Hello chikadee, sandpiper, dianne and songbird! thanks for welcoming me here...about the details, chikadee, he texts and calls his kids asking them how they are doing at home and school but never asks about me...my kids are all girls, ages 7, 9 and 11..my husband is with the military and we dont have a normal set up of family life since he comes homes from his assignment at least 4 times in a year...i guess i could say the distance became our enemy meaning, in the latter part of our marriage, we have become indifferent to each other and started to drift apart....the fights were present everytime we were together....i could say we havent communicated to each other what was wrong, we never understood each other's needs until it was too late and this happened....you were asking why was my hubby angry at me is becos before this happened, my hubby was accusing me of having an affair...his accusations was based on asking his kids how late i am coming from work, saw me in front of our pc late at nite (accused me of chatting) and dreaming about me with another guy...of course i am not guilty of doing anything wrong except for the chatting which i admitted when i caught him to be with another woman...that led to our actual separation, i caught him and out of my anger, shock and hurt, i admitted to him i was chatting and wished im in love with someone....hurtful and angry words were exchanged during that time...after that, ive heard he was telling our friends he doesnt want me and we're through...at first, ive tried to talk to him, texts him and wrote him letters, telling him how sorry i was and if he could give us another chance, if we could talk...but he just ignored me...it's been almost a year by next month that we are like this, no talk, no communication, nothing between us...if he wants to say something to me, he tells it to my niece who takes care of my kids when im at work...i am talking to a counselor, attending spiritual seminars and talks, attends mass (i am a catholic), read the bible and try to change my bad attitudes and remove all the negative thoughts i have...right now, i have my realizations and understanding on my shortcomings and failures in this marriage and i want to get healed and recover...about my hubby, from time to time, i still think about the pain and hurts he caused me and thats what i want to get healed and recovered from too...to totally forgive him, forgive myself and forgive each other...thats what im praying for, and i trust that the Lord will prepare my hubby and me when the chance to talk and meet again comes...i hope and pray both of us will be ready and have peace in our hearts when that happens....thanks and God bless...