Charleen-- Well, I've certainly had my share of disappointments. (I just heard from my publicist a few minutes ago that Oprah turned the book down). But if there's one thing I've learned, it's that you gotta keep believing. You can't give up on yourself. (With enough grass-roots support for the book, even Oprah could change her mind!) Just want to clarify, though, that this IS my first book. I'd never written a single thing before, except one short academic article on reader-response theory--not exactly creative non-fiction. Anyway, thanks again for your notes. This is such a great site!!! Dotsie is the best, isn't she?

Prill, so glad you've chosen to hang with us.

Please tell us about your publicist...if you don't mind.

Hi Dotsie! I love hanging with you and am happy to share my publishing experience. Ask anything. My publicist is a woman in NYC named Maryann Palumbo. I hired her because I believe in this book and had no clue how to bring it to the attention of producers on The Today Show, Oprah, etc. (By the way, one of Oprah's producers supposedly read the book and loved it; it just didn't make it through the second round.) Anyway, Maryann does the national stuff; I do the rest. Every day, in addition to my writing, I try and do one thing to promote the book. (Today I did an interview with the Lexington Courier-Journal out of Kentucky.) I've got a whole file folder full of suggestions from wonderful women like you that I've been compiling for the past four years. My agent, Paul Fedorko, has also been incredibly supportive. A God-send. (http://www.tridentmediagroup.com/pfedorko.htm) FYI, Susan Page's book "The Shortest Distance Between You and Published Book" is a great primer for getting an agent, writing a proposal, etc. Hope this helps.

You know something...you write, you write, and you write, and you finally come to the end and have your book all ready to go to the publisher and then SOMEBODY'S (and I won't mention any names but their initials are DB and JK) started telling me all about the marketing side and what all is involved...

NOW I know the work has just begun...I mean can you believe what all you have to do just to get somebody to read your book and comment? And I'm a Queen for pete's sake!

A person stands a better chance of getting on the best seller list if they strip nakkid and run across a ballgame holding up their book....

wait...you know---okay, okay, I won't. But---ALRIGHT ALREADY! I won't do it. It was just a thought, okay?

JJ

Don't despair. We're here to help each other. I never thought I could write a book, but with much assistance--both earthly and divine--I did. (That's part of why I want to help other writers, to "pay it forward" so to speak.) Don't forget, you're a queen. The world will fall at your feet if your voice is true and your vision, clear.

and I can guarantee you one thing...they would fall at my feet laughing if I DID strip nakkid and run across a ballfield! ha! It wouldn't be pretty...

Thanks for the encouragement Prill...

Do you mind me asking what was your biggest hurdle to overcome?

JJ

I think a crowd would gag and vomit and ask me to put my clothes back on!

JJ: I'll tell you something the editor at my publishing house told me if it helps.

"We are looking for a new or different slant to an old topic."

Let's face it, there aren't many topics that haven't been written about or written about over and over so they are looking for something unique. My book was on domestic violence and she said they must receive over 200 manuscripts or query letters on that topic alone every year. And, most of them were..."my ex beat me, I left, here I am." No answers for the reader. (If you write a self-help book, you gotta give answers!) They liked the fact that I addressed what I felt or thought and the lies I told myself and how I humbled myself to be completely honest. It makes a difference if you let the readers into your heart and show them you aren't perfect either. I can't read a book written by a woman who seems to be a mini goddess or something! I need a human being!

All good pointers given ladies. That is what makes this boomer site work so wonderfully. Every one is willing to share and care. I'm coining my very own boomer phrase here when I say that this site allows us to go Boomer-to-Boomer, or in laymans terms...door to door asking questions, offering advice, and helping each other.

Oh and one more thing...what do you mean you don't want to read a book written by a goddess?

Goddess JJ

Let me add my congrats! I went to your website and loved it!! What you tell women is: follow your heart, and don't be afraid to fall. Great advice for everyone.

My friend the Queen asked what was my biggest hurdle. The answer is self-doubt--a huge impediment to any creative endeavor. But I also had to get over my shyness. (In the beginning, I used to get butterflies in my stomach before picking up the phone to call someone I didn't know--not helpful when you need to set up interviews.) Slowly, though, I started to walk through my fears. I practiced. Every day I tried to do one bold thing. I still do. When I felt those butterflies, I kept right on going. The more you face down fear, the more you see it's just a phantom.