Good morning Ladies,
Just wanted to connect and try to improve my day. Nothing extremely awful happening, just one of those meltdown days. I've been sick and I think that and being so tired, is just causing me to be more emotional than usual. A lot of small problems starting popping up too and pretty soon I felt overwhelmed. Add to that being lonely. I miss my husband so much. He was a quiet man, but a comforting presence. I have no one to comfort me anymore. Sorry to whine, tomorrow will be better, I know. Thanks for listening.

Big hugs. You aren't whining, you are grieving. It's o.k. We love you. Wish we could be there to give you a great, big, collective hug!

Casey,
Thank you so much! Hugs are much appreciated. I sure miss my husband's bear hugs.

Here's one from me copygal, (((HUGS))).
Missing someone is so painful. Sometimes you feel like you are dying yourself, just for the longing of being with that person.

Bluebird,
You are so right about that. In the early days, I wondered if I'd survive the sadness. After two years, I do pretty well day to day, but once in a while, it hits me really hard and I get so depressed, I just want to cry all day. I've come to the conclusion that the "old me" did die with Mel, and I've had to reinvent myself and my life without him. I'm not crazy about it, but what choice do I have? Anyway, thanks for the hugs;I need all I can get. All you gals are great! Thanks.

You know copygal I still to this very day talk to my husband about everything. People probably think I'm nuts talking to myself but its to him usually. I sometimes wonder if I adore and yes seem to worship my son because looking at him is like looking at his dad, the exact same mannerisms and expressions....Casey is exactly right, its grieving not whining and there is a huge difference. There is a saying, "Its better to have loved and lost" and so on, but until one has, it isn't possible to know the degree of emptyness and feeling of helplessness it leaves behind. You'll have good days and bad days, its inevitable...

[ June 22, 2006, 07:49 PM: Message edited by: chatty lady ]

Chatty Lady,
I know you're right, but it still hurts so much some days. I'm lucky that I had him in my life for as long as I did, but it just wasn't long enough and I miss him. Thanks for listening and giving me a shoulder to cry on. I appreciate all of you here on this forum.

Chatty Lady, and everyone....I hear you!!! My husband has only been gone since May. I had allergies real bad and that made me cry even more. We just have to go with these emotions/feelings and honor them. It is the process of grieving. Some days are better than others. You have my support - Love, Betsie

Good afternoon Ladies,
Thanks to all of you who helped me make it through yesterday. I appreciate all the good advice and the hugs(a special thank you for the hugs-I really needed them!) I got a good night's sleep and feel much better today. I just need lots of work and some good things happening, and I can get on with it. I posted today in my blog and I'd love for ya'll to come visit me there if you can. Writing is the best therapy for me, and that's as near as I get to feeling happy these days. Even if you think you're not a writer, I'd suggest journaling as therapy for this time in your life. You may not tell your friends and family exactly what you're thinking and feeling, but tell yourself the truth, be honest and write it down. And if you need help, ask for it.
Thanks again for everything. You gals are the best! And if I can do anything to help ya'll, you only have to ask.

Copygal,
I jumped in here a bit late but am pleased you are on the up swing. It is too bad that we can't transport ourselves to those that need us. It would make things so much easier.

All we can give is words of encouragement and you have them. This is a great place to come when you need a shoulder, a hug or just a place to express your fears. We are with you.

Lynn