Meredith:
As a writer you are in control or your piece. You have the power to choose to follow or not the sugestions given by critiques. Only you know what your goal is.

If you were writing for a specific publication, there you'd be bound by their guidelines and vision. I trust that is not the case with this piece.

Like you mentioned, since your critique group knows your voice, they were probably not ready for the different style you're attempting to develop.

You know your voice, your story, your goal. You decide where to go with it and what changes to make without affecting the outcome or changing your vision.

A freelance writer writes to satisfy him/herself. Don't give up. You decide!