Dianne,
Sorry this took so long to reply. Life...
Thanks so much for your insite. Its alot easier to understand if you live it. I have tried some of what you have suggested, but never really committed to it. One thing though...he wants me part of the group when they are around. Sometimes I go, sometimes I don't. I don't when I come up with excuses or really am busy. Last nite he tore me up because the nite before we went to his cousins house and his kids were there. I had had just a horrible few days at work and tried my best to pull myself together and be human. Well...obviously I was not nice enough. When I said I was going to call his cousin and asked if I was rude, he backed down. It was about his kids again and as usual like it usually is, they fill his head with nonsnese like what is wrong with Bonnie , she must not like us crap. He won't tell them the truth so he makes excuses for me.
I am so glad your husband saw the light. I don't know if I have the emotional fiber much longer.
Thanks