As you all know,I'm a new step-grandma for about 4 months now. So, since I am already different, I want to start taking steps now by continuing to be different in baby Grace's life.

I also think that, if DH were still single, he'd just be traditional, so I need to put some pizzaz into this!

First thing we'll do (DH has approved) is to celebrate Grace's half birthdays. A friend's daughter was born on Jan 11 in 1980, but the daugther always missed out since it was so close to Christmas every year. She still celebrates half birthdays for her, today. And continues it with her 4 grandchildren!

So, since Grace was born Jan 30, July 30 will be her 1/2 birthday. I'm sure her other Grandma (bio-Mom to DSD) will "go all out" for her traditional b'day, I want Grace to have "special time" to look forward to each year with her Grandpa and Step-grandma (not sure what she will call me yet!) I want to start by buying a 6 month-outfit for her. Then find a July-birthday item and write a note on it. Any other ideas?

I was wondering if any other grandmas out there have "dared to be different". I'd love to hear your stuff!!

Hi Di,
I was just thinking about you the other day and wondering how you were doing. I too am a "different" step-grandmother who never had children of her own, so can relate to some of the things you've posted in the past.

My granddaughter is five now. She calls me Sharon, because when she was born, none of us knew what to call me. But when my granddaughter one day referred to her other grandmothers as her "other Sharons", I knew that a grandmother by any other name is still a grandmother to a little girl.

My GD knows that I'm not her blood grandmother. But she DOES know that I'm her HEART grandmother. We're very close, immeasurably in love with each other, and very significant in each other's lives. Maybe it's precisely because we're NOT blood-related - we don't have all that expectational family baggage to worry about, we can simply be the kindred spirits that we are and thoroughly enjoy each other.

I waited for many years to see if her other grandmothers would start a Christmas decoration "thing" with her, but realized this past Christmas that they don't seem interested in starting that particular tradition. So I got on eBay, scoured the site and managed to get "perfect" tree ornaments for each year since her birth, including a beautiful one for 2000...she was born Dec 28th, so the ornament for Christmas 2000 is a little silver ball that opens to reveal some tiny baby girl things - with a note about how 2000 was the Christmas that we were waiting for her, and that our Christmas wasn't complete until she arrived.

I haven't given her the ornaments yet (I started searching too late), but will give those first six to her at Advent of this year, and then continue to give her a special ornament every year, hopefully one that ties in with some event or activity that represents the past year (I'm looking for a piano for this year, because she's just started to play with two hands and is very proud of herself!)

Anyway, those half-birthdays are a great idea. We thought of doing that, but since we often take her shopping throughout the year, decided to call all of those gifts her "unbirthday" gifts, to make up for having to wait all year for both her birthday and Christmas. She understands and LOVES to go shopping for those unbirthday things.

Dare to be different. Build a special niche in her life. I simply loved my GD, no strings attached, and didn't have to force the relationship in any way...we've just somehow been best friends since the day she was born.

[ May 17, 2006, 09:34 AM: Message edited by: Eagle Heart ]

How beautiful, Eagle Heart!

Yeah, I do want to be "different"....but not that I'm normal NOW by any means!!

Her Grandpa is also different: He wears bib-overalls, farms, picks up toads and horned lizards; checks out bugs etc. We can't wait until she can spend time with us!

Hmmmm.the ornament idea. I love it! Maybe we can start to make one each year,since I know her other GM is not creative! Just ONE special ornament...for her!!

When we went over to see them a few weeks ago, Grandpa has already begun to introduce her to flowers, the toaster, the trash can!! He simply holds her in this odd way (with his forearms holding her as she faces out...the way his mother held babies) and would bring her around and say, "This is a toaster; this is a white flower" etc. So cute! He already has a mini-gardener's apron complete with mini-rake, trowel, gloves,hoe..ready for her to learn to grow stuff!

She will have three GM's and three grandpa's. Three steps. So, she'll be busy learning everyone's name. However, one GM and one GP are quite old already so not sure how long they will be around.They are about 25 years older than the rest of us!

Thanks again, for your input. Keep 'em coming. I think this will be fun, don't you??

I love the idea of making an ornament each year. We have several with their photos in the center. The grandsons love putting them on the tree and seeing how much they've grown.

Still Crowded and ALL... My youngest son bought his brother (my oldest) an ornament with their first child's pic on it. It's precious! I had never seen one of this quality before. I think SC's idea of seeing how they grow each year is an excellent one!

Isn't that Eagle something? She is so insightful and contributes so much. I'm not surprised to hear of the role you've taken with your grandchild Eagle. You are one of the most caring people I've never met. Love ya Hun...

Di, aren't you the smart one! I love the half-birthday thing. You should submit that idea to a "Mothering" magazine. And I also love the visual you've given us of your hubby's love for the child, carrying her around, teaching her things. How sweet! That's definietly a Kodak moment!

I have been snapping pictures like crazy when my own grandbeauty does things and saving the pictures to an album. Course its going to break me in colored ink, but what the hey! Someday I want to put a book together to give her on her 16th birthday. Life with Lea....

JJ

JJ.

I love the term "grandbeauty". May I use that one?

Sorry to admit,the half birthday is not my idea. A friend always did that for her daughter, and now her grandkids. I just think that baby Grace may be "jipped" out of a real celebration since her b'day is Jan 30...so WE will be the different ones!

Any other advice re: grandparenting? Since I was never a mother, I have no clue has to HOW to mentor little ones. Or, should I just let if flow?

Oh My gosh...you ladies are all just so adorable..I cannot wait until God blesses me with a grandchild so I can join in on these threads...but I am writing down all of these ideas you have for "special" ways of celebrating with your angels..

Di...I am crazy about your half birthday idea...how special will your little baby Grace feel when she gets to have a summer birthday every year too?...She is going to think you are fantastic!!

Eagle..I love your story about your GD's "other Sharons"...children are so purely honest...and speak only from their hearts...she obviously adores you ...you are both soooooooo lucky...I think your special ornament is such a fabulous idea...and just think...when she gets married she will have a whole box of beautiful ornaments with special memories attached to each one for her first Christmas tree..

JJ...I know how much you adore your 2 sweet angels...but your "Life with Lea" Sweet Sixteen gift already in the works is sensational...however...something tells me that there are going to be several volumes to present her with when all is said and done...

Still Crowded..."ornaments with pictures" on them...brilliant idea!!!!..as I said..I am writing these all down...

Thanks all...

Di, just go with your heart, it'll know what to do.

I want to do one of those journals that you write all about yourself and your life so she will know things about her grandmother and have something that is written down and something she can save for her own children. I think I did one for my daughter once, but I'm sure they have them for grandchildren.

Since my grandchild isn't due until January, I have many things to ponder, or at least my daughter does. She's asked me what I want the baby to call me. I guess I just figured she (or he) would call me Grammy. Now, I've been presented with a website with all kinds of names that children call their grandparents. I liked Grandmother, since that is what Julie Andrews was called in the Princess Diaries. My daughter thinks that's too stuffy. I guess she won't like Your Higness either. I could make it Grandma Royal. ?? I don't think I want to stress over this for the next 5 1/2 months, so I'll probably go with Grammy or Gram, which was my original idea. But, my daughter thought I might like Marmie. We went to see Little Women (the Play) in Boston last winter together and she knows how much I like Louisa May Alcott and the story. But, Marmie was the mother not the grandmother. I kind of like it though.

What is everyone else called these days?

Louisa

So glad I checked this thread. Lots of wonderful, charming thoughts about grandchildren. Our first, Dustin, is now 5 days away from 6 months. He is so sweet and happy. Gives a big smile all the time. He also reaches out for me now. Well, you know my heart flipped over that one.

I get the opportunity to have him three mornings a week while Mommy works part time. So, I am having the time of my life. He is now turning over, sitting up some, standing with help, cutting his first tooth, and on some baby foods. Busy time for his little body. It is was much fun to watch him discover his hands and feet. I am quite happy they asked me to sit with him.

I love all the ideas you ladies use for your little ones. I never thought of an unbirthday or half birthday-what a great thought. Yearly ornaments are something we do for our children so I hope we can continue with our grandson. However, I never thought of picture ornaments. I like that. The photo album is another great idea. I am in the process of snapping so many pictures of Dustin that I know he'll grow up thinking of me as the picture grandma.

I absolutely love the "other sharons". You must have been in heaven when you heard that, Eagle! Love between the two of you for sure. JJ I think "grandbeauty" is a fantastic name for you to give your little one. Lovely.

Recently my DIL asked us what we wanted our little one to call us. I told her since her mom had chosen "Grammy" that I love either "Gran" or "Granna". Im happy with either. Because my children often call my husband "Pops" he thought the grandson could call him "grandpop". So I guess we are settled on names finally.

One thing I have been doing besides the pictures is to keep a journal of what we (Dustin and I) do everytime we are together. I hope that will be somewhat different for him. I love writing his progress and my feelings about him in the daily journal of our times together.

I am happy we all have our special times and traditions, and names because those little ones are so special and they make our lives so very much more than we expected.

Sandpiper