Hi All: I'm new to this forum, but I'm glad to have gotten here..I thihk...as a 51 widow of 2 young children, I'm never sure of anything. My husband of 27 yrs died 1/25/04. Our children are now 9 and 11. I miss him everyday, as does his children!

I found this forum as I was searching for "midlife crisis" and how much of that plays into the scheme of life right now...how much is widowhood? how much is my own persona?

As I type I'm sitting in a hotel getting ready to audition for acceptance into a university music therapy program....seems that creative outlet is common for midlifers..?? To accept that placement, means uprooting my whole family from the small small town I've always lived to the city..its a gamble in all respects, emotionally, educationally, and financially...(I'm poor:-0) I'm not sure what to do...what is in the best interest of everyone? THe kids are getting an adequate, but certainly not *fine* education...and I look at being financially solvent in 2 years if I stay put. I work part time doing music therapy w/o the credentials (nor calling myself that)

I want my husband back...I want my life back. I want that surity that came in those earlier years. I want to know that I'm doing the right thing, even if I fail at it all, that its the right thing to do...to try.

I'm just lost lost lost and have 2 young ones depending on me...it gets a bit overwhelming somedays! I need to do whats right for them, as well as for me, as well as for us as a family..Whats the answer to that?

well, I feel better having vented....what a way to make an introduction! Now I better go practice a bit before I head off to the University

Thanks for being here...