I found this site in the AARP bulletin. No idea what to expect, except that the name grabbed me -BoomerWomen! That's definitely me. Just looking for someone to talk to in my age group.
I'm married, have 2 sons, 3 stepdaughters and a stepson, 16 grandchildren and 2 cats (one named Boomer). I work as a secretary in a hospital - love it. For many years I made porcelain dolls, but they take up a lot of room so I stopped that. I paint-watercolors, write, read, crochet, bake, work out, garden, sew costumes. Lots of interests.

Wow Pattycake...you do it all! Now I know who to come to for crochet advice. Welcome!

JJ

Welcome Pattycake! JJ's right - you DO lead a busy life.....I spent 20 years working in Administration in two different hospitals - I too loved my work. I'm now retired and loving that even better! LOL

I have a cat named Sam, love to garden, read, write, AND paint (mostly oils). We definitely share some interests and that's something you will find as you get to know the girls here - we all seem to share a lot....makes for a GREAT time when you visit the forum.

Welcome and happy holidays.

Great goings on Pattcake, welcome and you have found your newest hobby. I must warn you we are an addictive group and once inside you'll never want to leave...Merry Christmas

Welcome Pattycake...that childhood rhyme is running through my mind right now. Is that the source of your name? Just wondering...

I like to refinish antique furniture, read, spend time in the garden, and here lately bake...whew!

I'm married, 2 daughters, 3 sons, 3 dogs, 1 grandson and a new teenage granddaughter...oh and a to-be-son-in-law.

After working for years and years...I now just spend my days at home.

Merry Christmas to you and yours!

Welcome from me too Pattycake.....
I worked for 30 years in a hospital. I did everything except brain surgery.
Had to leave because of medical problems, now I don't want to go back.
I live in Olympia, Wa. and yes it's raining!
Merry Christmas....and you really will get addicted to this place.
Lynne

Welcome, Pattycake,

I do volunteer work in a hospital. I'm married, 2 grown kids (29 and 27) but no grandchildren. I was a teacher for many years before I retired 4 years ago because of health problems. We have a cat named Cha-Cha.

Like many others, I'm addicted to this forum.

Merry Christmas Pattycake! This site is incredibly fun and addictive as one of us already mentioned.

Pattycake, welcome to the neighborhood.I hope you'll pop in other forums and let us get to know you. Where in Connecticut are you?

Welcome, Pattycake! Let me echo Dotsie in encouraging you to pop into the other forums. I'm from CT, too. How long have you lived here?

You are one busy person! Welcome!

Donna

Hey Pattycake, did you used to post on the Womans Day forum a few years or so ago? I did too. your description of yourself sounded familiar. But maybe it's not you. I posted under nancy_mom then. My how time flies when you aren't looking!

storylady

I'm new too! Just saw the description for this website in the AARP bulletin. It sounded very interesting so I checked it out.
I'm single - now. I have two daughters and 4 grandchildren.
I work as an assistant to the CEO of a company.
Am looking forward to exploring this great site some more and "meeting" more of you.
Kats Meow

I love your name Kats Meow!
Welcome to the boomer women forums!

Hi,

I love your name too. Welcome to Boomerland.

Hey KatsMeow!
Welcome to a great place to visit once in a while. Did I say that?
You'll be visiting all the time!
I'm originally from Eureka, Ca. Been to San Jose many times.
Lynne

Welcome Pattycake, storylady and Kats meow!
Glad to have you all among us! Here's wishing you all a great 2006! God bless!

[ January 31, 2006, 08:06 PM: Message edited by: Songbird ]

Welcome to all the newbies....
Our family here, is growing in leaps and bounds.
That's so nice.

Hello I'm a newbie also. I am a divorced woman living on my own with one grown child and two grandchildren, I adore. I have been married 3 times and divorced 3 times so I have pretty much given up on the love scene. It is really hard to maintain everything to keep up with it these days. I live in the northern lower peninsula of Michigan. Just checking this site out as it sounded pretty interesting. If there is anyone with similar life events please write if you want. Need a friend desperately. Bonny

[ January 04, 2006, 07:31 PM: Message edited by: Bonny ]

Hi Bonny! I love your name. Welcome to the best forum on the internet for Boomer women.
I don't have similar life events as I have 1 husband (25 years), 8 kids and 1 grandchild. But there may be other things we have in common. I'm
46, a Catholic, I love to read, walk, laugh, I like birds and I like to talk.
Enjoy it here. I know you will.

Oh Bonny...

You will find plenty of friends here...I also needed a friend desperately when I landed here.
All these wonderful women have added a whole new dimension to my life.
You will not find another place like BWS, anywhere.
Your where your suppose to be...find a forum post as much as you want. Tell us more about you.
Glad your here.

[ January 04, 2006, 08:04 PM: Message edited by: yepthatsme2 ]

Welcome Bonny! I see from your profile that you like stained glass. How did you learn this craft? I've always thought that would be soooo neat to learn. You go girl!

Welcome to the forum and just for the record, I'm a divorcee of 14 years (almost 15) and I love being single. The only thing I miss is his paycheck...LOL!

Glad you found us! JJ

Welcome Bonny....
I came to this wonderful place with divorce on my mind after 40 years of marriage.
Have had so many ladies give me their honest opinions, and made many friends.
You will find your place here in Boomerland!
The divorce thing is on the shelf for now.
Enjoy this place.
Lynne

Say Bonny!

My best friend of 30 years is named Bonnie. Welcome. I'm a divorcee of well, I'd have to take out the calculator. Since 1976, however, many years that is....o, now that I see it, I'm guessing 30 years also!!!!

Searcher

Bonny,
I say my three failed marriages were just practice for the one I'm in now. Hey, I'm a slow learner.

This fourth one just sneaked up on me. And so far (almost 3 yrs.) it's been a blast.

However, that is not to say everyone should be married. You'll find happily single and happily married unhappily single and unhappily married and about to be married and about to be single here and most of them will become friends.

It's a great place for just hanging out.

Welcome.

smile

Smile,

That's too funny!!!! And also true!

Welcome Bonny...
Who among us didn't need a friend when
we first checked out this forum?? Welcome and you have absolutely come to the best place...whether you find one friend or one thousand...you won't be disappointed....I hope you stay for awhile and try us out....

Glad you found us Bonny. If you need a friend you just found a LOT of them here on this forum! Hope you enjoy getting to know us as I'm sure we will enjoy getting to know you. Many topics to explore, many things to learn and share.....WELCOME!

Welcome to Bonny and Kats Meow...

Geez, so many fun newbies. I can't wait to learn more about you. Please jump in te other fourms and begin sharing away.

Thank you all so much for responding. Do any of you feel like a failure at life (especially you who have been married more than once)? I am embarassed to tell anyone that I have been married three times. I think it is always my fault most of the time. Maybe it is some of the upbringing or that my dad was an alkie and drank like a fish. Or maybe it was because I was molested by my brother when I was 4 years old repeatedly until the age of around 10 years old. Or maybe it was just that I felt my mother cared more for my older siblings than I. She still loves my incestuous brother like ther is no tomorrow. Or should I just keep telling myself not to blame everything on my upbringing and take control of my own life?

Boy does this sound depressing or what? Anyhow you can see what goes around in my mind alot.

Well thanks and talk to you later. Bonny

You're not blaming it on your upbringing so much as living the effects of it. You've been treated so badly and no one should have to endure what you have. You're not a failure. You have been looking for real love, no one can blame you for that.
(((HUGS)))

Thanks Bluebird.

Oh Bonny,

Do you have a way of getting some professional help? These problems that you have had in your life, I believe require more than what we are able to provide.....These are very serious = I have concern for you....

You are NOT a failure, and all those things you mentioned surely affect your choices in men!!! And remember, Elizabeth Taylor was married, well, I can't remember HOW many times, so you are in good company...there are many, many, many others as well..... You really need some help here, I feel so badly for your self-image. Of course you need to take control of your life, but that's not an easy thing to do, especially under your circumstances...Let us know what you are feeling.......And take courage! Even these things can be worked out for you!!!!

Searcher

There you go, Bluebird, couldn't be better said....And in so fewer words!!!!

Welcome new boomers!

Good grief Bonny, don't feel bad for 3 failed marriages. It happens. All the time. The real losers are those men who lost you. I once wore my failed marriages like old rags and like you I was ashamed, but now I wear them like a badge of courage. I'm proud to have survived and now I'm going to thrive.

I say divorces are like having bought the wrong car parts. The exes just didn't fit. The way I see it, I'm a Cadillac and they were Fords so they were the wrong parts.

For a long time I felt like a failure because of being married several times, but my present husband says it's just cause I'm so cute that men can't resist me and I can't make up my mind. (But he's prejudiced--And goofy)

Eventhough you apparently came from a terrible background, the horrible part is over now except as a memory to learn from. And just look at all you've accomplished. Despite what you have endured, three men found you irresistable. You have a great family and you don't need a husband to be complete. Your children are helping you, your grandchildren love you, and what more is there? Grandchildren are the best.

You say you have given up on the love scene, but there's a lot of love in the world and most of it doesn't come from men. It sounds like love is all around you in your children and grandchildren. Revel in it. If another guy comes along, wear your marriages like the learning experiences they were. The guys who lost you are the ones to be embarrassed and ashamed.

If you need professional help, I hope you get it, but either way, there's people here to befriend and encouragage you.

I'm saying a prayer for you this very night.

smile

Bonny, welcoome to BWS. You will find a lot to talk about here, and many women who care. I had a childhood similar to yours, including being molested by my older brother. I had low self-esteem and feelings of failure too. However, in the last 5 years I was able to take charge of my life through counseling (for one thing.) It no longer matters to me what my mother's relationship to my brother is. That is not my business, so I don't get bitter about it. What matters most is my relationship with myself and my relationship with God. You will find your way. You can start by thinking of what you achieve. I started small. I used to consider myself successful if I got out of bed that day. I was super successful if I got out of bed and then made the bed. I am available via private messaging if you would prefer. Love and Light, Lynn

Hello to Kats Meow too. That is a great screen name!

Bonny...

My dad went to work each and every day...but starting on Fridays he was in the local bar spending (some weeks)all of his paycheck. We were the only people I knew who had a new coffee table every week, he wasn't a happy drunk.
You could find supper thrown all over the kitchen walls...because it wasn't fresh and warm like first cooked.
My mother was either slapped, flung into walls, punched or walked around with protruding black eyes all the time. I was told weekly, how much he hated me, and I knew to stay out of his way. Most of the time you could find me crouched in the closet.
It wasn't my brother who molested me, it was a uncle.
When your brought up in this kind of environment, it's all you really know.

My first marriage lasted 13 years...he drank like a fish, verbally abusive. At first he tried smacking and hitting on me. Too many years had passed watching my mom being beat down ...it wasn't going to happen.
I remember grabbing a kitchen knife when he came at me and backing him into a corner, knife held to his throat. Told him if he ever touched me again....I would run him through...if I couldn't do it then, I would do it while he slept. He never touched me again...think he thought I was a crazy woman.
Might have been...I was fed up with that life. We had 4 kids and I didn't want them to have to see or go through what I had during my childhood.

I went through many, many years of therapy, and believe me you it helps.
Took me a year and a half just to be able to leave my husband.
When you are brought up in an abusive situation it's all you really know...mine was so dysfunctional.
As a child...I thought everyone had the same life, I did. Never realized they didn't till I was older.
When I did decide to move on and include another man in my life I prayed for God to send me someone totally different than my dad, or ex husband.
He did...I am so thankful.

Your not a failure...you need to seek help so you can heal. Let someone show you how to love your self. You have already taken the first step...by telling others.
I did it for myself and my children.
I wanted the abuse to stop here...right here.
Someone has to put an end to it all...why not us???

I just want you to know...your not alone.
PM me anytime you need to talk.

Bonny ,
Please Talk to Lynnie . Her book is wonderful and a private message will help . She has helped a lot of us girls on this site . Please give her a talk .

[ January 06, 2006, 12:15 AM: Message edited by: Nancy50 ]

Bonny,

Seems to me that you're not to blame, but a lot of nasty dysfunctional people in your life are. As a child, you were helpless to stop the abuse so you internalized the pain and blamed yourself. In order to blame the real culprits, you would have had to think about them and what they did, and I know that was way too painful.

You're not a failure, but you're still learning and need to define yourself and life according to YOU and not any past idiots and the trauma they inflicted. I can't remember whose quote this is, but a failure isn't someone who makes mistakes; it's someone who quits trying. Don't give up on life.

Love your child and grandchildren. Learn to love yourself. Don't worry about having a man in your life. Being married is no indicator of success.

Smilinize, I love your attitude!

Warm fuzzies to all you wise women who are so willing to help Bonny. I love each and every one of you.

And Bonny too.

Bonny, as you can see, there are so many women on here and in the world who have gone through what you have endured. Abuse of all kinds is such an awful epidemic in our country.

It seems as if it never completely leaves you. But with God in your heart you are an overcomer. You are so much stronger than you realize. Even finding the strength to post on here is an example of your innter strength.

What has happened to you is a horrible fact and it will be in your deepest memories forever, but it is not 'who you are.' You are most of all, a child of God and His love is always with you. When you are at your weakest, He will be at your side to comfort you. And He has the ability to take even the most awful thing and turn it into a miracle of love.

I am praying for a miracle in your life today.

smile

[ January 06, 2006, 02:26 PM: Message edited by: smilinize ]

Bonny,

I just wanted to add an amen to all the things the wonderful women here have already told you. Although I do not come from a background like yours, I suffered from severe depression that made me think of myself as a failure for a long time.

With help and love, you can bring yourself to a better place. Hard work, but worth it. I'm always here to listen.

Hugs,

Thank you all so much. Some days are good but like one said it will always be in my mind and I will always wonder why. I have been to counselors and haven't had alot of success except that they want me to take antidepressants. I am always trying to not feel victimized because I know some people have had alot more terrible things happen than I. My deceased sister (she was molested also) once said her life was so bad but I think everyone has their problems.
My Mom is living with me for the winter and to tell you the truth I can't wait for her to go back to her own home. I have always felt she didn't really love me and that it was just some kind of front she was putting on. She drank some with my Dad back years ago.
I do love my daughter and her husband and the grandkids. I am more proud of them than any other thing in the world. My granddaughter is so sweet and smart and I just want to protect her so much from some of the things that happened to me.
Thanks again for all your input and God Bless you all. Bonny

Nancy, thank you for the vote of confidence. I am always glad to help. Yep, I am so sorry for what you endured, yet proud of you for knowing that you were going to break the cycle, no matter what. Bonny, do you object to taking anti-depressants? I swear, the newer anti-ds (Zoloft, Celexa) have been a life-saver for me. I doubt if I ever would have survived and overcome all that I have without them. Ant-ds helped me to get the help I needed from counseling. Trauma does stay on the mind, like a scar on the skin, but you can move through it. I too had trying times with my mother, feeling like she did not really love me and was unable to protect me. I'm glad for you that you have your daughter and grandkids to be proud of. That means that you too broke a cycle of dysfunction. To me, that spells success for future generations. Love and Light, Lynn

[ January 06, 2006, 10:33 PM: Message edited by: Lynnie ]

Lynn, As a matter of fact I have taken zoloft, prozac, wellbutrin, etc. They do help. I finally went back to prozac as it seems to do the job as well as the others. There are still some days when I just wonder what the heck.
Have you ever felt like everyone around you was so happy and had such a perfect life?
And you know what else? All my divorces have been of my own doing. First one I left and ran away to California when I was just 20 with another man. Second one was an abuser and he couldn't keep his zipper done up. Third one was a good man, hard worker and successful and all and I blew that one too, leaving him for someone else. And in between time there have been boyfriends (lots) but now for the last 3 years I have not been with a man at all. I never felt like any of them really loved me as I felt love should have been but anyway ........
That is why I don't think love is in my agenda anymore. As much as I want it so badly.
I cannot afford any counseling as I am just keeping ahead of the game paying my mortgage etc.
Anyway maybe if I keep talking here it will help some. And thanks for listening. Bonny

Hi Bonny, it sounds like you have been "through the wringer" in the romance department. You wrote, "I never felt like any of them really loved me as I felt love should have been " which is almost the same thing as you wrote about your mother. Bonny, I don't want to push the counseling issue (or do I?) but there are a lot of agencies that offer services on a system based on your income or for no charge at all. The YWCA where I worked in women's resources offered counseling at no charge to anyone at anytime. I went about 5 years between the ex and the current husband, fully expecting never to marry again. I even told the man I have been married to since 1988 "I've been married before and I will never get married again." Famous last words. I had to find some way to love myself first, even if I wasn't in love with myself, I had to learn to love my soul, and to love myself as a child of God. I had to learn that as a child of God I was worthy of love in simple pure forms. Talking here does help. Have you had a chance to check out the other forums? Love and Light, Lynn

Smile truer words were never spoken....

Smile....."Love is an unpredictable thing. It just does its own thing, and I'm not sure anyone ever loves us the way we think love should be."
Wow!!! That really hit home with me.
Thank you....it really opened my eyes to make me realize I'm to much of a romantic and need to get back down to earth.
Lynne

Smile wrote: "I'm not sure anyone ever loves us the way we think love should." My husband loves me better, more, deeper, richer, and fuller than I think anyone should or could or would. I am constantly astounded at his measure of love. There was a song in the 80's: "I want to know what love is, and I want you to show me" by Journey (I think) (recently sung by Wynonna Judd) and my girlfriend said to me, "That's your song, and W (my now husband) is the one showing you.) Yes, he has shown me what love is. I could never have guessed what love should be or look like or feel like. When it came to me, I almost didn't recognize it because I had never experienced it before. I can honestly say that my husband loves me in the way that I think love should be. And God am I ever grateful!

I do believe there are times when a marriage fails that it is 1 person's fault. And that is when cheating or abuse is involved. People don't have to cheat, even when there are other problems, but when they do, it's washing their hands of the marriage.

For instance, my first husband cheated and I couldn't do anything to get him back into the marriage. Then my 2nd one was verbally abusive. My fault was in the choosing and when I date someone, it's up to me to discern the true character of the man - not an easy task.

Bonny, I had a disfunctional childhood also and I'm sure that led to my bad decisions concerning love. I'm far from perfect now, but through counseling and reading, I have a better idea about the reasons for my choices and hopefully, I won't repeat my mistakes. I also encourage you to find a counselor. Some churches have counseling centers that charge based on your income. There are also some great books that have helped me also.

I believe there is hope for you - and me too!

Daisygirl

Bibliotherapy: that's a term used to describe books that can be used as helpful in gaining insight into our behaviors. If you go to my website (see link on the "house" above the post here) you will find a recommendations page at my website of books that are helpful in the areas that we are talking about. A crappy childhood does not give us a good foundation for making good decisions. Here's one of my favorite quotes: "Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice. It is a not a thing to be waited for, it is something to be achieved." I had to learn that my parents' and siblings abusive behavior was not a blueprint for my life, that I could choose my own destiny. As Maya Angelou says, when I knew better, I did better. Yes, Daisygirl, and everyone, there is hope for all of us. Love and Light, Lynn

[ January 08, 2006, 02:22 PM: Message edited by: Lynnie ]

What a powerful statement Lynnie, I agree with you 100 percent.

Sherri

The comment about everyone else having a perfect life reminded me of a book I learned about in church yesterday, Everybody's Normal Until You Get to Know Them. It sounds like a good one doesn't it?

Excellent quote, Dotsie. I've never figured out what normal is.

It does sound like a good book.
Like Jackie...I'm not sure there is a normal, were all so unique.

I think the majority of us had dysfunctional childnoods in one way or another, and that's why were are drawn together here. We were raised in an era of trying to please our parents - something I still haven't stopped trying to do. Mine was emotional and mental abuse. Everyone else was always smarter, prettier, more clever, had a better personality - and that kind of thing being drummed into you lasts forever, just as the memories of the physical abuse you endured continue to affect your life. And then I married a man who did the same thing to me and my children. In public I was his 'beautiful wife' - he bragged about my housekeeping, my cooking, my mothering, my promotions at work. But at home - he wouldn't let me do anything other than the ones listed above - I ceased to exist. When I finally got the nerve up to divorce him (after 34 years of marriage and the kids were established on their own) he exercised his last act of controlling my life by committing suicide. The letter he left behind was proof, saying he could not survive without me, his only love. I will never get over it, and will always feel responsible, though I am better. You are most certainly not alone, Bonny. I never wanted to get involved with another man, either, but one appeared like a miracle and we have been married 4 years. We get better - people like you and I and the other wonderful ladies who have written to you - by talking about our history, learning we are not alone, and validating each other. I'm so sorry you've had to go through so much, but so very happy you are with us now. We also share lots of good things! I wish I lived in MI - I'd love to meet you and give you a hug! Let's talk more. And I apologize for one long paragraph - it's late, I'm typing fast, and have to get up for work soon, so I'd better get to bed!

Dreamer

I bought the book, Everybody's Normal Until You Get to Know Them. I'll let you know if it's any good.

Dreamer, I enjoy reading your story. Your proof that their is a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. I am so sorry for what you and your children had to endure with your first husband. You poor things. But I am so grateful you have found true love. Carry on dear woman...

Years ago I read a book about what normal is, because I honestly didn't know. Really, it was more about what is abusive or unhealthy behavior because we all know normal is a relative term.

I'll have to find your book Dotsie.

Daisygirl

Dotsie,
I will check that book out at Borders. There is one I really like , that I finished reading . "Too Soon Old, Too Late Smart . It is a small book . The author is Gordon Livingston,MD a writer and doctor from here where we live .

Dotsie , who is the author of that book?

[ January 20, 2006, 10:05 PM: Message edited by: Renee ]

John Ortberg is the author. I bought it, but haven't gotten to it yet.

Guess I'll just jump right in. I'm a 56 yr. old widow. Husband died 10/01,MIL died 11/01, SIL died 1/02, dad died 2/02, etc. X 15. I'm still in shock over all the losses. Haven't had a paying job since 03 & my money pool is getting VERY shallow. I have NO idea what I want to do for the rest of my life. I've been a caregiver for 40 years. I am now a lost soul. I'm thinking of selling my home of 40 years & moving to Kentucky to be near a cousin & other family. My 27 yr. old son (dyslexic) hates the idea. I'm sorry if I'm rambling but I have so much to deal with I'm not sure where to start.Can anyone suggest any ideas as to how to begin this rebirth? HELP!

First of all WELCOME friend to the home of the Boomers. I see in your posts such turmoil from loss. It seems to me 'everything new' might be the best answer for you. Selling the home, moving to a new fresh and lovely area near family and friends. Making new friends, maybe getting a new job and an interest in new things outdide the home. It seems to me you have no where to go but UP! Do not let your son or anyone else hold you back. This is your time for life having been a caregiver for all those years. Many of our ladies here have written marvelous books on just this subject and I am hoping they might jump in and share the titles so you too can read them and see how 56 can be the beginning. Good luck and hey, you'll love it here.

Hi Sugarbabe...

Sorry to hear of all the loses you have endured.
Sounds as if your ready to move forward and not sure which way to turn yet.
Think we have all be there at one time or another.

Glad, to hear you are wanting to be closer to family...your son probably wouldn't like the idea of mom not being around, that's normal.
But, you have to do what is going to make sugarbabe happy...not everyone else.
It will give your son a spot to vacation and visit mom.

Do what you want to do... you've earned that right.
Want a part-time job, get one. Like to volunteer, go for it. Want to move...find the packing boxes.
Ask yourself what you like to do...and do it, the best you know how. One foot in front of the other and moving.

Your lost no longer, you have a home now...right here.

Welcome.

Sugarbabe,your rebirth began when you 'jumped right in' and started writing. I can't tell you how much this place has helped me. New beginnings are very theraputic, and you made a good start by coming here.

My first husband committed suicide shortly after my present husband and I married. (I stayed in touch with him almost daily from the time he finally moved out until just before he died - took him food - it's a long story, and my new husband was wonderful, supportive and understanding - the suicide was devastating to me.) I couldn't bear to be in the city where I'd spent 34 years living with him, loving him, and being unable to do enough to make him happy. Even though my Dad (I'm an only child) was suffering from a tragic and rare terminal illness, my dear second husband and I moved from Denver, CO to Seneca, SC - I sold my house (my dream home - I still miss the structure, but not the memories)left my Mom and my sick Dad, my daughter, son-in-law and then 2 year old grandson - and we moved. We moved in September and my Dad died December 11 (2003). I flew back and forth twice, then flew to Denver a 3rd time and spent the last 5 weeks of my Dad's live living in my parents' home with them to help. But after all that I was able to come back here and begin to get well. I don't think I could have made it if we'd stayed in Denver. So from my experience, I urge and encourage you to start over in a new place - you have all of us behind you now, and we will always be here for you.

I will be most happy - even honored - to talk you through it. I honestly think it is the only way to come to terms with things. It still hurts, and you never forget, but you are able to gain a new perspective, re-discover yourself and each day find something, no matter how small, to keep you going.

Dotsie, thank you so much for your kind words and understanding - that means so much.

Sugarbabe, you are a strong, intelligent woman and there is nothing you cannot do!

Dreamer

To chattylady,yepthatsme2 & dreamer I just want to thank you all for the words of encouragement you sent my way. I needed those words today most of all. I worked for a bank for 5 yrs and balanced on a daily basis. Today is the 8th day of trying & I can't even balance my checkbook. Lord, do I feel stupid. I know I'm not but I feel it. Somedays are better than others.
As John Denver said in one of his songs;
"Some days are diamonds; some days are stones."
I think today is a stone day. Looking for the diamonds to come my way.

Can't speak for everyone else but, I have my share of "stone days".
As far as the checkbook goes, I use the duplicate checks, and online banking. Have to find all the tools I can...otherwise I wouldn't come any where close to balancing.
Most trouble I have is when hubby doesn't write his bank credit card purchase's down.
Glad to see you back.

Yep

Hi Sugarbabe,
I've been offline for about 2 weeks - I work during tax season and am having a hard time getting used to my new schedule!

How are you doing now? You are the first one I've checked on since getting into the forums today - I've been thinking about you, and hope things are looking up. Please report asap! I hope today is a diamond for you!

Dreamer