I wrote most of those similes when I was in High School, in Norcross, Georgia. It was right after the solar eclipse on May 30, 1984. I was 15 years old.

I wrote them as a joke on purpose. I am shocked to find them all over the internet! For some reason, some sites show different people as being the authors of the ones I wrote, which I know I that I wrote.

Here's how it started... Our assignment in Advanced 9th Grade English (I'm serious) was to write similes, and the teacher explained how to do it. So, I thought I'd have some fun. The first one I wrote was, "Her eyes were like two brown circles with black dots in the center." I did it as an obvious joke. I was just messing with my teacher. I remember that I couldn't decide to end the sentence with "center" or "middle". So I asked a friend of mine which word I should use. He started cracking up laughing, and said to use "center". Then it just got out of control from there. We kept trying to see who could write the lamest, but funniest similes.

"Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever." That was mine, too. As well as the one about the Hummingbirds who had never met. I wrote most of those, and somewhere along the line, poeple have added to the collection, and even altered the ones I wrote! Like, there's a British version? What's that all about? I do like the one about Nancy Kerrigan's teeth! That was funny!

The saddist part of the whole thing is that poeple are assuming some stupid kids wrote those. Actually, they were written by two very intelligent teenagers, just having fun at the teacher's expense, just like typical High School students do.

-PF

[ April 04, 2005, 09:41 PM: Message edited by: pf ]