The thing I always ask myself when I read the shoulds versus coulds stuff is what about the haves.

There are certain things you have to do. You have to eat, so you have to cook dinners. You have to be clothed to go out in public, so you have to do laundry. You don't want to breath in so much dust you develop asthma, so you have to clean.

I guess the big thing is knowing when something isn't a have, or how to balance the have tos with the shoulds and coulds. I definitely feel like my life is nothing but haves. This constant sense of responsibility is something I am trying to work on. I guess I should maybe think of some of my haves as shoulds though.