you. Wasted years, years we can never get back. Why do you say he never loved you? Why did you get married to him then? If you prefer not to answer these questions thats okay, I understand. If its humanly possible don't waste one more second on this man, you can be happy alone or with friends who do love you. I have been alone now a long while and am past 60 and happy as hell. I am even dating a lovely man for dinners and excursions. We are silly like kids sometimes but not intimate, my choice and he knew that from the get-go. There is time to make a happy life for yourself. I can feel your frustration in what you've written and am so sorry....I would say Happy Anniversary but it would be inappropriate I guess.

[ November 29, 2005, 10:42 PM: Message edited by: chatty lady ]

chatty lady......Don't mind answering your questions. I have to tell you I love the way you are so up front with your responses to all our problems here in BWS. I just love you for it!
After all the marriage couselling, we discoveredthat we never were in love. I married him because I wanted away from my very physically and abuse mother. He was lonely living by himself. I ended up marrying my mother. He's never been physically abusive, but he's just like my mother when it comes to running me down.
Right now......Everything is running so well. I'm doing my best to just get on with my life now that I'm well enough to do that, and just wait for him to decide to retire and move up to "his place." When that happens, we will sit down and talk about what I WANT from him. If he doesn't want to make me a partner in this marriage, and start believing that "his money" is my money also, and isn't willing to work out some kind of working arrangement with me, then it will be a divorce.
Like you said.....it was very hard for me yesterday to think about 41 wasted years, but I can't think that way, or I'd really go crazy.
I think more of it as having two beautiful daughters out of this marriage who presented me with four beautiful grandsons.
Two of them are with us until Thursday. My youngest and her hubby went to Las Vegas. Their first time away from the six year old and the 22 month old!
So.....I just go thru some badtimes,and I guess that's why I joined this group so I could just get my feelings out.
I truly thank you and everyone for your thoughts.
I pray that everything will work out, and we can get on with our lives, and just sit back and watch our grandsons grow into beautiful young men.
Love to you all
Lynne