He is going to Rome, Florence, Geneva, Nice, and Paris.

Dianne, thanks for the link to Linda's article in Road and Travel Magazine. She did a great job with the piece, and what a great list of hotels. I'm going to hang onto it. It's always a good feeling when you book a room knowing the hotel has been vetted and recommended by an insider.

Dotsie: back at you shortly with suggestions for your son.

I love Nice. Beautiful area. Too bad he can't go further south and visit St. Tropez. Are they traveling by train?

Dotise,

Here's a quick (but long) list of sites/places your son might want to check out. There's actually more than enough to keep him busy just within the cities he's visiting -- everyone should be lucky enough to spend 3 1/2 weeks in Rome, Paris, Nice, Geneva and Florence -- and just roaming the cities with a street map and a good guide will keep his eyes popping out of his head. (I highly recommend the Michelin Green Guides, especially if there will be any road trips or visits to towns outside the major cities.) But here are some ideas off the top of my head:

1. Nice - While the beach is the thing, spend a spot of time turned inland, checking out the gracious belle-epoque architecture: turrets, long-windowed facades, balconies, wrought iron. At the beach, find the Negresco Hotel, a belle-epoque landmark. The Negresco faces the beach, which is lined with oceanfront cafes. While they're expensive, it's fun to grab a table at one of these and while a few afternoon hours away eating fresh seafood, sipping wine and watching the beautiful people.

From Nice, there are so many places he could visit. Antibes is close by, which Dianne loved (see posts above). Also, to the northwest are the Provence towns of Vence and Grasse. To the east, on the coast, he could easily take in Monte Carlo. Venturing north on almost any road, he can explore some of the perched villages of the Maritime Alps. For a spectacular view of the Riviera, he should check out superbly-sited medieval Eze (see an earlier post). And, the ancient stone town of Roquebrune is near Eze, too. The Michelin Green Guide has wonderful,
detailed write-ups of all the small medieval villages in the Maritime Alpes above Nice and Menton.

2. Rome - Just the sites in the city's ancient heart (Colosseum/Forum area) could keep a person busy for a week, and this is where he should start. Near the Colosseum is the small church of San Pietro in Vincoli (St. Peter in Chains). Inside sits Michaelangelo's Moses. It's pretty heady to walk into a small neighborhood church and see a Michaelangelo colossus just sitting there. Cross the Tevere (Tiber) river to Vatican City, which should be especially interesting now. Go into the crypt below St. Peter's to view the popes' tombs. The dome of St. Peter's is mind-boggling, and you can walk up a catwalk and sprial metal steps behind an inside wall, up into the dome. (I tried it three times, got vertigo, and had to come back down. I almost passed out as I watched two young Japanese girls in spiked heels climb past me, with each step nearly catching their heels between the metal slats of the catwalk. I thought they were surely destined to die a long, plummeting death, but God was with them.) Michaelangelo's Pieta sits in St. Peter's. The Sistine Chapel with Michaelangelo's ceiling is a must. Go early before the lines form. Besides the Colosseum/Forum area, there are Roman ruins everywhere -- pieces of the old Appian Way, the Hippodrome, the Catacombs, the Baths of Caracella, the Circus Maximus. For more modern relaxing, just sit on the Spanish Steps and people-watch. Hang at the Trevi Fountain. Everyone else is there. Hang in the Trestevere neighborhood. Across the Tiber from most of the tourist areas, it's full of small restaurants and narrow streets. From Rome, it's about a 45-minute drive to the coast. This area of the coast is not too attractive, but there's Ostia Antica, yet more vestiges of the Roman Empire.

3. Florence -- Florence is nonstop eye candy. It's just wonderful. The Duomo (Cathedral) with its massive terra cotta dome lords over the city. The Duomo's massive bronze doors were carved by Ghiberti. Walk across the Ponte Vecchio, an ancient bridge and one of the only (the only?) ancient bridges over the Arno to survive Allied bombing in WWII. The bridge, a covered arcade, is an ocher masterpiece, full of shops -- many jewelry shops. Don't miss seeing Michelangelo's David. It is truly sublime. There's a copy of it and other masterpieces in the courtyard of the Palazzo Vecchio, but you must see the original in the Accademia. Again, lines are long, so go early if you can. Above the banks of the Arno, on the side opposite from Florence proper, runs a road called the Piazzale Michelangelo. From up here, you get a fabulous view of all of Florence and the Duomo below you.

Just outside of Florence, on a hillside, is a tiny town alled Fiesole, which has some old villas and gardens and ancient ruins. A quiet, pretty sidetrip out of the city.

From Florence, it's possible to make sidetrips to Pisa, on the coast, but a terrific take is to go to Siena, a totally medieval Tuscan town. The place to go in Siena is right smack into the city's heart to the ampitheatre-shaped Campo, the town's huge, cobbled main square. This is where the Palio is held each summer. The Palio is a rip-roaring horse race that's been held since the middle ages. There are restaurants and outdoor cafes lining the whole Campo.

Not far from Siena is the tiny, walled medieval town of San Gimignano. (My husband has relatives there. We've never met them, but it's fun to think that Adam and Dana have Italian third cousins who live in a medieval walled city.) You see San Gimignano long before you get there. Dozens of bell towers (I forget how many there are today) rise up into the sky. During the middle ages, rich families tried to outdo one another by building higher, more elaborate bell towers, and most of them still stand.

And, yet another possiblity if there's time for a several-day train trip is to go to Venice. Venice is, simply, one of the most gorgeous cities on the planet and is reason enough to go to Italy. No cars allowed. As you cruise down the Grand Canal for the first time, you'll wonder what you ever did to deserve a journey to such a magical place.

4. Paris -- Suggestion #1: call Dianne's sister Linda. I don't think anyone knows the secret places of the city better than she does! For the first-time visitor to Paris, I'd say time should be focused around the Latin Quarter and Left Bank of the Seine. This will give you Notre Dame, the warren of old streets and bohemian hubbub of the Boulevard St. Michel, the Boulevard St.Germain. Definitely take in the Musee D'Orsay. You won't see a finer collection of Impressionist treasures anywhere in the world. I'd even go here before the Louvre (unless you can't live without seeing the Venus de Milo and the Mona Lisa, and given that your son loved the The Da Vinci Code, I'm sure he'll end up in the Louvre -- maybe on one of Linda's tours!).

Very close to Notre Dame and the Latin Quarter is a little gem in the middle of the Seine -- the Ile St. Louis. It's a tiny little island that is an idyllic neighborhood world unto itself -- and it has great ice cream shops. You get views of the city from here that most people miss.

Other things I'd recommend seeing in Paris: La Sainte Chappelle, on the Right Bank, not far from City Hall (the Hotel de Ville). This is a spectacular Gothic chapel which has non-stop, floor-to-ceiling stained glass that will absolutely blow you away. Sacre-Coeur: This is a white-domed Taj-Mahal-looking church that sits atop a hill in Montmartre. It's up in the northern part of the city, but worth it for the views and to scope out the rather touristy but interesting Place du Tertre, where artists sit and paint. Ride the Metro to get up there. The Paris Metro is a great way to get around. The Bois de Boulogne: An immense green space on the city's western flank. The Place des Vosges: an architecturally perfect urban square lined with exquisite townhouses from the 18th (?) century. Victor Hugo lived and wrote here.

Outside of Paris, there's Versailles. If you have time, don't miss it. Got more time? Take the high-speed train from the Gare du Nord to London, via the Chunnel under the English Channel. You can leave in the morning, have lunch and/or dinner in London, and return the same day. Young people now routinely hop over to London to go clubbing. (Makes me tired just thinking about it.)

5. Geneva - I have not been to Geneva, but know people who have. Take a cruise on the lake (or drive) to cities/towns like Montreux and Lausanne, which sit on the lake. It's a reasonable train or car ride to get to Lyon, a beautiful French city famed for its cuisine. Or, to see the Alps, head up to Chamonix and Mont Blanc, within reach from Geneva.

Hope that helps! Wish your son "bon voyage" for me.

You've likely all seen the May 17 issue of TIME with boomer women as the cover story. There have been some postings about it on other forums. Good article. (The only thing missing was Dotsie.)

Jennifer Wright, a BWS member, was featured in the article for having traded her position as a university professor of occupational therapy in Indiana to become a travel guide for "MidLife Heroines" in New Zealand. Kiwijenn, as she's known on the BWS boards, experienced her life turning point while on a backpakcing trip with her son.

I invited her to come over to this forum to share some insights on how travel and seizing adventure have enriched her life. Perhaps she'll be able to pop by.

But the crux of the article was that "women at middle age are twice as likely to be hopeful about their future" as men. At midlife, said TIME, women "may first turn inward, ask the cosmic questions or retrieve some passion they put aside to make room for a career and family and adult responsibilities." And what are those passions? "Take a trip. Write a novel. Go back to school. Learn to kiteboard."

In the article, Wright talked about the confidence she gained on that pivotal backpacking trip with her son that enabled her to metamorphose into an adventure coach who leads trip through rugged, beautiful New Zealand terrain. She also talked about the 'internal journey." Wright was quoted as saying, "You step out of time. You don't know what day it is, what time it is. You eat when you're hungry. And when you come back, you are changed."

I've always felt that that inner confidence is one of travel's greatest gifts. When you're out of your familiar space, beyond your routine comfort zone, you find out what you've got inside. You may use some or all of it on a given trip, depending on the challenges you face. But, like Wright said, when you come back, you are changed.

Lori
Thank you for that uplifting post. This morning I really needed that reminder of what traveling does for the spirit.
I have been so excited about our little cross country trek with Alex, but somehow yesterday I began to lose my confidence. I had a stupid home accident, missed an appointment, and almost had a car accident. Seemed like my brain disconnected and I just wanted to cry.
I became frightened of being on the road with such valuable cargo. I am also doing some other things that are out of my comfort zone and I became overcome with self doubt.
But your post reminded me this morning of how I have found joy and new confidence in venturing out of my cozy little nest to travel and how I might again find new confidence.

On another note, as the resident pseudo scientist, I think there is physiological basis for the psychological benefits of ground travel.
I worked with some psychologists from Yale who were researching the effects of the Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing therapy following the Oklahoma City bombing. I was a part of their study and I am here to tell you it works!
Later a friend went through a very serious health trauma and had to travel for further care. Because he was too ill to fly, we traveled by train. He looked out the window all the way. When we arrived at our destination, his symptoms were absolutely gone. His spirit was lifted and he was looking at the world through whole new eyes.
I kind of put the two together and came up with a theory. I think because our body's fight or flight response to adrenalin is suppressed, it turns to stress. Men and women can no longer just get into a fist fight to settle differences or run away from the psychological dangers of the work place or home. Instead we must all manipulate our way to the top and through family's problems. So the adrenalin with no physical outlet builds up in our bodies and becomes stress which makes us physically, emotionally, and spiritually sick.
I think if we can trick our brains into believing we have either fought the adversary or run away we will be healthier in every way. Air travel only seems to add more stressors and does not give the same benefit as perceiving the roadside passing by.
Ground travel gives us some of the same benefits as running away from danger and seems to be the most beneficial. Maybe it is the same benefit from running and walking.
When traveling we go back to our natural state. We run until we're tired then we rest. We move until we're hungry then we eat. We run from the dangers of every day life and return renewed and stronger.

Just another of my crazy theories.
smile

[ May 20, 2005, 01:29 PM: Message edited by: smilinize ]

Smile, your theories never sound crazy to me. You've got it together girl. I'm praying for a safe trip for you and your family. I certainly understand your thoughts about having precious cargo aboard. Don't let that rob you of living in the moment. Turn the safety issue over to God and let Him carry it for you.

Lori, thanks so much for you thoughtful post. I cut and pasted it in an email and sent it to my son. I told him to print it and take it with him. I'm sure he will. He loves to travel. He takes after my husband. Put the two of them in an airport, on a ball field, or on the water and you lose them. They become so wrapped up in the environment. You can see the happiness flowing through their bodies.

Dianne, would you mind emailing me your sister's number? I'll give that to him too.

Thanks for all your kindness ladies. I'm most grateful.

Ah, the things you can do at BWS! I just love it.

Lori, have you been to many islands with plush beaches?

Dots, Dianne, JJ and anyone else between here and there, we're ambling our way to the East coast with no real schedule beginning next weekend. We're going to mine for diamonds in Arkansas Sautuday then take off.
If we get tired or change our minds, we're going to turn around and come home. And if we find something we really like, we're going to stay until we're tired of it. So there is no real schedule. I'm taking the laptop and plan to be in contact along the way as much as possible.
If things go as scheduled, we should be about half way around June 1 or 2 and near D.C. around June 3 or 4. I would love to meet any boomers who might be available around those times.

Hey, this could be research for the Boomer World Tour!!! (Okay, Lori inspired me. I've moved from a National tour to a WORLD tour. Hey, why not?) And if I can only get Dan into a thong we can practice up for the Chippendale dancers too. WHOOOEEE!!! I'm getting excited now!
smile

Smile, what an amazing post. I've reread it three times. You've articulated some deep, important notions about confidence, control, groundedness, pace. My brain is spinning as I link it all up in my head. I think your theory is brilliant and spot on.

First, your trip with Alex. You've already started that journey. By deciding to take it, by starting to plan it, by visualizing it, by simply getting ready to go, you're already on your way. Each new building block you put in place preparatory to actually leaving your driveway is a journey -- a successful one. You're already succeeded at this trip, already achieved small, measured, important steps.

You had a bad day yesterday. Stuff happens. Take a deep breath, slow down, deal with each hurdle as it comes, and then put it aside. If we didn't have hurdles, we wouldn't be able to feel the extreme joy and confidence that comes from clearing them. If there are no lows, there can be no highs.

And there's something else about your trip which is wonderful and inspiring, and that is the fact that you're giving your grandson an experience that will enrich him. He is, as you say, precious cargo. And the fact that that precious cargo and the precious cargo's parents love and trust you enough to say, "Yes, this trip is a great idea," should, in itself, give you confidence. They have confidence in you. They trust you. And trust is earned, not given away for free, and you did the earning. So you've got the stuff, and others see it. When you occasionally misplace pieces of your self-confidence, stop and look at yourself from their eyes, and I bet you'll get it back.

Your theory about eye movement and ground travel and stress is amazing -- that there's a physical basis for the psychological benefits of ground travel -- the ability of ground travel to bolster our confidence and, ultimately, our joy and satisfaction with life. I don't think that's a reach. I think it's real. After I read your post, I thought about the times during travel when I feel good versus the times I don't. I think you're right on, and I think the word "grounded" is a term we can load with meaning.

When I fly, I'm stressed. If I'm flying with my kids, I'm trebly stressed. And it's because I have no control. From takeoff to landing, I must sit and wait for the safe conclusion to a flight I can in no way influence. Your fight or flight analogy is apt. I can do neither. But once on the ground, all control, except divine, comes back to me, and my stress is relieved. I do not consider flight time as a "real" part of a journey. It is a conveyance method to be endured until I arrive at the place where my "ground journey" will begin.

If, on the other hand, I travel by foot, bike (12-speed, no Harleys for me ), train, car, bus or even boat (although you'll never get me on an ocean cruise -- I'd have that same sense of non-control), each moment of movement using those methods is, absolutely, a deep and satisfying part of my journey.

You equate ground travel and the connection of the eyes to one's physical space as you move through it as "a way to trick our brains into thinking we have fought the adversary or run away," making us "healthier in every way." I agree, but I'd throw another possible way of looking at it out at you. While our steady, controlled, forward movement can be an adrenaline-releasing act that relieves stress and puts us in control, helping us feel that we've fought or fled, it can also be an act that takes us not away from danger, but toward and through challenges, toward joy, satisfaction. We can get away from negative things, and we can also move toward positive things.

Each step or mile in a journey yields something. If the something is a challenge, as you're theory assumes, we're "grounded," in control enough, to consider it, weigh options, make a decision, act, and overcome the obstacle. And, once over it, we're stronger than we were when we faced it from the other side. And the next hurdle -- and there will inevitably be one -- just doesn't look that high anymore. With each forward step on the ground, we build confidence.

I could keep going. I'm fascinated by the ideas you've introduced. But I'll stop and let somebody else talk...

Lori,
In the post trauma eye movement therapy that I experienced, they had me go back in my mind to the trauma and instructed me to watch an item that moved in front of my eyes in much the same manner that scenery would move past you if you were running away from the trauma. It worked!

I have used that theory in the theater for stage fright. If you run or walk fast just before going onstage, it gives you a feeling of groundedness that nothing else quite acheives. Sometimes if I can rehearse while I'm riding to the theater or even driving it helps too. I've seen it work for others when I've been directing a production also.

I know it's weird, but like the smile thing, I have learned so much about managing my moods in the theater. In fact, I guess that's what theater is really all about.
Sometimes I wonder if these things only work because I believe they will, but I'm a scientist at heart and I saw smiles and running and eye movement therapy working before I ever believed. Then I researched the physiology and it all came together. I'm just so excited by the mind body connection.

And thank you Lori for the uplifting post. My daughter is almost more excited than I am about Alex goin on this trip. When she was small we made the same trip so often and it contains some some wonderful memories for us all.
Alex's older brother is going to California with friends for his vacation. Becky is home with her baby so she's kind of liviing vicariously for the summer.
smile
P.S. My sister just called and has a new boat on the river where we grew up so we're stopping over there too. I'm getting so excited.
P.S. again. Dotsie, your mailbox is full.

[ May 20, 2005, 02:19 PM: Message edited by: smilinize ]