It's been my experience with every loss, every loved one that has gone on, that when the loss was new, when the pain was most intense, when I needed the comfort of my loved one with me the most, that's when I was least able to feel it. Like you say, Searcher, it was me, not them. Pain gets in the way of knowing, of feeling our loved ones with us. The more debilatating the pain, the bigger block to the awareness of their presence. Oh, I'm sure they have other lives, other things to do. The next dimension or heaven or whatever we want to call it, has wondrous possibilities. So our loved ones are busy doing their things, but... but the call of love is strong, and it is my belief that in the next world, it's possible to be doing two things at once. They are our angels on our shoulders. As we heal, as we grow, we can come to know more and more that they are with us, holding our hands, bathing us in love.

Nichole was with you, Searcher, on your journey to the mountains, I'm sure of it, even if she was doing healing work on the next level too. You love her, she loves you. There is nothing stronger than love. Those who love follow one another across eternity.