MA, you were right. I put the ball back in her court and sent her a card. I feel better that I am not bending to her plan,...whatever that is.

Edelweiss, the good thing for little A, is that she has an immediate advocate, right there...her father...no matter, what happens.

Have you gotten back into your painting?

Yes Orchid, you're right. I just don't agree with how they handeled the new beginning. Many have said they think the mother won't last in her motherhood,... but I don't know if Hubby and I are willing to be "used" again, and then dropped like hot potatoes when not needed. uh uh...no more.

No, I haven't started to paint yet. I've been busy getting my website up to date. Even got a sale going...woohee.
While in the States, we discovered a gallery with the most impressive black and white photography. Hubby and I were so inspired, that we've started this new hobby, and are having a great time with it. How about you? Have you been painting since your art class?

Ooops, EW. I guess I am on the wrong track here..gotta think about what everyone wrote here. Maybe I am on the "right" track for me and the way I am? I know that I get walked on to some degree..at times..but then comes this wonderful kindness and "meeting" on a very deep level..and it all seems worth while for me..but that´s ME.

You asked me a question..so I´ll send this and then check out your question.

You have been badly treated, darling..and so has your hubby. I still think this, unfortunately, indicates there are alot of problems in your son´s home. I aincerely hope they will find their way.

ok..your question was about the card..and you sent her one. And it feels good for you. I guess that´s all the answer you need.

Lots of love, dear EW..and I sort of hope that everything mends one way or the other..your new hobby with your hubby sounds like fun!

EW, please tell us more about your black and white photos. Could you email me the site (if you don't want to put it here).

Hello my dear friends. I just read this thread through again. Gosh, I'm so lucky to have you all. Where is Mountain Ash and Gims? You are missed here you know.

The reason I got this thread up again is because my son called to tell us that the court has taken "A's" passport from her mother, (which she had hidden), and they have officially given our son the sole right to decide where his daughter shall live. This isn't sole custody;…not yet. First they have to do marriage counselling together, and if that doesn't work,…then my son will go for the sole custody thing.

So ladies, you were all right with your future forecasts. Just wanted to let you know. Love you all!

Hi Edelweiss

Thanks so much for updating us on what is happening. I'm so glad to hear the court is listening to your son...he sounds like an amazing man and father and advocate for "A". I'm holding your family in prayer as they walk through this challenging time.

Wow!!! Things are really happening, EW..and for the good it would seem.

Wishing you all only the best...

In some ways it is saddest of all for the child at this time.

While the mother is not the best mother (Was my mother? No, she yelled at us alot and could hve praised us abit more often. But we turned out ok.), there is always the possibility she will become..a better mother in the future over time, via a very hard lesson at this time of her marriage when now the court is now involved. AFter all, unless I have misunderstood facts or don't know further details, the mother does not have drug addiction nor disabling mental illness that renders her not quite cognizant of caring for another human being.

What I am trying to say, does not diminish your role, EW at all. It is hoped that if little A. lives with you for awhile, that the arrangement will be open and trusting with the mother for visits, etc.

The child is aware of her mother and vice versa. There is already an established bond, no matter what the quality of the maternal-child bond is. As a daughter grows older, particularily if the child already looks part black,/Afro-American, it does help for her own identity as a woman conscious of her roots (she will become to be seen by many strangers and loved ones as part-black), to know of her mother in a positive way.

Before people here take offense, I say with acute knowledge that I have 2 sisters, who each have half-Chinese children because their husbands are Caucasian. For well-rounded, healthy children to grow into healthy adults in mind and spirit, it really helps the child as a result of biracial unions, know positively both birth parents. I see this in my 24 yr. niece and her 22 yr. nephew now.

The best example is famous now: Barak Obama. His own healthy sense of being an American citizen, biracial and comfortable in his own skin/identity.