Blue66, I work with battered women and even when they suffer physical abuse, it's hard for them to leave because of the fear of the unknown. It's a very real fear and keeps many of them emotionally paralyzed. Yes, divorce is very hard but what you're going through is much more difficult.

Do you want to really know what he's up to on the Internet? If you do, you can go online and download e-blaster.(about $100) You will then send an email to his email addy and when he opens it, it will be downloaded onto his pc. All his Internet activity will be emailed to your email addy so this means you have to have a personal account that he doesn't know about. But, you have to be willing to deal with what you discover. Many of my women have done this.

If you did this, would it make a difference? Or, would it just cause you more pain? He may say you're jealous but guess who is causing that jealousy? He's simply trying to put the blame back on your shoulders and you should never let him do that. Sounds like he's a cheat and looking for other women to have affairs with...even if some of them are online...cheating is cheating. The day will come when you finally realize you can be putting your effort and energy into something worthwhile.