Pink: wow. Very sorry to hear about your pain and struggles.

It is good for you that you have found solace in faith and also have taken the steps to secure counseling. You are certainly no mere whiner, but a self-advocate and that strength will surely see you through.

I think there are a lot of elements that go into a consideration like staying/walking away from any relationship, not the least of which are the less "heart-felt" and more on the practical end:

are you financially independent?
are there children from this relationship?
are you married/co-habitating?

depending on your answers to some of those questions (you don't have to answer them -- they were just for your own consideration) your decision about what to do may vary.

You could ask the fella if he'll go into joint (or his own) counseling. In the end, if both individuals (one is not enough) aren't committed to saving a relationship then there is no relationship, anyway. Not really. At least not one that is likely to help either party be nurtured and to grow spiritually.

Wounds take time to heal and old ones don't have much of a chance to mend if new ones are being inflicted daily. A little time and space, maybe?

Again, I don't know what your "level" of material entanglement is.

In any event, I'm sure you'll get some worthwhile thoughts from the ladies here. There is much heart here.

I wish you the best and encourage you to believe that the right solution already lies within you. I wager you will unfold it and discover what it is as you continue to wrestle with you dilemma.