Flipperjo,
I helped take care of my mom for 10 years, but I was lucky. She was always sweet and appreciative.

Your DH has an obligation to make sure your parents have a decent amount of care, but you do not have the obligation to be a doormat. If his parents have the funds to pay for help, and have made themselves too obnoxious to receive it for free, then that's the bed they've made.

Sorry if this sounds cold, but people reap what they sow.

Good luck!

PS - your nickname seems so familiar I can't help wondering if I 'knew' you at some other website.
_________________________
My website http://www.carolynagosta.com