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#87279 - 11/17/06 12:09 AM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: craftyone]
craftyone Offline
Member

Registered: 09/17/05
Posts: 60
Loc: Illinois
Here's an update on the wedding front.
I have been talking to my dtr regularly lately. This is a good thing. Her dress is being ordered on Monday, as she was fitted. It is beautiful. It was also quite expensive, but what ya gonna do???
I am looking into having the shower at a golf club that is close by and my son's girlfriend worked at. She is trying to get me a good deal. I had not planned on this big expense, as I do not believe I should be giving her this shower. Just my beliefs. So what I am doing is putting my other daughter's name on the invitations stating that she is giving it. If the mother-in-law wants to put her name on it- I don't care. I just don't want her running it. She had her turn with her daughter - now its my turn. Does that sound awful???
Dtr called me today to tell me she found a "deal" on the bridesmaids dresses. She shopped around at all the bridal shops for the best deal. I think she is making herself nuts trying to find deals on everything, and assumes everyone SHOULD deal!!!! But at least she settled on one place and now the dresses need to be ordered by 12-15.
So things are moving and she and I are talking often. The future SIL was here last w/e when we had out of town company. My hubby was NOT at ease that night and nothing much was said between the three of us. Hubby, SIL and I. I tried to explain why to my dtr when she mentioned it, but I do think she is going to stick up for him and his family no matter what. But - I am thinking things will be very different a few years down the road. We will see. Thanks for listening. Happy Thanksgiving Everyone.
_________________________
Cathy

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#87280 - 12/07/06 02:32 AM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: craftyone]
DebShines Offline
Member

Registered: 06/08/06
Posts: 111
Loc: Brisbane Australia
Hello Cathy it is nearly one month since your post. How are things?

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#87281 - 12/07/06 10:48 PM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: DebShines]
jawjaw Offline
Da Queen

Registered: 07/02/03
Posts: 12025
Loc: Alabama
I'm wondering the same thing. Update please?

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#87282 - 12/13/06 12:11 AM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: jawjaw]
craftyone Offline
Member

Registered: 09/17/05
Posts: 60
Loc: Illinois
Hi Ladies -
I feel honored that you want an update!!! I have just been super busy these days and have had no time to post or even to read. Its finals week and I am soooooo far behind in Christmas things too.
Actually - funny you should ask. All the girls dresses need to be ordered by Friday. I took my younger dtr on Saturday for her measurements and to order her dress.
The bride(my other dtr) came over on Friday to see a few things I had picked up for her. While she was here, my niece called (one of her bridemaids)and I overheard the conversation. Seems my niece just found out she is pregnant. She is due in early August, which means she will be about 8 mo at the time of the wedding. My dtr did not know what to do - but she did tell her she still wants her in the wedding. So its going to cost my niece twice as much for the dress now because it needs extra length and a larger size and they will alter it. My niece wants to be a part of it all THEN.........my dtr decides that she feels bad that she did not ask my son's gf to stand up - so she asked her - and NOW WE HAVE 11 - YES ELEVEN bridesmaids. This is getting nutty - I can't even imagine what my house will be like the day of the wedding with all these girls here. And my house is average sized. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
It just gets crazier and crazier!!!
I did book a hall for the shower. I was not pleased that I have to put out all this additional money - but I decided to bite the bullet and just do it. I don't want to argue with her anymore. And yes - she did get her way about it, but I just had to do it. There was one slight problem - my dtr was worried because this hall does not like you to bring in food. And OF COURSE - HIS mother wants to bring cookies......I swear she brings them wherever she goes. I did talk to the hall and because they know me, they are giving me a great deal and they also told me it is up to me if I want cookies brought in. I say the heck with it - let the woman do it. I guess thats what makes her happy. BUT I will limit it.
Hubby is not doing well with the future SIL tho. We were at a family gathering this past w/e and he was VERY uncomfortable. He was avoiding SIL at all costs. I don't agree with this behavior. But there is not alot I can do. I feel it is between them now. Hubby does not want it all swept under the carpet and thinks that is what I am doing. I have not forgotten what was said. I just give it to the ONLY ONE who can help. I pray about it and give the reigns to HIM. Thats the best I can do. I am worried that if he cannot let this go, what will happen in the future. He will have to give a toast at the wedding and what will he have to say about someone who he is not happy with????????
Thanks for caring everyone, and sorry this is so long. I have to start looking for my dress soon!!!
_________________________
Cathy

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#87283 - 12/13/06 06:22 PM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: craftyone]
Dotsie Offline
Founder

Registered: 07/09/08
Posts: 23647
Loc: Maryland
I'm laughing about your cookie comment. I wonder if she'll bring cookies to the wedding!

I can't imagine eleven bridesmaids. That's humungous!

I have a felelling your hubby will pull through with the toast. You have lots of time for some healing to occur. Keep praying. You are doing what is best.
_________________________
Founder Emeritus of Boomer Women Speak and the National Association of Baby Boomer Women.
www.nabbw.com
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#87284 - 12/13/06 08:36 PM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input!
craftyone Offline
Member

Registered: 09/17/05
Posts: 60
Loc: Illinois
Go ahead - laugh!!!! It is kinda funny when ya think about it!!!
Yes - 11 bridesmaids is teetering on reeediculous!!!! I am thinking its gonna take an hour just for them to walk down the church aisle!!!! Do ya think people will stick around for the bride????? After I am spending all that $$ on the dress!!???
_________________________
Cathy

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#87285 - 12/13/06 09:21 PM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: craftyone]
Louisa Offline
Member

Registered: 07/11/04
Posts: 2132
Loc: MA
Crafty, 11 bridesmaids is a lot, that's fr sure. I don't understand though, why is your husband giving the toast? It's usually the best man.

Louisa

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#87286 - 12/14/06 10:49 AM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: Louisa]
Dianne Offline
Queen of Shoes

Registered: 05/24/04
Posts: 6123
Loc: Arizona
I've never seen a wedding with that many bridesmaids. Gads. Keep up the humor, you're gonna need it I think. This too shall pass.
_________________________
If it doesn't feel good, don't do it twice.
www.eadv.net



Boomer Queen of Shoes

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#87287 - 01/01/07 11:47 PM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: Dianne]
craftyone Offline
Member

Registered: 09/17/05
Posts: 60
Loc: Illinois
Louisa -
Here, anyone can toast the bride and groom. I have seen where the best man, maid of honor and father of the bride do. ANd I have also seen some that were really ridiculous and it kept going on and on from there - whoever wanted to toast - did. It gets a bit nutty and long if you ask me and I sure hope they do not have that happen. Things are going to get busy now I think. I have alot to do. I need to find a dress for me, and I am starting a job 4 days a week on the 15th of Jan, so its going to get busy.
Happy New Year Everyone!!! Peace, Joy and Blessings to you all in 2007!!
_________________________
Cathy

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#87288 - 01/02/07 07:39 PM Re: Daughter's Wedding - need your input! [Re: craftyone]
Pam R. Offline
Member

Registered: 03/10/06
Posts: 404
Cathy, I have seen 9 bridesmaids at a good friends daughter's wedding and it was a whole tribe of long dresses going down the aisle! But, some girls just can't say "no" to someone they think would be offened. That is the least of your worries! At my daughter's wedding nearly 2 years ago, the best man and maid of honor made the toast. My husband did not...however, there was some talk that he should have! Too late now, we never saw a father do it before, except on that commercial on TV! Anyway, it is all over so fast and no one remembers what happened anyway. Try hard to enjoy and relish in every moment. And yes, keeping the peace is very important too. The future is what you want to count on with a relationship with your daughter for years to come. Good luck with the dress shopping!
_________________________
Pam

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