Wow, this is a tough one. This will be over by September, Hannelore? My first inclination would be for you to keep the baby and let her mom have her dream.

If you can all look at the positive aspects:

- Anaiya has your family; a very strong and stable presence in her life.

- How many opportunities do we get to really live our dreams, like her mother is doing?

- How would her mother feel if she gave it up and came home? I imagine resentful. She most likely feels very guilty right now, whether she displays it or not.

- Can you look at it as an opportunity to spend these very special years with your grandchild, forming a strong permanent bond?

- Can her husband understand how special this time is for his wife? If he had an olympic dream (or other passion that he wanted to go for), would the shoe be on the other foot?

I would imagine Anaiya can hear and sense the disruption in the family. Maybe if you and your son got on the same page to support your DIL through this special time, everyone will all be happier at the end. Kids are very resilient - she has you there consistently, and her mom and dad on some weekends, and she'll understand and be very proud of her mom in the years to come.... unless this breaks every one apart and loses the special meaning of having dreams come true.

I think you all need to look at the positive aspects of this adventure, and try to share the excitement with Anyaia. Kids of her age understand a lot more than we give them credit for.

Kathy