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#185124 - 06/25/09 01:13 AM
Not introducing self to BWSM
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Registered: 01/21/07
Posts: 3675
Loc: British Columbia, Canada
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Have noticed occasionally people who post with a specific question but they don't introduce themselves at all in a meaningful way. When the person has only 1 post..the question that they are posing.
Life is short, I'm not wasting online time to respond with people haven't yet recognized online forum etiquette of self-introduction to a community online group with members who post and read often. It is helpful to all of us. Also an ongoing safety check on a collective basis for us.
And in appreciation for all you have recently joined!
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#185134 - 06/25/09 07:36 AM
Re: Not introducing self to BWSM
[Re: orchid]
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Registered: 11/19/08
Posts: 1758
Loc: American living in Germany
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I agree, Orchid.
_________________________
As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live. Goethe
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#185233 - 06/26/09 12:51 PM
Re: Not introducing self to BWSM
[Re: chatty lady]
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Da Queen
Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
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Orchid, thank you for starting this thread. It chaps me when people come in here only to sell, sell, sell. They could give a rip who we are, what we are about, or anything else. Yet they think we will be bowled over by their ad? I think not. I find it insulting. Maybe that's too strong a statement to make, but it is how a new post like that makes me feel. Forgive me Dotsie if I'm saying too much here. They don't call me the Mouth of the South for nutin.
That's why I keep bringing up the "Please read before you post" thing.
Another one that gripes me are people who only stop by under the pretext of some "happening" in their life but it is really obvious that they only want to capture us for a teleseminar, a book they've written, or post about some drama IN THEIR LIVES...or to sell, as you said. These are BWS members too! They don't care about us, or the day to day...they're only concerned about themselves.
I call them TRUE COLORS members. They have shown their true colors to me. It's all about them.
There again, we are suppose to run pat them on the back and once we do, poof! They're gone again for a few months.
I realize that tons of people don't have the time to come in here all the time. That is so understandable. REALLY. But...couldn't they stick around long enough to comment in one or two more threads, instead of just posting about their own life, lack thereof, or whatever?
<Queen stepping down from soapbox>
Whew! I feel better...anybody else? LOL!
ps---I am in NO WAY referring to Sandpiper...she knows that, but I wanted to make sure you gals knew it too. Actually, I'm not pointing a finger at anyone, necessarily. Just past experience on here. Please keep Sandpiper and family in your prayers!
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#185289 - 06/27/09 02:12 AM
Re: Not introducing self to BWSM
[Re: jawjaw]
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Member
Registered: 06/27/05
Posts: 2561
Loc: Alabama
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I understand completely about the 'sales pitch' on this web site...the rules are clear and I agree, but JJ...I don't mean to offend but the comment, "post some drama about their lives"...isn't that part of what this web site is about? You referred to some members who only care about what's going on in their lives and that once they get a pat on the back they go on their merry way. Or they only talk about themselves. Maybe that's what some people need or all that some people have time for. When I first started here in the forums I had a lot of time and could post like crazy...not so much anymore. Things change and what takes precedence in our lives change and not everyone has time to scroll through all the forums and make comments. And some members only need this site when they need a place to go for advice/a pat/guidance/venting. What should it matter if a member comes in once or a hundred times...once a year or a thousand times a year...I don't think it's fair to put a lable (TRUE COLORS MEMBER) on a member just because she doesn't post to other's comments or doesn't fit into certain people's mold of how often they come in and if they need to comment on other people's forums. One of the sentences on BWS home page at the very beginning says that this is a place where there is no judgement. When a staff member starts judging those who only want to 'vent' about a drama going on in their lives, I don't think that's a very professional thing to do. I probably fit into that label at times. I come in and read but don't always have time to comment. I do what I can when I have the time to do it and I'm certain that others do too. That doesn't mean that we don't care about others...it means that we just don't feel like coming in and sharing with or as often like other members do. Sometimes I'm so busy that all I have time to do is share that good or bad moment with everyone...it's saying...hi, I'm still alive, here's what going on..gotta run...love ya. If a person comments...great...if not, I don't worry about it. I don't think any less of anyone if they don't. I just don't think any of us should judge members for how often they post or if they respond to someone or not or if we hear from them once or if it's only about their life. To do so isn't fair to what this site, I believe, is about. Maybe I'm wrong...
_________________________
Dee "They will be able to say that she stood in the storm and when the wind did not blow her away....and surely it has not.....she adjusted her sails" - Elizabeth Edwards
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#185299 - 06/27/09 04:38 AM
Re: Not introducing self to BWSM
[Re: orchid]
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Registered: 01/21/07
Posts: 3675
Loc: British Columbia, Canada
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My comments are confined only to the sales pitch/survey folks or those who register and have only 1-2 posts ...for the next few months. As for members and how they participate, I will say for myself that I don't check every topic/section daily. It does take time to check every section. Am trying to envision if there were quadruple the number of regular posters here, how much more checking there would be. And checking frequency by members is invisible to us, vs. actually responding which results in a message/thought.
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#185337 - 06/27/09 03:01 PM
Re: Not introducing self to BWSM
[Re: Dotsie]
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Da Queen
Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
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Dee, I believe you took what I said out of context, and most likely, it wasn't on purpose. But what I said,
pretext of some "happening" in their life but it is really obvious that they only want to capture us for a teleseminar, a book they've written, or post about some drama IN THEIR LIVES...or to sell, as you said.
NOTICE THE WORD PRETEXT?
It wasn't meant for members of the NABBW or members of the forum who can't get by here as often as they would like to do, or ones who only have a snippet of time here and there.
Sigh...I apologize to anyone who thought otherwise, including and especially Dee. I am very aware of people who have needs and have thought that I have been very compassionate in my responses to them. Apparently, not. I will be more diligent.
Thank you Dee for calling this to my attention. I need to read my post more than once BEFORE I hit SUBMIT.
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