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#7384 - 11/13/05 10:49 PM Re: Marriage counseling?
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
The truth hurts no matter who is doing the telling...most men don't want and can't accept any truth but their own.....well imagine that.

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#7385 - 11/13/05 10:51 PM Re: Marriage counseling?
Bluebird Offline
Member

Registered: 09/20/05
Posts: 2560
Loc: Pagosa Springs, Colorado
People who don't examine themselves and their motives, can never be humble enough to see their own faults. They certainly can't bear it if someone holds a mirror up to them. What a shame.
I've never felt physically attractive but I look in that spiritual mirror every day and I don't always like what I see. But I look and I ask God to "beautify" me from the inside. If more people did that, they would treat others better.

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#7386 - 11/14/05 03:33 AM Re: Marriage counseling?
Princess Lenora Offline
Member

Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 3503
Loc: Colorado
Marriage counseling strengthened my marriage. My husband had no hesitation about going. We were well treated as a couple. I wanted a counselor who incorporated spiritual principles but did not use Christianity as a crutch. In other words, I wanted to use spirituality as an adjunct to therapy, not as a substitute for mental health. So, I called our church, and I got a list of names of therapists who had put themselves on the church list. The counselor I found was a member of the church. She was a LCSW Licensed Clincial Social Worker, Master's in Social Work. Social Workers provide 65 percent of the mental health counseling nationwide, and they must be licensed in the state they practice in, which means at least 2 years of supervised practice. My H and I came into great understanding and insights together during counseling.

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#7387 - 11/14/05 03:43 AM Re: Marriage counseling?
Daisygirl Offline
Member

Registered: 08/25/05
Posts: 1052
Loc: Ohio
Lynnie, good for you! You have a husband who is an honorable man who wants to keep his promises.

I think when marriage counseling doesn't work, it's because one of the parties isn't interested in it working. I think it's wrong to say it takes 2 people to break up a marriage....it only takes 1.

Daisygirl

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#7388 - 11/14/05 05:18 AM Re: Marriage counseling?
LSmith5434 Offline
Member

Registered: 10/02/05
Posts: 370
Loc: Washington State
Daisygirl........I was always told it took two to break of a marriage. That both sides were at wrong. I'm beginning to believe that's a bunch of "crock!"
Lynne

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#7389 - 11/14/05 05:53 AM Re: Marriage counseling?
norma Offline
Member

Registered: 10/29/05
Posts: 286
Loc: western canada
Lynne and Daisy... Thank you !!!! First time i've ever heard someone come right out and say that.
It is a crock. And it lays another guilt and blame trip on who ever has tried and tried to do everything possible for years to make it work.

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#7390 - 11/14/05 02:05 PM Re: Marriage counseling?
Daisygirl Offline
Member

Registered: 08/25/05
Posts: 1052
Loc: Ohio
Norma, I do take responibility for not choosing my husbands more wisely in my 2 marriages. I was very young when I married the first time, but should've known better for the 2nd.

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#7391 - 11/14/05 06:27 PM Re: Marriage counseling?
norma Offline
Member

Registered: 10/29/05
Posts: 286
Loc: western canada
so many marriages end up in trouble and divorce, and yet who doesn't start out with a leap of faith and the best intentions. I should not have said anything on this topic, because i no longer believe in 'marriage'. Living common law with a good friend, yes.

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#7392 - 11/14/05 10:39 PM Re: Marriage counseling?
chatty lady Offline
Writer

Registered: 02/24/04
Posts: 20267
Loc: Nevada
And CROCK it is big time. One partner can be madly in love with the other and not have a clue that they are cheating or feeling differently until some small slip makes them suspicious and still they don't want to see the truth, or know the truth until it jumps up and bites them right on the butt. By then it's uaually too late for one reason or another. It only takes ONE to mess up a good marriage and usually its the SELFISH one.....Nothing wrong with co-habitation in this day and age either. Told my new friend right from the get go, if he'looking for marriage, look somewhere else.... [Roll Eyes]

[ November 14, 2005, 07:42 PM: Message edited by: chatty lady ]

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#7393 - 11/14/05 11:49 PM Re: Marriage counseling?
norma Offline
Member

Registered: 10/29/05
Posts: 286
Loc: western canada
Chatty... a giant hug to you !!It was so hard trying to console a daughter who's husband got a girlfriend, another one who's husband among other things 'needed sex with others because he'd married 'too' young, and the last one whose husband yelled, swore at their kids, didn't see anything wrong with swiping things from where ever and drank continually. Poor choices they made yes, but before marriage, these fellows seemed normal.

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