The power and control information came from a text used in a class for "Men Who Batter." The YWCA where I worked conducted these classes which were 99% court mandated cases. In other words, rarely, if ever, would a man enroll in the class on a voluntary basis. Not only did the men get court mandated to attend after being convicted of assault, but they also had to pay to attend. I never taught these classes, but observed several times. I knew I had accomplished a strong sense of self when I was able to sit in the room facing a group of men who were known wife beaters. (And a couple of gay men who had battered their male lovers.) Unfortunately, there was no way to measure the rewards of the class. A guy could report to his probation officer that he no longer beat his wife or girlfriend or kids, but it was on an honor system. Who was going to believe a known offender? As a social worker, I did not like working with men. I admitted this every time in peer evaluations and self-evaluations. "What population are you least likely to serve?" The male batterers. Yet, I was most likely to be across the hall, tending to the "at risk" mothers who needed 3 hours a week to themselves in "Mom's Time Out." Anyway, I did not coin the phrase "makes her do..." but the language was appropriate to the class.