I am working with a journalist who writes for publications like Redbook and Good Housekeeping. She's working on an article for Match.com's online love and relationship magazine (Happenmag.com) about a new study that just came out which found that sex on a first date is twice as likely for singles over 50 than for their under-40 counterparts. Some other interesting points to the study were that 76 percent wanted to be wooed the old fashioned way and expected the guy to pick up the check on the date. Also that 53 percent of people over 50 rated lust and passion more highly than marriage. And that Boomers are three times more likely then twenty-somethings to hit on a complete stranger.

Do you agree or disagree?

Here are her questions. Mind sharing your feedback?

1) Why do you think Boomers are so willing to have sex on the first date? Is it because they are past the point of playing games, know what they want quicker than they did when they were younger, or just take a more casual approach to sex?

2) Why do you think 53 percent rated lust and passion so much higher than marriage? Is it because most single Boomers have been married before and have somewhat of a "been there, done that" attitude toward marriage and dont NEED to be legally bound to someone to make a relationship work?

3) Given that 76 percent of the women polled want to be wooed by their date and expected him to pick up the check, does this idea of being old fashioned conflict with their modern attitude toward casual sex?

4) What advice would you give to Boomers who are out there dating and dealing with the expectations or desire to have sex so quickly? Any words of caution?

5) And finally, considering that Boomers are three times more likely than 20-somethings to hit on a complete stranger, does this mean that you get more confident as you age? If so, why?
Thanks ladies.

1) Why do you think Boomers are so willing to have sex on the first date? Is it because they are past the point of playing games, know what they want quicker than they did when they were younger, or just take a more casual approach to sex? I'm very happy to say I don't fall into that percentage, but I would venture to guess there is a ticking noise in their ears...Father time. The noise I hear in mine is also a Fatherly one. Daddy. The one that instilled values.

2) Why do you think 53 percent rated lust and passion so much higher than marriage? Is it because most single Boomers have been married before and have somewhat of a "been there, done that" attitude toward marriage and dont NEED to be legally bound to someone to make a relationship work?I don't have a clue on this one, because I wouldn't get up out of my computer chair for lust, passion, or marriage. What did these people do during their 20's and 30's?

3) Given that 76 percent of the women polled want to be wooed by their date and expected him to pick up the check, does this idea of being old fashioned conflict with their modern attitude toward casual sex?I don't know if it conflicts with their modern attitude, or just says to the world, I WANT THIS, I DESERVE THIS, AND I WENT WITHOUT THIS. NOW I'm doing it MY way. Maybe?

4) What advice would you give to Boomers who are out there dating and dealing with the expectations or desire to have sex so quickly? Any words of caution? Can you say D-I-S-E-A-S-E, stalkers, date-rape, abuse, background checks, and guys looking for 401K's?

5) And finally, considering that Boomers are three times more likely than 20-somethings to hit on a complete stranger, does this mean that you get more confident as you age? If so, why?Again, I do not fall into this category, so I can only guess, and that would be that women are more self-assured and are not intimidated by a stranger's presence. They've raised their kids while holding down other jobs, cared for, or watched as their own parents aged and possibly died, and in a nutshell, they've seen it all. They've played all the games and now they are ready for THEIR time. "Playing nice" can get in the way of their plans. They want the brass ring.
Thanks ladies.

1) Why do you think Boomers are so willing to have sex on the first date? Is it because they are past the point of playing games, know what they want quicker than they did when they were younger, or just take a more casual approach to sex?
--- I think it is because they aren't so shy and unsure of themselves. They know what they want, they know how to protect themselves, and maybe they feel it's less risky now. I know I was a nervous wreck when I was young. I've been married for 32 years but if I were divorced or widowed, I'd sure like to see what other "adventures" might be out there.

2) Why do you think 53 percent rated lust and passion so much higher than marriage? Is it because most single Boomers have been married before and have somewhat of a "been there, done that" attitude toward marriage and dont NEED to be legally bound to someone to make a relationship work?
---- I think that once we're older, many of us may not feel the need to be married. We may like our independence and want some of the side benefits of marriage, without the commitments and the feeling of being "stuck".

3) Given that 76 percent of the women polled want to be wooed by their date and expected him to pick up the check, does this idea of being old fashioned conflict with their modern attitude toward casual sex?
---- I think a woman can still enjoy sex without losing the courtesies of days gone by. But that doesn't mean she won't pick up the check the next time around. We don't want to have to "owe" the man anything.

4) What advice would you give to Boomers who are out there dating and dealing with the expectations or desire to have sex so quickly? Any words of caution?
----- Men are still men. Don't have casual sex and then hope for a long term relationship. Don't fantasize that you can change him, or think that he'll commit because you're having sex. Be VERY careful about protection; while you may not be able to get pregnant any longer, there are still many diseases that can be passed along.

5) And finally, considering that Boomers are three times more likely than 20-somethings to hit on a complete stranger, does this mean that you get more confident as you age? If so, why?

---- I do think we get more confident as we age. I know I'm much more confident of myself in many ways, including sexually. I imagine if I were in the divorced/widowed category, I wouldn't mind having some casual (SAFE) relationships just for fun and companionship. I don't think I'd be looking for long term any right away.

Hope this helps!!
Kathy

Wow, talk about questions, geesh!!! Where do these percentages and ideas generate from? I'm not so sure I agree older women are so eager for sex especially on a first date. Not the single women I know. They are ladies after all and age dosn't change them into raging sex fiends or make them say, hard up to jump the first old bones that rattle by. Everyone is different. One thing thsat needs to be the same however is safe sex. Its a nasty infected bunch out there. Lost a good friend that didn't listen and jumped in bed with someone questionable, she got aids and died within a year.

1) Don't agree with this statistic. I don't know anybody that would have sex on the first date. And if they did, I'd think they'd lost their mind.
2) Marriage is a scary thing. Been there. Done that, twice!
Never again. I don't know any gal overrun by lust and passion. I joke about cute guys. I'm human. My grandma flirted with cute guys, when she was age 84. I've seen late life marriages and some of them aren't pretty! Older people consider the fact that you not only marry a person, but most often marry the entire FAMILY. Young people only consider the LOVE interest.
3) It's fun to be wooed. It's fun to go to diner with a companion, relax and have someone to share life's little pleasures.
4) What's the big focus on SEX? Few men are good at it!
5) I think you gain confidence with age. I love to talk with folks out in public. But I disagree that Boomers would be more likely to hit on a stranger. IMO younger people are less apt to weigh the dangers. The possibility of getting AIDS, would scare the beegeebies out of me!

It isn't that I'm so straight laced or a prude. But some people are linked for years and years and they still don't know each other. In this area, recently, a woman found out her husband was the "bike path rapist." Law enforcement had been looking for that guy over 25 years. In fact, an innocent man spent 25 years in jail for a crime the real rapist committed. Imagine the shock and awe of that woman, married for years to a murderer. I had recent experiences with people I thought I knew. And they weren't what I thought they were and I'd known them over three decades. That's why I answered the first question the way I did! Just wanted you to know!

jabber, once again you are the voice of many. I so appreciate your comments and couldn't agree more. I'm like Chatty, where the heck did these precentages come from?

The women I know that are single would no more jump in the sack with a guy on the first date than they would on the tenth. They take relationships seriously and aren't out to join the "disease-of-the-month" club but rather a lasting relationship with someone they have mutural respect for, and many common interest.

Whatever happened to friendships first? Getting to know a person? I'm certainly no prude, but I would like to get to know someone, or at least their name, address, and next of kin before I ---okay, that was a joke...

Yes! I'm with you and chatty. Some of these polls are unreal. Who or whom do they ask? It's insane to jump into bed with a stranger. Russian roulette would be a lot less painful!

I don't know why it's assumed Boomers DO have sex on their first date....but I'm very sure it happens!
Boomers are also beginning to collect social security and we all know how these laws mess up average people wanting to get married again and yet losing their social security because of it....this is so wrong. But I think it's one reason why they don't tie the knot so easily.
Who doesn't like a little lust and passion? I'm all for it!!! As for wanting to be wooed, I think many women eat this up and maybe, yes, it's our old fashioned taste....oh there's so many angles on these questions....

Most of us must hang out with other sensible/sane women. So we only see a snippet of real world women.

Dotsie you should question that journalist how the study was conducted and how many women were interviewed. No doubt there are boomer women who have jumped into the sack and jumped out the next day forever.