Thank you all for the good advice. I do feel better knowing I've taken steps toward independence. Of course when I did, he has gone overboard trying to get me back under his control.

Today we go to the VA to see what the "significant findings" were on his MRI. And my daughter goes to court March 3rd. I couldn't sleep last night because there is so much of my life hanging by a thread. Believe it or not, but its my daughter who is possibly facing doing time, who is trying her best to encourage me.

That touches my heart very much.

Number5, I'm so pleased to see that you took everyone's advice and got your own bank account.

I'm hoping that every day you continue to gain strength and feel better about yourself. You're a good woman and a strong mom. You and your daughter can be pillars of strength to hold each other up. As you continue to feel better and know you can get away from this manipulating man you will also sleep better. Take the time each day to do things that are restorative to your health. Don't neglect yourself and your needs at this time.

My very best wishes are with you always.

Number 5...let me add my congratulations and support at this time...and whatever the result of your husband's MRI ...you can lend him moral support...but don't let him manipulate you with it...think with your brain and not your heart regarding this man...

I hope you can sleep a little better tonight...

Number5, don't give up your power...your already feeling better and more independent. Move forward.

Your a kind woman to take him to the VA for his appointment...hope he appreciates your support.

You will sleep better when some of this has lifted from you shoulders. All you can do is pray, then let go...give it to God.

My thoughts are with you.

Thanks to all of you for your support. Today his health is the last thing on my mind, however. The report at the VA wasn't good. He is an enigma as they can't find the problem yet. Many more visits and many more surgeries to correct whatever it is.

What is about to kill me literally today is that in about a week, March 3rd I may not see my daughter again free for years!!

Her lawyer won't even return my calls. She has violated her probation for the 3rd time and the program she was to go into instead of prison lost her test results???!!!

Ladies, I can tell you right now, I have typically been a strong woman, but this is the last straw. I can't bear the thought of my daughter going to prison for a year, let alone years. I'm about to go down. I can't take it. I can't bear it. How do I explain where Mommy went to my grandaughter?? They both are doing so good right now. My daughter really has changed and is trying. She wants to get her life on the right track and keep it there.

I'm sorry ladies, but I have to go to court with her alone. There is no one to go with me. My husband said last night that he couldn't stand the 1 1/2 hr car trip with the three of us, my daughter, grandaughter and me talking and making noise. I have no one to go with me and I may have to hear that judge's words saying years...then drive home alone with my little grandaughter.

I don't think I can do it. Please pray for me and for my daughter and keep us in your thoughts.

I'm sending you a hug right now and my heart breaks for you.

I don't have much advice to give you and we both know anything I say will probably not help much at this point in time but I will be praying for you and that the judge won't be too hard on her.

Really sorry you're going through this.

Number5, my heart breaks for you, too. Wish I could be there to go with you. Have you asked anyone from your church to take the ride?
I will pray that the judge will see her progress and give her another chance, especially since she has a little girl.
(((HUGS)))

Number5...

We are never given more than we can handle...he provides a way for you to see light.
Right now you are projecting forward in time and seeing the negative.
None of us knows the what the future holds.

You are a strong woman... and you will continue to be strong for your daughter and your granddaughter.

I've been saying prayers for you...and I know God hears them.

He will provide a way for you.

If, I was near...I would go with you.

Thank you Bluebird, YepThatsMe and Dianne. I'm deeply touched. I'm really trying not to project, but being the realist..it doesn't look good.

I have no choice but to live what I profess to believe and trust God for the future. This is all so magnified so much more I think, because it wasn't but two years ago that I felt the horrible loss of my husband. Loss sucks!! I can't go through that kind of horrible pain again.

I know for myself, I don't project as much as I prepare myself for the worst(while praying for the best of course)...just for a little control on my part, I guess. Seems to help me plan.