Thank you, Beachlady, I am trying. BTW - Welcome!

Beachlady a very warm welcome to you...

WesternBluebird if you go back and read a lot of the posts you'll see that most of the women are complaining about 'not enough' or 'no attention' from their husband. That these men cheat on them by giving their time to magazines, TV, computers or worse - other women. Unless you haven't stated things completely, from what I've read your husband is oversexed BUT he wants 'you' and 'only you' right. You also stated he is finally beginning to pay attention to your other needs. Sounds like maybe he is not such a bad guy after all and remember (all of you ladies) you've faked it for all the previous years not wanting to make waves and never were honest about your true feelings and now you act surprised that he hasn't a clue what those real feelings are, well DAH!!!!

You're right, chatty, on all points.

Although, I wouldn't say I faked it (how do you fake it, anyway??), it was more like forcing myself to get in the mood.

"I use to be the martyr type that suffered in silence" was what you said earlier. You never shared your TRUE feelings with him, thats what I was referring to WB not just the sex but your feeling's about things in general. Hey, we all do it, I did and then couldn't understand why he was clueless. Because he wasn't a mind reader thats why. Most men are stupid enough when it comes to relationships and need all the help we can give to them...so being mysterious or a martyr doesn't ever work!

Oh and we fake it by saying 'yes' when we mean no or we'd rather just hold one another and talk, or take a nice walk together or maybe you'd rather be alone, read a book, watch TV, pet the dog or eat some chocolate, but instead we say yes, suffer silently while growing more and more resentful of the selfish person we married. Sound familar amyone???

[ September 28, 2005, 08:12 PM: Message edited by: chatty lady ]

Well that is what it boils down to, the selfish part. Not that he isn't a giving person, but he was definitely raised to put himself first.

And I have to add - I always put him first, so he got used to it!!

Exactly......thats what I'm saying.

Chatty,
I love your explaination of faking it

Life is too short! you deserve tobe happy! do what will make you feel good