Di, you are genuine. But honestly when a stranger or someone I barely know, I simply say fine..and talk about something.

If it is someone I know as a good friend and family, I do ask how they are and hope they ask that out of me. Usually they do. My response for tough times in life, I just say could be better, but I'm alive or something to that effect. Details are reserved for time and right place.

I agree with Kathy and Dotsie. This is a great question Celtic! I bet if I asked that to some people I know, it would stop them in their tracks.

When I’m asked that question, I always say fine…no matter how I feel. I see the question as another way of saying hello, especially in America.

They don't ask that question as much in Germany. People tend to take it too literally.

the how are you thing heer being ment or not is trickie and complaceted furtheir by others personal desclusure habits.

L can be in floods of tears and I ASK HIM how he is and he says "cool how are you"...at 5 he knows its a retorical question. thats what he's picked up about the greetings we give to each other and its hi and how are you....not meaning it and a same response. We are working on the real no how are you lol especialie when he's crying.

the diffrense heer is when its about close frends or a place that allows for more seriouse chatting...then the "how you" is about how are you , reallie....

saying all that some people who are aqantinses do tell all, when its just a "conversasional hi how you" polite greeting....someone else mentioned it but i also think its about no one listening to them or thirs no other way for them to express whats going on thats hurting them.

As long as i have time i do listen regardless of what way i originalie ment the "hows you"

Around here, it is just an add on to the hello. "Hi, how are ya?"

In the past, I have been considered a great listener. Lately, I have been guilty, often, of being self-absorbed and forgetting to check in on the other person.

Thanks for the reminder.

EW, if you don't ask people how they're doing when you greet them, what do you ask? Just curious...

Dotsie, It's usally more specific if you know them. Like you ask how are your parents or children. Usually you start with the present...Like you see someone and you say,"Are you going shopping?" Or "What are you doing here?" Sometimes you just say, "It's great to see you again and say hello to everyone!" If you ask them how they are, then ... pull up a chair.

I don't know about others, but I say all sorts of things to people when I see them besides 'How are you?' The casualness or silliness of the greeting depends on the setting and on how well I know someone (and sometimes, how much of a hurry I'm in). Crowded place: "Oh, hi. I can't believe we all wound up here at once." Or, "did they send a memo telling everyone to show up at the Wal-Mart?" Beastly weather: "Hi. Oh, my gosh, the streets are flooding." General: "Hi. Great minds think alike!" "Hi, nice to see you."

If I sat and thought for awhile I could probably come up with a lot more, and yes, I do ask people how they are doing or how their weekend went if I know them well. Otherwise, probably not.

Oh, excuse the double post, please: brain fart!

Yeah, liked "How's (insert place, company etc) treating you?" Or, "What's your latest project/hobby?"