Chatty, I am so sorry you had that experience. It seemed that you were enjoying your faith so much.
I understand how single women are shuffled out of the larger church family. I never was accepted there either. But I took my kids anyway. I guess they knew better than to exclude them. We went three or more times a week and I dated the sunday school teacher and other single guys in the church. I never got accepted by the married women, but I think they finally gave up on driving me either to a 'singles' corner or out.
I always thought I had a family so we particiapted in the family events. And no one dared exclude my kids. They probably knew I would go berserk. But I was never a part of the "We are family" contingent.
As to infidelity in the church, Christianity is such an intimate experience that it can bring men and women together in an intimate way which can easily lead to physical intimacy as well. That's not to defend it, but I believe it is easy to get into. Maybe if you forgive the preacher and move on probably to another church, it will mean God will forgive you for any sins you might have.
If you enjoyed church, there are tons of them, go find another and be your wonderful self. Let it be all about exercising your spirit for yourself, and don't ever let it be for anyone else at all. You're a good person and you deserve it.
smile