That was me and I stand by it. I'm not talking about sexual abuse, I'm talking about 'ordinary' beating your kid -- and in this area women are just as likely to harm their kids as men are. And yes, I have checked my facts. There are plenty of kids in emergency rooms and graves because of their mothers. Jusd check the news: it's not one bit unusual to learn that some woman has just been arrested for beating or even killing her kids. Usually it's drugs, alcohol, immaturity, poverty, or just plain craziness, but there's way too much of it out there and women are not innocent bystanders in this particular area. Men may be more likely to knock a child unconscious or kill him, but women, who are with their children far more, dish out plenty of verbal and physical abuse. Sometimes it's brutal.

I agree it's too bad all mothers aren't good mothers. Plenty of
us can testify to both sides of that coin!

"Usually it's drugs, alcohol, immaturity, poverty, or just plain craziness"
This is a stereo type that only perpetuates the myth that abuse does not occur in "my back yard." Especially offensive is implied notion that if a family is poor then there is more likely abuse occurring in the family. What is the definition of "immaturity?" Of course, many men and/or women may be 40 and have the maturity of a adolescent. It is a matter of checking the facts independent of the bias of a newspaper. There are plenty of facts at, for example, the department of justice, which only shows stats on reported by law enforcement agencies. It is true that poverty in and of itself creates a great deal of stress. However, I've facilitated plenty of programs for "moms at risk" (of hurting their children) and all of the moms were from suburbia, and well above the poverty line. Please let's not invent and/or perpetuate the stereotypical concepts stated above.

PL,
What? What are you talking about? What stereo concepts? I didn't read where anyone narrowed the abuse field to poor, rich, uptown or downtown; color; or young and old. So, please explain what you mean there, girl? One person said some mothers are abusive. Another person said statistics show more men than women are known
abusers. Unless I'm missing something, I don't get it!

In Post 185840. Jabber, if I understand the words written there, and maybe I miss understand because I have not talked with the author of the words, I see the comment that "usually it's drugs, alcohol, ...." involved in abuse. I am saying emphatically that while drugs, alcohol, poverty, mental illness ARE factors in abuse, there is plenty of evidence that abuse does not necessarily "usually" occur under those conditions. My frame of reference from personal (professional) experience was that none of the above (drugs, alcohol, mental illness, poverty) were NOT indicators of abuse, or potentially abusing children.

Princess we benefit immensely from understanding your exposure due to your professional work experience. You are one of the very few in this forum who directly has provided counselling on a professional basis to a broader base of people compared to any of us.

I strongly agree that poverty, alcoholism, drug abuse or immaturity does not automatically mean physical abuse of children. I'm sure some of us know several examples, where there was dysfunctional behaviour in the parent(s), but the children, in the end, were fine.

Thanks, Princess.

Gee, I wasn't aware that drug or alcohol abuse, or mental illness, or family dysfunction were confined to poor people, or 'other' people, but if you want to take it that way, I'm sorry for being so imprecise. And with that I will bow out of this thread. Sorry.

Ellemm, communication on the internet forums can get confusing. That is the way I /perceived the statements but perhaps not what was intended? I don't know while receiving words printed on a screen, without benefit of seeing the entire person in person. Orchid, thanks for your comments. And Anne, oh my gosh it is scary to think of what those children and perhaps any pets they may have, are going through.

I truly respect your opinion Ellemm but 'do not' aqgree with what you say. Verbal abuse yes, it can be damaging but a spanking when done properly and only when necessary, does not injure a child.

I suppose this is one of those subjects like politics, and religion, everyone has an opinion but no one really KNOWS for sure. Makes for a good thread however. May I inquire as to your thoughts on punishment of those abusers. The serious abusers I mean, men or women? I will admit to wanting to hang them high by their thumbs and let them die and rot 'slowly' in the heat of our desert sun, and thats the truth on my part.

The research I've read recently, indicates more abuse occurs in
the poorer sections of town. Common sense says, folks with less
money cannot pay to occupy their leisure time. And hence wouldn't have as much recreation to think about and contemplate
in their mind. My experience has been that abuse spans all classes and I have to agree with Ellemm, plenty of females
mistreat their children. Personally, I am a product of 4 generations of abuse. My bio family were poor folks. But those who abused me during my childhood were from the higher end of
middle class. That's why I contend all classes participate in
the abusiveness factor!