Oh J.J., you said it well, and I feel exactly the same way. I didn't run into those issues when my daughter got married 15 months ago. I really think his parents knew it was the girl's family who was "in charge" of the wedding plans since they had girls of their own. However, I will say that I called his mom every single time there was a date to be discussed regarding the engagement, shower and even baby shower. I wanted to be sure she was available before I went on with the planning. She was very appreciative that I asked her first before any final bookings. She also asked if there was anything she could do, and even offered her house for one of the parties. I refused and said I would prefer to have it out in a restaurant and she graciously stepped back. Yes, we are different too in many ways, but we RESPECT each other and will continue to do so. I doubt that we ever will be best of friends since we don't have very much in common (other than our children's marriage), but that is fine, so long as we are cordial to each other. Craftyone...if you don't fix this now, things will be her way forever. By that I mean, where all the holidays will be spent and issues with grandchildren as well. I agree with J.J., a sit-down talk with your daughter is in order, RIGHT NOW!