I wanted to continue what's going on in this forum instead of where it started in the Marriage forum, under MIL not respecting our wishes.

Larry told his sister she could not come to our home due to her drug use. I found out today that she called and left a nasty message on his cell phone. Larry's mom told him the night he told her she could not come over that she pitched a crying fit for 3 hours and his mom thought she would have to take her to the hospital. Larry's mom said she thought Robin calmed down and then she went off the deep end again.
Robin has always been able to do what she wants and she can't with this and she's really angry. I think it may be one of the first times in her life that she's not getting her way.
Larry's doing okay but I know if he sees her while visiting her Mother that she's going to go into some dramatic crap and cause a scene.
Robin's mental state, coupled with her drug use, trippled with her unwillingness to stay on any of her medication is one big recipe for a nasty situation. Personally, I think Robin may be unstable enough to hurt someone over this...and that worries me.
This is tearing Larry apart but all Robin wants to see is how it's affecting her. Ya'll pray for us, okay?

Dee, do you feel like she may do something to you? What does Larry think? I will pray for you. And maybe you should get an alarm system installed for your house.

Dee, prayers added.

Dee
your concerns...can you say what makes you think there is a danger?
just let the words flow..


Anyone who cries for that length of time should see a doctor.Even if she is acting part of the time and inciting herself to be hysterical.
Mountain ash

Prayers coming at ya from here, too. Robin sounds like a miserable person who wants everyone around her to be as miserable as she is.

My prayers are there for all of you, too.

Is it possible to have her committed for a bit, to get her back on drugs and dry her out? I know, impossible to do unless she wants, but I thought I would ask.

Larry and I are on our way out but I promise to answer back on this this evening...my heart is heavy from all this but I'm not going to let this drag me down...we do have an alarm system and I keep it on. Thanks for asking, friends. Love you guys.

Edelweiss, Merideth, Crosstitch, Anne 327 and Anno...thanks for your kind words of support and interest. It's greatly appreciated.

Yes, my house is alarmed...and it's always on.

Second, My MIL went with me and Larry 3 years ago to a drug counselor hoping we could help mom see how she's enabling Robin in her behavior and use. It didn't make a dent at all. None...Zero...Natha...I mean she really could care less...as Mom gets older the more defensive she becomes in protecting Robin...why? Haven't a clue except Robin blames all her problems, all her drug use, all her failures, all her misory's on her mom and tells her that all the time...ALL the time. Mom had Robin put in a mental place for 3 months when Robin hit rock bottom 2 years ago...did it do any good? No...Robin called her and told her how awful it was until eventually mom signed her out and swore she'd never put Robin there again. Robin knows all the has to do is cry enough and her mom will rescue her no matter what.
Is Robin capable of violence? Most definitely. Mom's confided in her oldest daughter that Robin has hit her and left bruises...but will Mom press charges? No.
The reason I am leary of Robin is her schitzophrenic behavior on top of her drug use...all one has to do is pick up the papers and read where this type of personality mixed with drugs snapped and hurt or killed people. It concerns me, yes, because it's hard to preduct what and when a person like this will go over the edge. Robin ranted for 3 hours after Larry told her she could not come into our home as a drug user...who rants for 3 hours almost the point of going to the hospital? Someone who can't control their emotions and behavior...THAT concerns me. And of course, Larry says she blames me first and foremost.
Anne...we will continue to protect our home and there's no way we're backing down on this. Larry, as I knew he would, sees the reality of all this...it's hard when it's a family member so messed up and out of control. As long as he and I stand by each other and protect our home we'll be fine.

Hi Dee! I'm sorry for this horrid mess that your SIL has created for your family. I have some experience in this sort of behavior, and I'm getting more as I took a position in the hospital.

You have done all that is humanly possible in this case except one thing:
Your husband must call the police as well as adult protection should her mother be hurt by her one bit.
To continuely have her arrested is the point to which her life has dropped.
It's hard to call the police and insist of pressing charges when it comes to family, but it must be done. Laws now do not require your MIL to press charges, the police have that authority now.
Were I you, and it's only my idea, I would hope that she did get arrested and more than once so the judge finally puts the law in charge of her rehab.
Some people do not listen to anything in rehab unless the police take over:\
Paris Hilton,
Robert Downey Jr.

She belongs off the street, out of society and paying for her damages. I know that what she has is a disease but to make a person take their med's often requires a court order and consequences if they fail.

What do you think? Would your husband have her arrested if he found that she had struck your mother? It would be the best all around. If she comes to your home and causes a distubance, I would vow to call the police in that case as well.

Dancer9, seeing addicts in action in my career.

(I've had to have my mother arrested three times to get her medicated (she threatened her life,) and she has had to be court ordered still to take care of simple health problems. She is schizophrenic.)

Dancer...wow..sounds like you've had lots of things to deal with in your lifetime. I feel for your situation.

We talked months ago to the police...unless his mom presses charges there's nothing they can do. Robin's sister is retired from the court system and if anyone knows how to look at this and try to find a solution it's she...however, her hands are tied as long as mom protects Robin. I've personally spoken with protective service for seniors...and unless Mom steps up, their hands are tied. It's pathetic, but that's how it is.