Thanks starting over. I do understand that submitting has to be in the context of the commandments. If my husband asks me to lie, I wouldn't do it.
The part about my sons looking at porn, is how they do, and will, view women. When I caught my oldest son with a video (he was 16) that's what I worried about. I did not want to embarrass him so I wrote him a letter and left it on his pillow. I was not judgmental or humiliating. I just told him that women are to be respected and cherished and that her body is sacred, not an object. My next son was caught with a magazine, I told him the same. This time, my husband caught our 12 year old (they get younger each time). I asked him if he explained to him why it was wrong and he said he didn't get that far. Of course, I will have to talk to my son. I must always pick up the slack. My husband wouldn't call it a sin and he wouldn't be able to tell him why it's wrong, if he does it too. My husband is claiming that he hasn't been looking at porn since the last time I caught him, but I honestly don't believe him. At this point, even if he hasn't been, I still blame him. There is an evil spirit attached to porn and when you open the door, they keep coming in.

Very interesting reading, these postings...

Why do some males, of all ages, gravitate to porn? The obvious answer for a twelve year old boy would be curiosity. During the parent-child talks, concerning sex, it's to be made certain the parent not only honestly discusses pornography, but, as well, speaks of its self-diminishing effects upon a person's psyche. Teaching children that viewing acts in which human beings are diminished, degraded, brutalized, or portrayed as mere objects, in any way, including sexual, is unacceptable, and detrimental.

Why do adult males, in loving relationships in which mutually enjoyed sex is a part, seek out porn? I'd have to say, if they are first timers, my answer, for number one reason, would be again, curiosity. For men who have long had a taste for porn, which may have begun with the forbidden viewing of girlie-magazines when in their teens, I think it could be just an on-going habit, from which they either never outgrew, or, one in which they found so much enjoyment, they never abandoned. A possible lack of maturation, as far as sex is concerned. A possible retardation of their view of sex.

Along with the reasons above, there are probably as many different reasons men view porn, as there are men. I firmly agree with the statement concerning the ready availability of pornography via the internet, as being in part, a cause. Something that for so long, was banished to the shelves in some back room of a shop, or store, or warehoused in some mail-order facility, now can be accessed with but the typing in of a single-word search term. Men who may have always had a bit of curiosity, concerning porn, but may have hesitated satisfying that curiosity from fear of being publicly discovered, of being labeled low, brutish, perverted, can, in the privacy of their own homes, indulge that curiosity, anonymously. Often once that initial curiosity has been satisfied, they are done with it. It holds no charm for them.

http://www.intouchwithjeannine.com

Almost every show I watch now, ( I don't have cable this is just regular every night TV), has in the story, references to porn--internet or magazine. It's the same with gay relationships--so many shows are adding it to the theme and even if men and boys stop viewing it on the computer, every direction they turn to in society is pushing it.

Even commercials show women in next to nothing or compromising positions to sell product. I would think for an addict that any TV would be off limits.

How do you get a 12 yr. old to not think about it when the shows talk about porn--from every angle--you can watch a CSI and they will talk abou the addictive aspects, then you can turn on a comedy and they will joke about how much fun porn is to watch...

How do we as women effect change in this area? We know it's wrong, we know it's addictive, we know it destroys marriages, we are a large voting block of American opinion--how do we effect change? It's bigger than dealing with it one household at a time. We have judges going against the federal government mandate and allowing gay marriages--the agenda is out there--what are we going to do about it? What can we do aboutit? Do we want to do anything about it? Or do we want to wait until it hits our home, our child, our husband......

It's too late already....and no group of women will stick together long enough or can agree enough to devise a plan let along carry it out....our gooses are cooked!

Oprah had some famous man on her show who said he started out by looking at girly magazines at an early age and it set the stage for porn addiction. The case of a young boy being alone while his poor mom tried to feed them.

I got upset when my ex looked at porn magazines and his response was...so, I get off looking at other women. What's the big deal. All men do it! Nothing like a slap in the face.

I think our country is in big trouble. I have to question...how many times can you look at nude women in poses...there are only so many poses...and still be attracted to it?

Let me count the ways.....too dam many thats how many. Remember these are sick men, maybe not lunatics but they have a screw loose somewhere.

While reading Corinthians this morning, I came across the following in my interpretation for Corinthians 7:3-5.

Sexual temptations are difficult to withstand because they appeal to the normal and natural desires God has given us. Marriage provides God's way to satisfy these natural sexual desires and to strengthen the partners against temptation. Married couples have the responsibility to care for each other: therefore, husbands and wives should not withhold themselves sexually from one another, but should fulfill each other's needs and desires.

I know Bluebird is away, but this shares inforamtion that she was looking for.

I guess the question lies within the precise meaning of fulfilling each other's needs and desires within your marriage. That is different for everyone.

I am new to this message board. I agree that porn is more readily available and it sickins me. I wish there was a way to stop it. It seems to be more acceptable from the younger gals too. Very sad.

I am glad to know that so many of you feel the same way I do about all the porn that's out there. My husband said he never looked at it and then I walked into the room while he was watching it on his computer. We have had more than our share of arguments about it. Now I'm afraid to go near his computer. I looked at it one day just out of curiosity--it made me sick. I don't know why those women would want to do that...in front of God and Everybody with absolutely no shame. Men will enjoy women like that for sex but they will not introduce that woman to their mother and they certainly don't respect them. Some things never change...no matter how modern our thinking gets.

I have a question for you gals out there. If someone goes to look at porn with a CD, is ther anyway I can go into the computer to see that a CD was used? I looked at the Media Player and file, but I believe that is just used for photos. Any ideas?